Hello! It's me, Larry Lackapants, Arkansas Cheese master, soon to be the King & Queen of Cheese!
All S1
S1 E15Unfinished Business
CURSE YOU, LAUGHING PUDDLE! WHAT EVIL WELL DO! YOU! SPRING FROOOOOM!?!?!? Is anything in this cartoon ever going to make sense?!
The cartoon you just saw is true. The water in the Laughing Puddle is what scientists call THICK WATER!!! Meaning that it has molecules the size of WATERMELONS!!! TOO THICK TO RUN DOWN THE HOLE, but thin enough for our characters to pass through! If you ever get a chance to jump into Thick Water, DO IT!!! It feels really gooey! [laughs softly] The night club Boneless Chicken was performing at was shut down shortly after the making of this cartoon due to health code violations, ANY QUESTIONS!? Ladies? [puts hands to ears and makes a screeching noise] No, I didn't think so. That's the real end. [laughs]
Uh, I believe...
TTongue
He went that way.
[Humming as she runs the vacuum]
Chicken, why don't you take a hint from your sister and take out the garbage?
[Begins raging] Stop rattin' on me! Why do I always have to do everything around here?! [Breaks the T.V.] GET OFF MY CASE! [Banging his fists the walls in tune with his line]
Honey, talk to your son; I had just about all I can take. [Runs away, crying]
Listen here, Chief: when you're all grown up and living like some hopped up and crazy bachelor, you can sleep on a pile of garbage for all I care! But as long as you're living under my roof, you've got to live by my rules!
But-
That's it! I'll have no back-talk, Mister! You're grounded! [Chicken goes into his room and slams the door] [Cow opens the door and gasps]
Where are you going?
I am runnin' away to be a bachelor with cousin Boneless Chicken. No one tells him what to do; he just lays around his cool bachelor pad and does whatever he wants. Hasta la adiós, Cow. [Chicken hops out of the window]
Adiós, big brother. [She moos and then tears up, turning to her own bedroom] Oh, Chicken's a grown-up bachelor, and... I'm all alone! [Sits on the floor and cries] Ooh, I want to play grown-up bachelor, too! [Continues crying]
YOU'RE UNDER ARREST! For being a run away chicken. YOU TOO! Linda. FOR CONTRIBUTION TO THE DELQUINCY OF A CHICKEN! [laughing] OKAY, MEN! Get ready for your PUNISHMENT!
Geraldo Rearviewa, Super Cow critic.
TTeacher
Everybody just shut your porktraps for a minute!
Plastic surgery isn't just a sport, it's l a way of life.
Oh, I like your spirit. You're hired. Oh, by the way, who did your wattle?
Which one of you weenies is our victim-slash-volunteer?
Nip and tuck, short and curl, my brother Chicken is not a girl!
Couldn't have done this without you, Dr. Hiney.
Oh, please call me Dr. Hiney.
PPoliceman
Hey, it says here you're a plastic pipe salesman from bend Oregon!
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Cow and Chicken pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.