Hey, Bones! Bones, Bones, just when you go over there, be nice. They're Canadians.
Are you referring to the broad generalization that Canadians are polite?
Yes, I am.
S6 E17The Feet on the Beach
More expertise is required instead of just feet.
Yeah, gosh. You really are not going to stop until this Canadian foot guy is paralyzed from head to toe.
Would you accept an agent who specialized in murders that only occurred in February?
Okay, that's different.
Not to me.
I'm glad that you apologized to the Canadian. I'm proud of you, Bones!
I didn't apologize.
I thought --
The word apology derives from the ancient Greek apologia, which means a speech in defense. When I defended what I said to him you told me that wasn't a real apology.
Why don't you think of a word that means you feel bad for making someone else feel bad.
Contrite! From the Latin contritus, meaning crushed by a sense of sin.
There it is! Contrite! I'm happy that you contrited to the Canadian.
Right. Would you like to hear some more things that I feel contrite about?
There's more?
Yes. I feel contrite that I think your socks are silly.
What?!
Also, I am contrite in the way that I think you are foolhardy in the way that you approach a cup of coffee.
How do I approach a cup of coffee?
You drink it without checking the temperature and then you complain all day that your tongue is burnt! I feel contrite that I think that's stupid.
Let's recap: foolhardy and stupid.
There's more.
Bones, you don't have to apologize for things that you think.
Oh!
Believe me, if we had to feel sorry for every single thought...
Like what?
Oh, believe me, I'm not going to fall down that path.
Cam got her daughter into Columbia behind her back.
'Cause she didn't want her to go to that little school up in Maine.
Oh. Wow. Honey, this is bad parenting. We will never do anything like this, promise me now.
What do I do now?
You give it to Cam.
I mean, do I say anything?
No. [shakes head] It is not your business.
Can I give her a disapproving look?
[snickers] Of course! [Hodgins gives her a "disapproving look"] That's a good one.
S6 E18The Truth in the Myth
Do you even own a TV?
Of course! It's in the closet.
[looks at a laughing Brennan] Now what?
Perhaps you could see your dark side if you mooned a mirror. [laughs] Because "moon" is a term that refers to exposing --
I know.
Get it? It's pretty clever, right?
It's clever. I'd laugh, but I'm afraid of driving off the road.
I understand.
Yeah, right? [smiles]
Safety first. I understand. [laughs]
You really had to volunteer us for this, huh?
Yeah! I thought coming out to the woods would be nice, you know? A little fresh air.
Honey, let me explain something to you: there's a human growing inside me. Vegging on the couch and eating pints of mint chocolate chip ice cream is actually all I want to do.
Recent studies show that mothers who gain excess weight during their pregnancy makes their babies more prone to childhood obesity.
Huh, that's interesting. I read a story that says that husbands who suggest their pregnant wives are fat are far more prone to being slugged by them.
Bones, at any time did you think that the chupacabra was real?
[laughs] No.
Then why did you believe that I saw the Yeti in Nepal?
Because what I said you saw was totally rational.
I never saw it. You see, what you did was rationally explain something that never happened.
You never saw the Yeti?
Or did I?
No, you didn't! You did? Are you trying to confuse me?
I might be!
Okay, what is your point?
That things are confusing. Just because you can explain something doesn't mean that it's explainable.
You mean explicable?
Sure, like us. We don't make any sense at all.
[chuckles] Don't be ridiculous. Yetis don't exist.
I was in Nepal. Rangers have a secure training base there. I was doing field exercises, about to rendezvous with my platoon and I saw it. About 30, 35 feet in front of me.
You were in the snow and in unfamiliar terrain, alone. Hallucinations are common.
It was over ten feet tall, it was huge. I looked straight in its eyes, pointed my rifle at it and it ran. This was no hallucination.
Booth, I'm sure you thought––
[cuts Brennan off] Hey, why don't you just trust me here? Why can't you just use that brilliant scientific mind of yours and at least admit the possibility of what I'm saying here is true.
You––you serious?
[resignedly] Just forget it. You know, you talk really good game, Bones, but when it comes down to it you're no different than people who were certain that the sun revolved around the earth.
[protests] That's not true.
Hmm.
Can I see your hands?
RRandy
My hands?
[irritated] Yeah, you know, the things under your arms there. [raises his hands] Your hands?
[toasting] Here's to stupidity and greed. The two elements that keep us employed.
S6 E19The Finder
[Booth's trying to get Brennan's ID back from Walter, both of them scuffling around the bar]
[calling for help when Booth pushes him down on the table] Leo! LEO!!
LLeo
You provoke this upon yourself. [rising to leave] Let me know how things turned out.[leaves]
IIke
Cold beer while you wait? [offering cold beer to Brennan who's watching the two guys scuffling]
[holds the beer bottle] Wait for what? [Booth and Walter still scuffling in the background]
IIke
The boys to get reacquainted. [cheers at Brennan's beer bottle and drinks]
Uh, pudge here is a..blind at one eye. [referring to person in the video]
[surprised] How can you tell?
Oh, it's the way he holds that scrap, or whatever it is to the light.
'Whatever it is' is a map...
[correcting Booth] It's a chart fragment, Mr Sherman.
Oh, uh, please...call me Walter. [smiles at Brennan, Brennan smiles back]
Seriously? Focus, can we? Thank you. Really? [gesturing and giving a look at Walter]
[looks at Booth and looks back at Brennan] Are you two sleeping together?
[chuckles] No! [looks at Booth]
No.
[to Brennan] Would you sleep with me? [Brennan looks at Walter shocked and amused]
[to Walter] You know what, you find the map, maybe you get a shot.[Brennan smacks Booth's arm] What? [mutters 'sorry' to Brennan]
[rising to leave, talking to Walter] Uh..can I get your cell number, please?
What? No! [panicking] Who..who told you to get my cellphone number?
Oh, oh...just relax, don't be paranoid.
In case, I obtained any..helpful informations from the victim's remains back in D.C.
IIke
[chuckling] Wh-What exactly you'd expect to find from a cracked-up bag of old bones?
Oh look, Bones has her thing, just like Walter here, alright? [leaving with Brennan]
Except my thing is real, not some imaginary finder power! [gesturing mockingly]
Oh! [laughs]
[Walter answers his cell in the toilet]
Who is this?
[at the other end with a surprised, confused look] It's..Dr Brennan at the Jeffersonian. Don't you have caller ID?
Caller ID doesn't tell you who's calling, it tells you the phone company wants you to think who's calling. Eh, did you guys find out that the victim was terminally ill?
Yes...His mitral valve is completely calcified. How did you know?
He had pyramids on the ceiling of his bedroom.
Wh..Pyramids indicate heart disease?
Of all the things humans created, pyramids stood the test of time best. Dying people invest all sorts of meaning in it. So..uh, did you find any signs of torture?
Yes, I did. Three fingers were dislocated shortly before death. It's possible, given his heart condition, the victim died with his secret intact.
Nope, he told the killer where to find the map.
What...Did you know where?
Poor man's safety deposit box. [looks at the victim's pawnshop's receipt]
I..I don't know what that means.
Pawnshop. You got anything else?
No, I'm done.
Yup, me too. [flushes the toilet; Brennan gives a confused look after hearing the flushing sound on the other end]
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Bones pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.