Muffy Crosswire quotes from Arthur

I lost them. At home I think. It's very harder than ever to see without my glasses.

Why didn't you just wear them?

I didn't need them. I know this school at the back of my own hand. Boy's room is the third door from this corner, right?

Yeah, right.

See, why didn't I need them?

See you in class! [walks on]

Arthur passes Mr. Marco who comes out of a door with Mr. Haney

Mr. Haney

This is why I lock the exams, and...

Mr. Marco

Oh, well, the examination was better than I thought it would be. Still, in all, I think that we're going to have to go over...

[counts the doors but misses the one the teachers came out of] First door. Second. Third. [walks into girl's room by mistake and sees Francine and Muffy talking to each other]

I said, if I'm not batting cleanup, I'm not playing.

Francine?!

FMFrancine and Muffy

Aah!

AMArthur, Muffy, and Francine

What are you doing in here?!

This is the girls' room! Get outta here!

Huh?

The door hits Arthur in the back as Sue Ellen, Jenna and Maria come in. The door is seen from the outside.

GGirls

Augh! It's a boy! Get him out!

(Everybody hears the screaming and wonders what it is.)

Get me out of there!!

(The girls run out. Arthur slowly follows and finds everybody staring at him in disapproval.)

Augh! (he drops his lunch box) Uh-oh....

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Arthur and Francine ride their bikes to Muffy's House. When they get there, they see duck workers rolling out new lawn. A man with a hedge trimmer walks past them.

FAFrancine and Arthur

(gasp)

You think you can do it, Arthur?

I've got to, Francine! [surreptitiously walks over to the mailbox and puts in an envelope]

Muffy

Are you sure this is going to be done in time?

CMrs. Crosswire

Muffy, why don't you go check the mail?

Muffy

Okay. Maybe there's something for me!

Muffy's coming!

Muffy comes running

[hides behind a tree] Oh no! If Muffy catches me, my entire birthday will be ruined!

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[catches up with Buster outside Lakewood Elementary] Buster, can you come to my party?

Are you kidding?! Of course!

[give Binky and invitation at his locker] Binky Barnes.

Me?!

Yeah, and Francine. [gives an invitation to Francine as she passes]

Oh boy! We can play spin the bottle!

Arthur and Buster look embarrassed

[whispers] It's not too late to uninvite her.

No, I'll just do the recycling that morning so that there'll be no bottles in the house. [meets Muffy who is also holding invitations] Will you come to my party?

Muffy

Sure! When is it?

Saturday afternoon! I can't wait!

PSPrunella, Sue Ellen and Fern

[gasp]

Muffy

This Saturday afternoon?! But that's when I'm having my party! [hands out invitations to Arthur’s friends] I would've handed out my invitations two days ago, but they came back late from the printer.

[hands out invitations to the girls] Can't you change your party to another day?

Muffy

Are you kidding?! The rock band and Pickles the clown have been booked for months!

You got Pickles?! He did my cousin's wedding! He's a genius!

SStudents

Ooooh, Pickles!

But I can't change my party either! All my relatives are coming from Ohio!

SStudents

Ooooh, Ohio!

Muffy

Well then, everybody will just have to choose which party to attend.

Everyone looks at their invitations.

What are you thinking about?

About whose party to go to. Why? What are you thinking about?

Where's Ohio?

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Arthur, Buster, Binky and Brain are playing with a basketball during recess

As boys, we have to stick together! [passes the ball to Binky]

The rabbit's right as rain!

BBrain

I agree! We all go to Arthur's party! [he, Buster and Binky join hands]

What about the girls?

Ah, who needs girls?

Muffy, Francine, Prunella, Sue Ellen and Fern are nearby at the jungle gym

Muffy

Who needs boys? Anyone who doesn't come to my party can't be my friend anymore!

But a party won't be fun without the boys!

Muffy

Are you my friend or not!

A teacher calls the kids with a whistle. There’s a rope lying on the ground

CGCoach Grimslid

Come here kids! Let's choose sides for a tug of war! Muffy, you be one captain! Buster, you be the other! Muffy, choose your first player!

Muffy

This team looks good to me!

That's fine!

CGCoach Grimslid

Okay then, the team that pulls the other team over this line wins! [blows her whistle]

KKids

[starts pulling and strains]

Muffy

Who needs boys?! Pull! Who needs boys?! Pull!

Who needs girls?! Pull! Who needs girls?! Pull!

Come on guys, pull! [ties the rope to his waist and leans back. Prunella ties the other end to the jungle gym. Suddenly the rope breaks and all kids fall down]

I guess nobody wins.

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Boys and girls sit at separate tables in the Powers’ ice-cream shop.

KKids

(chatter)

Francine and Arthur both walk to the counter.

Everybody's really starting to hate each other.

This is just terrible Arthur!

BMBuster, Muffy, Sue Ellen and Fern

[angrily blows raspberry]

I wish you could come to my party.

I promised Muffy. How can I go to both? What's a party without boys?!

Wait a minute! I have an idea! [whispers in her ear]

That's a great idea, Arthur!!

[covers Francine's mouth] Shhh! But we have to keep it secret!

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Arthur and Francine ride through town on their bikes and put invitations in several mailboxes.

Okay, it's in!

[checks a clipboard] All that's left is....

AFArthur and Francine

Muffy!

The opening scene at the Crosswires’ gate is shown again

You think you can do it, Arthur?

I've got to, Francine! [walks to the mailbox]

(gasps) Duck!

Arthur ducks and an anthropomorphic duck worker walks by.

DWDuck Worker

(quacks)

Arthur hides until the worker has gone back through the gate. Then he runs to the mailbox and is about to put his note in when he hears Muffy.

Muffy

Are you sure this is going to be done in time for my big party?

CMrs. Crosswire

Muffy, why don't you go check the mail?

Muffy

Okay. Maybe I got more presents!

Arthur quickly puts in the note.

Muffy's coming!

Muffy runs towards the mailbox and Arthur hides behind a tree. Francine covers her eyes.

Muffy

[gets the invitation and runs back through the gate] Mommy! I got a note from Arthur!

Arthur is not to be seen. Francine scratches her head. Arthur peeps out of some rolls of lawn.

(giggles)

[comes out covered in mud] Let's go!

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Arthur opens the door to Muffy.

Muffy

I'm here for my present!

The kids leap out of hiding.

KKids

Surprise!

I told you your present was too big to carry.

What's a birthday party without all of your friends?

The kids put on party hats. They play limbo. Binky falls on his back while Kate easily crawls under the stick. Mr. Read lifts her up in victory. Buster tries to smash a clown-shaped piñata. So does Francine, but the piñata merely swings

RMr. Read

Maybe I better help you out. [hits the piñata to no avail]

KKids

(chuckle)

Mr. Read hits the piñata with a hammer. The kids continue to party.

The kids gather around a birthday cake.

Muffy

This is great! We should do this every year! Thank you everybody!

RMrs. Read

Next year we'll do it at your house.

Time to open your presents! I picked this out especially for you! [gives the present to Arthur]. You have to promise me you'll use it right away!

Arthur: Sure, I can't wait! [unpacks a box in a bottle]

It's a spin the bottle game.

BBoys

(gasp)

Let me show you how it works. [spins the bottle. It points to Pal and he licks her face].

KKids

(laugh)

Francine looks annoyed but then pets Pal.

Outside, Mr. Read tries to open the piñata with a chainsaw.

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(At the gym, Binky and Arthur are fighting, but Arthur loses.)

You better buy some clothespins. Babies never stop pooping! (evilly begins to laugh, and the imagination scene fades in, where the new baby has a dirty diaper.)

(holding his nose) Can we open a window, please.

ASArthur's Mom

What?

(loudly) I said, open a window!

(Arthur’s Mom contorts her face and grunts. The smell grows worse and Arthur holds his nose)

(A firetruck passes by the Read house. We see the firefighters hold their noses.)

So you can forget about smelling good. (laughs)

(Later, he and his friends are at the pool.)

Muffy

Poor Arthur. In a few months, he'll be changing all those stinky diapers! (plugs her nose before jumping into the pool, causing the screen to be splashed by water effects)