Red Guy quotes from Cow and Chicken

Red Guy

Superheroes, are your leotards starting to stink? Is your booties getting brittle? IS YOUR CAPE KIND OF CRUDDY?! Well, come on over to Hiney Beau Dry Cleaners, where if you're a superhero, your CLEANING is free!

Red Guy

[holds up a sweetcorn-based superhero costume in disdain] "Corn-Cobb Man"?! There's a lotta sick people in this town.

Red Guy

Got any scabs?! They could be worth gold.

Red Guy

Oh, we're flat out of time! Stay tuned after the commercial break! And maybe we'll show you the rest of the play! Or maybe we'll fill the time up with EVEN MORE COMMERCIALS!!! [laughs maniacally]

Red Guy

[as the Orthodontic Policeman] What are you people, a bunch of communists?

Red Guy

Walter Jeans-Begone, headhunter guide, at your service!

Red Guy

Hello! It's me, Larry Lackapants, Arkansas Cheese master, soon to be the King & Queen of Cheese!

Red Guy

The cartoon you just saw is true. The water in the Laughing Puddle is what scientists call THICK WATER!!! Meaning that it has molecules the size of WATERMELONS!!! TOO THICK TO RUN DOWN THE HOLE, but thin enough for our characters to pass through! If you ever get a chance to jump into Thick Water, DO IT!!! It feels really gooey! [laughs softly] The night club Boneless Chicken was performing at was shut down shortly after the making of this cartoon due to health code violations, ANY QUESTIONS!? Ladies? [puts hands to ears and makes a screeching noise] No, I didn't think so. That's the real end. [laughs]

Red Guy

YOU'RE UNDER ARREST! For being a run away chicken. YOU TOO! Linda. FOR CONTRIBUTION TO THE DELQUINCY OF A CHICKEN! [laughing] OKAY, MEN! Get ready for your PUNISHMENT!

Red Guy

Geraldo Rearviewa, Super Cow critic.

Red Guy

Plastic surgery isn't just a sport, it's l a way of life.

Red Guy

Oh, I like your spirit. You're hired. Oh, by the way, who did your wattle?

Red Guy

Which one of you weenies is our victim-slash-volunteer?

Red Guy

[riding his bike] Oh, nobody wants to play with me. I don't understand why!

Red Guy

Hello! I'm Bunny, your Flight Attendant! Oh, isn't it a great day to be HURLED THROUGH THE AIR, twenty-three billion feet above the Earth, with only a vewy, vewy thin sheet of aluminium between you and A TEN MINUTE SCREAMING DROP to an abrupt stop?