Leo Wyatt quotes from Charmed

Leo

Well, here comes your personal trainer from hell.

Piper

Literally.

Phoebe

Damn it! I am only going to say this once, the real world better start showing me some respect otherwise I'm going to stop saving it every week!

Leo

What happened?

Phoebe

I just had the worst job interview for a position that a monkey could fill, provided that the monkey could explain why it needed flexible work hours.

Piper

Are you siding with Paige now?

Leo

Hey, there's no sides. And, yes.

Piper

Do not go into that house. Did you hear me? I said do not go in. It is like talking to a wall!

Leo

She's got the Halliwell hearing.

Piper

Well, speaking for my Great Aunt Sylvia, who collect Hummells. When they have a hard time dealing with real people, figurines can be their best friends.

Leo

Yeah, but being socially awkward doesn’t land you in the Book of Shadows.

Leo

Okay, well then there's just one more thing that we need to tie up.

Piper

Oh, okay.

Phoebe

Uh, Leo what are you looking for?

Leo

Something very important.

Paige

Broken glass?

Leo

Broken glass that needs healing. Here it is. It's up to you.

Piper

Can you do it? Well, then do it. It looks like P3's back.

Leo

Yeah, she's home... She's just a little, indisposed at the moment.

Piper

Wait, you watch? What are you, like a peeping angel?

Leo

Wha.. I didn't see anything

Piper

Ahh

Leo

Alright just a little but how else am i supposed to protect her

Leo

This is who you are Paige, you know that. Why are you running from it?

Paige

Oh gee, I don't know. Being hunted by the Source, ducking the Furies and being shrunk by a psycho demon, not to mention being chased after by a bedtime story. I don't know why I wouldn't want the rest of my life to be just like that.

Leo

What the hell happened here?

Phoebe

Paige's past life almost killed us. That's what happened here.

Piper

Leo!

Phoebe

I thought you were a pacifist.

Leo

I didn't kill him, did I?

Piper

I gotta tell you, I find this side of you very sexy.

Leo

Really?

Piper

Yeah.

Phoebe

You've been holding out on us.

Piper

Are you really my husband?

Leo

Yes.

Piper

And that would make you two really my sisters?

Phoebe

Whether you like it or not!

Phoebe

Is something wrong.

Piper

No. Everything is just right.

Paige

Except my chair...

Piper

Yeah... which, ummm, I'll actually pay to replace.

Paige

Oh God no. It's not your fault. (Paige pauses) Or is it?

Piper

Actually, yeah... it is. I was just upset that there was yet another demon in our house, in our lives. And I know I should stop fighting it and just accept it, but...

Paige

Nah. It wasn't my favorite chair. Besides, it is kinda good to know I am not the only one who struggles with the idea of being a witch.

Phoebe

No, trust me, you are in good company.

Leo

Well, the good news is that you won't have to deal with the Source anytime soon, because Cole hurt him pretty bad.

Cole

Not bad enough though, he'll be back.

Phoebe

So. (Rubs her hands up and down Cole's chest) He's gone for now. First time in a long time. Maybe we should take advantage of that.

Cole

(Pulls Phoebe up against him) Why Ms. Haliwell, are you trying to seduce me?

Phoebe

Always.

Piper

Ewwww...

Paige

Okay... I'm just going to go to the store and get some milk or something...

Leo

(to Piper) You sure you're okay?

Piper

Yeah. I mean, I'm never going to stop wanting a normal life, but I think that's the one thing that actually keeps me sane.

Leo

Well, you deserve a normal life Piper. We both do. And maybe we'll get that once we banish the Source once and for all.

Piper

And who knows. Maybe one day I could have a baby shower of my own. What do you think?

Leo

Well in that case...

Piper

Oh!

Leo

Need to practice a little.

Piper

Leo!

Piper

I'm making this up as I go along, so power surge or no, you're going to have to be patient. Just like you're going to have to be patient on the marriage front.

Cole

I don't think that's any of your business.

Leo

You don't know sisters very well, do you?

Leo

Okay, so what exactly are you doing now?

Phoebe

Basking in the brilliance of our failure.

Phoebe

(to paige) You haven't told us and we've been dying to know. What happened in your past?

Paige

I found out that I wasn't responsible for the accident.

Piper

Of course you weren't.

Phoebe

Then what's wrong?

Paige

It just makes me sad that my parents will never see us, or what I've become.

Leo

Actually, that's not quite true.

Piper

Uh, Leo?

Leo

Let's just say that I owe Clyde now.

We know who you are honey, what you've become.

We've been with you every step of the way and we're so proud of you sweetheart.