Sara Sidle quotes from CSI: Crime Scene Investigation

Sara

Do you ever want to be a cop?

Warrick

Every time I get a speeding ticket, yeah.

Hodges

All the hairs lifted off the victim's clothes were consistent with each other. There's a sample under the scope. The root is shaped like a spade which is indicitative of canine. The scale pattern is consistent with a golden retriever.

Sara

Oh, yeah the victims have a golden retriever.

Hodges

Well if you cracked that mystery at the scene, you would have saved me a lot of time. [sighs] I've been working like a dog.

Nick

You know studies have found that pet owners have lower stress levels, you should, you should check that out.

Hodges

Well, I had a hamster when I was growing up. My mother hated them she said they stank out my room. But I just loved to watch them spinning on their little wheels. One day I came home and they were gone. Somehow they'd gotten out of their cage.

Sara

How much did your mother hate them?

Hodges

They ran away.

Sara

Edith car in a Lexus neighborhood.

Sofia

We ran the plates, our girl doesn't live here, we're tracking her down.

Nick

Bitch on wheels, can't wait to meet her.

Sara

Sure, especially if Lois was an accomplice, or dare I say, a killer.

Greg

Well, I don't see homicide anywhere on her schedule.

Catherine

The canary diamond.

Sara

Wanna bet the birdie sings in the key of GSR?

Grissom

[seeing Hodges color in his grey hair with a marker pen]: Vanity, thy name is Hodges.

Hodges

This isn't what it looks like. I actually like my grey hair, the few that I have.

Sara

Hodges, don't you know that grey hair can be very attractive? [Grissom and Hodges look at her suggestively] The, uh, ring?

Sara

What were you doing on the roof?

That's what I do. Chad's Chimney Sweeps, I clean fireplaces and chimneys. I was out at that Sidley place about a month ago. You can call Chad. I remember that place. Man, that guy had one big-ass chimney.

Sara

I don't suppose you saw a body while you were there?

Look, I may be an ex-con, but even I would've dialed 9-1-1.

Sara

Do you have any physical evidence that would conclusively rule Hannah out as a suspect?

Nick

Well... yeah. She's 4"3 and 65 pounds. The crime just required more strength than she's got.

Catherine

How old is she?

Nick

12.

Warrick

In high school?

Nick

She's a high school senior. She skipped 6 grades. She's a prodigy.

Sara

Which means that she has the brains for murder.

You don't think I could have done it. Either one of you.

Sara

That's a big job... for a little girl.

Not if you have the right tools.

Sara

Smart kid like you, knows your brother is suffering, you feel bad, you wanna help... so you fabricate some evidence.

Uh, if you thought the evidence was fake I wouldn't still be in jail.

Sara

[reading what's on Hannah's dress] Rainbow party?

Nick

Yeah, it's a party game where the boys get the girls to wear different colored lipsticks while they have oral sex. The boy with the most colors wins. It's supposed to be trendy.

Sara

So much for "spin the bottle."

Hodges

Ah, teen lust. It starts with some chemistry, mess around with some biology. [Nick and Sara give each other look] And once you have some experience under your belt then you introduce the physics. Apparently chivalry is not dead. The bloody fingerprint tested positive for nonoxynol spermicide.

Nick

So much for the boyfriend.

Sara

If we can't pin this on Hannah or Marlon they could both walk.

Hodges

You could flip a coin.

Nick

Yeah, playin' football, chasin' girls, books when I wanted to learn somethin', what's not to like?

Warrick

Hey, guys.

Nick

Hey.

Warrick

This is Darcy, my wife Tina's niece.

Sara

Hey, Darcy. [Darcy kinda waves]

Nick

Yeah, you were right she's about Hannah's size.

Warrick

More or less.

Stop talkin' about me. [Warrick pulls an earbud out of her ear] Hey, that was the best part!

Warrick

That's what the pause button is for. It's time to work, it's child labor day.

Nick

The evidence says either one of them could have done it, but I think they were in it together.

Okay, I'll proceed against Marlon for the murder and bring charges against Hannah for conspiracy.

Another trial? You sure you want to go through all this again?

Hannah's parents and the community will have my ass if I don't.

Sara

Well, then maybe this is good news. I was just going over Sofia's notes from the original investigation. The night of the murder, Hannah and Marlon's parents had left them alone in the house. A pizza was delivered to the residence around 9:00 PM.

Nick

That's right around Stacy's TOD.

So, did anybody talk to the delivery guy?

Sara

Yes, and at the point that Sofia did, a month had passed. Now, the delivery guy's at the house all the time. He recognized photos of both kids, but he could not be sure which one answered the door that night.

Nick

But one of them did answer the door. [Sara nods] So that means they were not together at the time Stacy was killed.

Yeah. So much for conspiracy. We're right back where we started.

Where we are is in the crapper. Look, I have to disclose the cart. Defense is going to eat me alive.

Nick

Marlon's your guy. He's your guy, just because Hannah wasn't there doesn't mean she didn't help plan this.

Well, I sure hope it's Marlon, because he's the one we have on trial.

Nick

I stand by the case we filed.

I agree. The girl's just trying to protect him.

Sara?

Sara

This was more about brains than brawn. I think Hannah did it.

2 out of 3.

In my world, that's called an acquittal.

Sara

Hannah, with your gifts you could have done anything you could have wanted and you picked murder, you can't take that back.

You're worried how I'm gonna turn out?

Sara

Of course I am. I know it seems like a really long time, but in five years, the Stacy's of the world would have been behind you.

Let me guess? You were a smart kid in school, maybe you feel that we're a little bit alike?

Sara

There aren't many people like you.

That's what my parents always say too. The last four months all they cared about was the effect of the trial on me not Marlon. It's been that way ever since I was 14 months old and started spelling words with plastic letters. It's so unfair and nobody ever sees it. He doesn't deserve to go to jail. If I get convicted, what's the worst case scenario? I mean, I'll be out in five years with an undergraduate degree. There's no Son of Sam law in Nevada. That was ruled unconstitutional, so I'm free to write a book about all of this. The story will be worth millions. Freaks are always good box office.

Sara

You're not a freak.

When was the last time you had to sit down to be eye level with a murder suspect who was standing up?

Sara

Hannah West you are smart.

So I've been told.

Sara

But you are not smart enough to get away with murder.

I think I am. A lot of people are smart enough to get away with murder. You probably are too, but you have to be really smart to get people to think that something happened that never did.

Sara

What do you mean... exactly?

Please don't worry about me, I'm gonna be fine. [whispering in Sara's ear] I didn't kill Stacy. Marlon did.

Catherine

Anyone interested in the wedding DVD?

Yeah.

Catherine

Courtsey of Frank Rosetti. Owner of Cupid's Kiss. [(puts the DVD in)] All right, where do you wanna start?

The toast.

Catherine

Justifiable homicide?