Cordelia[to Groosalug] You're in charge now. And you've got a long road ahead. Slavery has ended, but reconstruction has just begun.
What is this "reconstruction?"
Cordelia
Gunn, you wanna field this?
It means, saying people are free, don't make em free. You've got races that hate each other. You got some folks getting work they don't want, others losing the little they had. You're looking at social confusion, economic depression and probably some riots. Good luck.
Cordelia
You'll do fine.
It worries me...but not as much as- do you have to go, Majesty?
Cordelia
I don't want to. I'm really gonna miss your eyes, and the "Majesty" thing. But I have a job to do back home. It was really fun being your princess. [kisses him]
CCrowd
[bowing as Cordelia walks by] Your Majesty.
Should people be bowing in a free society?
Cordelia
These things take time.
[A.I come back from Pylea and find Willow sitting at the Hotel with a sad and serious look on her face]
[Angel and co. come back from Pylea and find Willow sitting at the Hyperion Hotel with a sad and serious look on her face]
Are-are you sure about that?
Cordelia
Trust me. Tacos everywhere. And soap.
Yo, that portal-jumping is a fun ride. We sell it to a theme park, we could get paid.
Okay, can I say it? I wanna say it.
Wesley. Say what?
There's no place like-- Willow?
Cordelia
What's...?
Cordelia
How's Fred?
She's alright, considering. We talked over what happened, and I think she'll becoming out of her room any decade now.
Cordelia
[chuckles] And how are you?
Cordelia
And don't say "okay." Angel, please, I know you. Never since you've came back from your grief trip I can tell that something's not right. And-and obviously, it's not. Buffy's dead, and I don't mean to diminish that. I miss her too. I just wanna say, I know that James with all his Romeo and Juliet madness, opened up a lot of wounds for you, but you'll be okay.
Cordelia
Then, what's the problem?
That I'm okay. That losing Buffy didn't kill me, that I could deal with it. In all those years, no one ever mattered. Not like she did. And now she's gone... forever.
Cordelia
And you'll still here.
Yeah. I just feels like I'm betraying her somehow.
Cordelia
No. If you were a loser, if you were some sick obsessed vampire, that you'd go to a Snod demon, or whatever and get your heart cut out. But you're not. You're a living, breathing... well, living anyway, good guy, whose still fighting and trying to help people, and that's not betraying her, that's honoring her.
Cordelia
I'm Cordelia. I don't think. I know, okay?
Cordelia. So, can we get back to work now?
Yeah, sure. There's work?
What do you know about Nester demons?
Well, they-they like to live in the walls of people's homes. They hatch several times a year, and don't you have to kill their queen or something?
Yeah. And if you don't, they infest again, worse than ever.
Cordelia
We killed a bunch of them in Hancock Park a couple of months ago.
I don't think we got the queen.
Cordelia
I'm right as rain.
I never understood that saying-right as rain. How is rain right? Or wrong for that matter? Okay, I suppose if there's a flood it's wrong, and speaking of floods, or just being overwhelmed, what's it like to have a vision?
Cordelia
Wow. Y'know, next to you, I am downright linear.
Cordelia
Look, this is really urgent. I know Lorne pays you to cast this spell. What will it take for you to lift it?
TSTransuding Sisters
(in sequence) This is not a debt you can pay.
Cordelia
(insulted) You don't know that. My credit has been very good this last year.
TSTransuding Sisters
(in sequence) Only Angel is equipped to make good on this debt.
Cordelia
Angel. (makes raspberry noise) I don't know. You know, for a guy who's a couple of centuries old, not very big with the wise investing. (pause, then understanding) And when you say "equipped", that isn't what you mean, is it?
TSTransuding Sisters
(together) Mmmm...Angel.
Cordelia
Got it. And eww.
Cordelia
(on Fred) She's got the big puppy love. I mean, who wouldn't? You're handsome and brave and heroic, emotionally stunted, erratic, prone to turning evil, and let's face it, a eunuch.
Hey! How can you...I'm not a eunuch.
Cordelia
Angel, it's just a figure of speech.
Cordelia
I just mean that sex is a no-no for you because of the whole "if you know perfect bliss you'll turn evil curse." Really no cure for that, is there?
Hey. How's your head? S-Sorry about all that...
No, I gather I had it coming.
Fred, I've been meaning to talk to you about something.
Mm-hmm. Okay. Is this about how you're not like other men... what, with that curse and all? And, how you're really fond of me, but that's as far as it goes?
Cordelia explained it to me. She said you'd probably just screw it up.
Oh, she did, did she? Well, she's probably right. What?
It's like something out of Fitzgerald. [sighs] The man who can have everything but love. Well, maybe in some ways, you're better off, because love is... Well, in a way, it's everything. But it's also heartache and dissappointment. And those are good things to avoid.
Cordelia
Angel, Willow's on the phone. She's alive. Buffy's alive.
Cordelia
Lemme break it down for you, Fred.
CACordy [as Buffy]
Oh, Angel, I know that I am a Slayer, and you're a vampire and it would be impossible for us to be together, but--
WAWesley [as Angel]
But... my gypsy curse sometimes prevents me from seeing the truth. Oh, Buffy...
CACordy [as Buffy]
Yes, Angel?
WAWesley [as Angel]
I love you so much, I almost forgot to brood.
CACordy [as Buffy]
And just because I sent you to Hell that one time doesn't mean that we can't just be friends.
WAWesley [as Angel]
Or possibly more?
CACordy [as Buffy]
Gasp! No! We mustn't!
WAWesley [as Angel]
Kiss me!
CACordy [as Buffy]
Bite me!
[entering] How 'bout you both bite me?
I think those two pretty much summed it up.
Cordelia
(on Fred's invention) God, I really wish she wouldn't leave her toys laying around.
Ooh, pretty wicked looking toy.
I'll say. It almost looks like a spring-loaded decapitation device.
Cordelia
Or it makes toast. With her you never know.
Cordelia Chase, right? You came here to gloat?
Cordelia
I can do that anywhere. Are you going to invite me in? Oh, wait. I'm not a vampire. (walks in)
(sarcastically) Please, come on in.
Cordelia
I want you to tell me about Billy. Everything you didn't tell Angel. I want you to help me stop him.
And what makes you think I'm going to do that?
Cordelia
Well, your face, for starters.
I know the risks of my job, and I accept them.
Cordelia
Then why were you crying five minutes ago. (Lilah looks surprised) There's not a thing about badly re-applied mascara that I don't know.
I am not Lindsay McDonald. I don't switch sides whenever it gets tough. And since when is this your job? I thought Angel was the Dark Revenger.
Cordelia
Angel feels responsible for this guy because he brought him back from hell. I feel responsible because he did it to save me. You, who are actually responsible for the entire thing, feel nothing at all, because you are a vicious bitch.
Cordelia
Please, I was you. With better shoes.
Cordelia
Fall collection?
Cordelia
He's widened the heel.
Cordelia
That won't work with pink.
The pink is out this spring.
Cordelia
Billy makes people crazy.
Not all people. Just men. He brings out a primal misogyny in them. Turns them into killers.
Cordelia
Then why didn't he do it to Angel?
Cordelia
Yes, right before he escaped from the cops. (Lilah laughs) What's so witty?
Billy's touch work's differently on different men. Some lose their mind in an instant. Others, can take hours. Gee, I sure hope Angel isn't starting to feel testy.
Cordelia
You better hope it.
I know. I've seen his dark side.
Cordelia
You really haven't. (Lilah looks nervous) I have to find Billy.
And I'm going to help you why?
Cordelia
You know that guy you hired to hack into my visions? What he did to me? You know what it felt like? I was cut, torn up, my face disfigured and burning with pain every second, not knowing if it was going to end or just get worse until I died.
Cordelia
It's not the pain. It's the helplessness. The certainty that there is nothing you can do to stop it. That your life can be thrown away in an instant by someone else. He doesn't care. He'll beat you down until you stay down, because he doesn't even think of you as alive. No woman should ever have to go through that, and no woman strong enough to hold the mantle of vicious bitch would ever put up with it. Where is Billy going?
[Angel stares at Cordelia, working up the nerve to confess his feelings for her.]
Cordelia
Why are you looking at me like that?
Cordelia
Okay. It's getting creepy now.
I was just thinking about things. People. You know, how they relate. Take you and me, for instance. We're very different. Very different. Obviously. [points at Cordy] Human, [points at self] vampire. [points at Cordy] Woman, [points at self] man... pire.
Cordelia
Has someone been putting vodka in your blood?
[chuckles] See? You're funny! And I, well I get off a good one every once in a while, but you...
Cordelia
Angel, are you trying to say you love me?
Cordelia
I love you too.
Cordelia
[calling into Wesley's office] Angel loves me! I love him!
Cordelia
You guys love us and we love you!
WFWesley, Fred, Gunn
[offscreen, in chorus] We love you, Angel!
Cordelia
They were all saying it earlier. Just in case this prophecy comes true and we all die. You're not gonna want a hug, are you?
[Darla starts groaning in pain after Cordelia punches her.]
Cordelia
Oh, come on, tough girl. You're a vampire. A punch in the nose shouldn't hurt that much.
Not aaow her nose. She's having contractions!
[Darla screams]
Angel · 793 quotes
