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S1 E2

ALF · Season 1, Episode 2

ALF, Burglar and others in “Strangers in the Night”

[voiceover] And then it happened. I was sitting on the bed and when it happened. He came into my life. [a man comes in through the window] At first I thought it was Santa Claus. Then it soon dawned on me, Santa probably wouldn't smell like cheap wine. Besides, he was beginning to fill up his bag with stuff that didn't belong to him. I was scared stiff. But I knew I had to do something. I realized for that moment I was the man of the house. Excuse me, sir. May I have a word with you?

Who said that?

I did. Can you take some constructive criticism? What you're doing here is wrong.

It must be one of them talking dolls.

Oh, yeah? Ever have a talking doll rip out your voice box?

[the burglar screams falls down to the ground from the Willie and Kate's bedroom]

[gets scared as Willie comes] Oh, Mr. Tanner, thank God you're home! This evening has been a nightmare.

So I heard. [picks up the stick as Kate and Lynn come home] No! No! Mrs. Ochmonek.

I don't know what's going on here? I hope the police get here soon!

Police?

Weird things have been going on in this house all night, especially in your bedroom.

Lynn, take Mrs. Ochmonek to the kitchen and give her some tea.

Okay, mom. [takes Raquel to the kitchen] Come on, Mrs. Ochmonek. Would you prefer herbal tea or regular?

I prefer scotch.

[Willie and Kate run up to their room]

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