[Chris confronts The Lemonade Stand Gang]
Well, well, well. If it isn't the guy with no car.
I'm here to make peace.
We're not interested.
Yeah, so scram!
Moose!
What? How come I don't get to express my opinions?
It undermines the dramatic effect of my statements.
Oh.
Look, I tried it Dan's way for a little bit and I didn't like myself very much.
Huh, we don't like you much either.
We've all done things we regret, haven't we?
Nope.
Uh-uh.
Uh, I ate a frog once.
So let's stop treating each other like enemies and be friends. [Timmy kicks him] Ow!
See, mister, it's like this. Life is a 0-sum game. If you want something, you have to take it from someone else.
That's not true. You can- [Timmy kicks him again] Ow! Not my shins again.
Guys, the shins.
[as he is beaten up by The Lemonade Stand Gang] Ow! Stop it! Ow!
[holding the tape] Now I've got you!
Get him! I want that tape!
[Dan runs off]
[checking his leg] Much better.
[Dan gives Elise the tape and runs off as The Lemonade Stand Gang finds the tape in the car]
There it is!
[the teacher is having a meeting with The Lemonade Stand Gang's parents in the classroom]
And I'd just like to thank the wonderful efforts of--
[comes inside the classroom] May I have the floor for a moment? I'm a local resident who has been terrorized by a group of juvenile delinquents. [plays a video of the Lemonade Stand Gang] Here's footage of The Lemonade Stand Gang throwing lemonade on an elderly lady. And here's them kicking a citizen unmercifully in the shins.
Is that my Timmy?
And if you look outside right now, you can see them destroying a car.
[everyone can see The Lemonade Stand Gang destroying a car outside from the window]
[comes out the school and stops her son from destroying a car] Timmy! Stop that at once!
Mom? Uh, I can explain.
Is this what you've been doing? Vandalism? Extortion? I wondered how your lemonade stand was making a thousand dollars a week.
Mom?
Well, no more! All that money is going to charity!
[The Lemonade Stand Gang parents pick up their kids and punish them]
NOOO!
We were set up!
It was all Timmy's idea.
[in the car] I regret nothing!
[The Lemonade Stand Gang parents drive away]
More from this episode
All quotes from this episode →More Dan Vs. quotes · These quotes come from Wikiquote's Dan Vs. pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.