Don Flack quotes from CSI: NY

A little out of your jurisdiction, aren't ya?

Mac

When you called me, I thought you were in New York.

Sneaky like that. Plus it made it easier to find you.

Mac

Sinclair?

Yeah. He doesn't like to be embarrassed, Mac. So I got the rundown from Detective Brennan. Don't you wanna tell me what this is really about?

Mac

Wanna take a ride?

Long as it's not on the subway.

Laughing Larry? You gotta be kidding me. Do you have any idea how much of my childhood was cruelly destroyed by this moron?

Lindsay

Trust me. I feel your pain.

Stella

You two wanna enlighten me here?

I was into comic books as a kid, right?

Yep.

And this guy had a full-page ad in the back of each and every one of ‘em selling things like Dribble Glasses, Onion Gum, Hypno-Coins, Whoopee cushions.

Lindsay

Plastic vomit, rubber dog-doo.

Hmm. Sounds great.

Oh, yeah. And it all looked great. And I'd do whatever it took. I would scrimp, I would save, I would mow every last lawn in the neighborhood to get my hands on Sneezing Salts or a hundred-piece Battle Fleet. And then, I go to the mailbox, and right there, before my innocent young eyes, would be disappointment in a cardboard box.

Lindsay

I once spent my entire summer allowance on this hovercraft that Laughing Larry said would take me and my friends riding on a carpet of thin air. Hovercrap!

How about the x-ray specs I bought in middle school to see through a girl's clothes? The only thing I ever saw through those was a nun coming at me with a yardstick.

Danny

You know what? You should mind your own business.

You're my friend, Danny. It makes it my business.

(at Danny's apartment, to the Super) All right, open it up.

Don't I need a warrant or something?

Yeah, but you also need a fire extinguisher on every floor.

Now that you put it that way.(unlocks the door)

(outside the bail-bonds buidling) Nice place to play hooky. Personally, I would a gone with the batting cages.

Danny

It's closed for maintenance.

Ollie Barnes is not worth screwing up your career, Danny.

Danny

I give a crap about that cockroach.

Oh, yeah? Then why am I here?

Angell

Hey. I thought you were off today.

Yeah, something came up with Danny. It - (looks up, seeing other Detectives nearby) It's a long story. How 'bout I tell you later over an Irish coffee?

Angell

I think I know just the place...

Come on, do you really think I'm going to kill someone over a city contract?

Worth close to five million dollars? Yeah, I do.

Mac

So will a jury.

I've been a dedicated city employee for twelve years. You'd think when I try to branch out a little, start my own company, those years would count for something. You know what? It didn't count for squat. City went with low-bid, like they always do...is that fair?

Mac

A woman lost her life inside that bathroom because of your reckless abandon and your greed. You want to talk about fair? Go talk to her family.

Angell

(strapping on a kevlar vest, sees Flack staring at her) ...What?

(gruffly) You look good in a vest.

Angell

(laughs)

(about the vic's phone) Her cell's been ringing non-stop.

Mac

She's all dressed up. Someone is calling wondering where she is.

I dont have the heart to answer it and tell whoever it is the bad news that she's not gonna make it.

I hear you have an inspector in-house.

Stella

Yeah, I think, at some point, she worked with Mac. They were both up for his job.

He doesn't mind her looking over his shoulder?

Stella

Actually, it's weird, he seems to be fine with it.

Is she pretty? This inspector? (she gives him a look as he smiles) I'm just sayin'.

Mac

(about all the calls he's been getting) Every five minutes it's someone else. Half the brass wants me working the cabdriver serial.

But you caught a murder at an elite prep school whose alumni contribute half the mayor's campaign funds.

Mac

Not to mention Deputy Inspector Gerrard's daughter is a student there. Until we catch this cabdriver, my phone's not gonna stop ringing.

Detective Stella Bonasera

[at the same time as Mac] Who discovered the body?

Detective Mac Taylor

[at the same time as Stella] Who discovered the body?

You two've been working together way too long. A student came in looking for her keys and "boom".

Detective Mac Taylor

Boom? You and Danny have been working together way too long.

He was an inspiration, the kinda man i'd like to be in 20 years, only earning 50 times more. You know its sad when such a young life is taken before...[cut off by Flack].

Stop. Just stop.

(during her interrogation, rhythmically slapping the table) Eat a salad. Eat a salad. That's the chant he started. It was two years ago but I can still feel the humiliation like it was yesterday. My boyfriend was at that game. He dumped me the very next day. And because my fat face was on the big screen, complete strangers would come up to me telling me to eat a salad.

Danny

So you chose to get back at Dugan Scott by killing him?

Crime of passion?

Lindsay

Crime of patience.

I worked my ass off. Literally. I swore I would do whatever it took, gastric bypass, liposuction, plastic surgery, tryout after tryout after tryout until I finally made the squad. Just so I could watch him eat his poison words in front of everyone.

Hell of a game, Mess.

Detective Danny Messer

Yeah. Glad you could make it.

Me too. You should piss Lindsay off more often.