Jonesy quotes from Blue Heelers

Jonesy

Hey Jo, come join us!

Jo

Sorry I can't, I have to study.

Tom

I don't know about you people, but I've got a home to go to and a dog to feed.

Jonesy

Is it that time already...

Tess

Oh, Constable.

Jonesy

You wouldn't want me to do it on over time, would you?

Tess

Just as long as you do it.

Jonesy

Is that an order?

Tess

If it has to be.

Jonesy

In that case, I obey.

Tess

Didn't your mother ever tell you curiosity killed the cat?

Jonesy

We never had a cat.

Jo

Jonesy, can you give me a hand to lift this thing?

Jonesy

Yeah...

You don't want me? Joanna, I am deeply offended.

Jonesy

PJ, can you blame her? I'll see you in the car.

Alright, Schwarzneggar!

Tess

Hi.

Jonesy

Merry Christmas.

Tess

Yeah, you too.

Jonesy

I didn't know what to bring, so...

Tess

Anything's fine.

Jonesy

So...I didn't bring anything.

Tess

Oh! That's fine too.

Tess

What are you looking for?

Jonesy

Mistletoe.

Tess

Get out!

Jonesy

Merry Christmas!

Tess

I'm sorry about Meg.

Jonesy

I'm not...she blamed you.

Tess

Me?! Why?

Jonesy

She reckons you were jealous.

Tess

Of what?!

Jonesy

Of me and her.

Tess

Well, that comes from living in a fantasy world for too long.

Jonesy

She reckons you fancy me, Sergeant.

Chris

So when will I get to see G-I Jonesy in action?

Jonesy

The body can't take it anymore, Chris.

Chris

Weak!

Jonesy

Thanks!

Is this the start of a new relationship or just comfort from a friend?

Jonesy

Just comfort.

Jo

Thanks mate.

In that case, I think it's my job.

Tess

Do you want to have a look?

Jonesy

Thought you'd never ask.

I'm sorry, I didn't realise.

Jonesy

What?

That you were the father.

Jonesy

No, we're just good friends.

Do you want to know the sex of the baby?

Jonesy

Yes.

Tess

No.

Jonesy

Nah...

Tess

Print him out a copy if he wants. He can frame it.

Jonesy

I guess it's a shame we're not more like seahorses.

Tess

Seahorses?!

Jonesy

Yeah. It's the male that gets pregnant.

Tess

Probably the only male anything that knows what it's like to be dismissed as an eratic, hormonal half-wit every time it opens it's mouth.

Jonesy

Don't call me pal, mate.

Don't call me mate, pal.

So it really looked like a flying saucer?

Jo

It was full on and I didn't even have the mushrooms.

Jonesy

This is when it pays to read your stars signs. Will be abducted by aliens, so pack undies!

Wonder what's Rochelle's was?

Jo

Yeah, Sag.

Jonesy

Here it is. Something new will happen in your life. Maybe a new man. Expect a trip to outerspace! Expect a bumpy ride!

You're all so hilarious.

So what did your star sign say yesterday, PJ?

Jo

Expect a grumpy mood and a closed mind.

All your minds are so open I can hear the wind just whistling through!

Jo

PJ!