Maggie quotes from Blue Heelers

What, what are you doing?

Maggie

Well, I'm just getting into character.

Maggie

Why does every Christmas turn every driver into testosterone on wheels?

Yeah, and that's only the women.

Maggie

Oh, ha, ha.

Maggie

Have you talked to Gina yet?

What about?

Oh, Carols by Candlelight, Adam, what do you think?

Well, it's always been sort of one of my fantasies to get in there and sort of rescue you.

Maggie

Really?

Yeah.

Ah, I was dreaming about you, Doyle.

Maggie

I should've known to leave a sleeping detective well alone.

Maggie

PJ, I'm not the one you have to convince.

Yes, you are. You're the only one that matters.

Maggie

I've thought about this, and it wouldn't work.

I don't believe that.

Maggie

Yeah, you do...can we please keep this professional for both our sakes?

Tom

No, PJ, why don't you take all the credit?

Maggie

Or, how about, "Big head finally cracks it"?

Maggie

Yeah, that's a good idea, Adam. What's she like?

She's got amazing eyes.

Maggie

I'm Maggie Doyle.

Dash

Dash McKinley.

Maggie

Nice to meet you. You know, Adam's right. You do have very lovely eyes.

Maggie

Hey, oh listen - just a word of warning. We, ah, don't mention the Boss' weight.

Or his age.

Dash

You mean I've got to make special allowances because my Sergeant's a fat guy with a complex about his age...why doesn't someone tell him to go on a diet or something? He can use my bike if he wants to get some exercise. And if he's still a Sergeant at his age, then that is his problem.

Maggie

PJ, the only stress in your life is choosing what topping you're going to put on your pizza.

Now, that's important.

So, what's your favourite story?

Jack and the Beanstalk.

Maggie

Mother wants son to sell the family cow, he exchanges it for beans, he climbs a beanstalk, he tackles a giant.

Mate, um, yeah, there's this boy, right? And his name is Jack. Well, his mum wants him to get rid of this cow. She tells him to take the cow to this market. And when he goes to the market, he comes back, and he finds, he finds out that he's got beans in the bag! He's got plenty of beans, he's been conned!

What's conned?

Well, it means that the beans are in the bag instead of the money. Now, anyway, Jack's got this girlfriend, this very, very pretty - well, pretty skinny girl, called Olive Oil. And, ah, Olive Oil is, well, she's got this big grumpy man called Brutus and he's a big giant.

That's not the story!

Yeah, yeah, this is the story. That's the story I know. And now this Jack, you know, he's always, ah, eating this spinach because he's a friend of Popeye's. And, ah, and when he eats this spinach, he drops it down, really really big, swallows it down and after he does, he gets all this, he gets all this super human strength!

Maggie

Where do you think you're going with all your bits hanging out like that!

Oh, sorry, Margaret. Early Christmas present.

Maggie

Oh, no problem at all. I'll just curl up in the foetal position and forget that I've been buried alive, shall I?

Well, at least you've got good company!