Deke Shaw quotes from Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.

Daisy

When we were on Krylor, you took something.

Davis

You knew about that?

Daisy

I was running that mission. I knew everything. Also, you're not smooth like, at all.

Davis

I stole a pen.

Deke

A pen?

Davis

A space pen. I thought it was cool. Aliens write things down. I did not know that.

Daisy

He's clear. And also ridiculous.

Deke

When the monoliths exploded, it opened this Fear Dimension. I fought a Kree, and I saw my mother, which was horrible, and you got married in a forest a few floors down. That was nice. The other you.

Fitz

It actually manifested living things? Flesh and blood?

May

Yes. Coulson went in, sealed it up.

Fitz

Maybe it wasn't a dimension. Izel said the monoliths had the power to create. Now, we know that one monolith was "space", another was "time". What if the third one was "creation"?

May

That's where our fears came from?

Fitz

Yeah, think about it. The physical stones blew apart. That doesn't... It doesn't mean...

Deke

...Doesn't mean that the energy went away. It could... The light could just be uncontained monolith energy.

Fitz

Exactly. Exactly. We're looking for a link. That could be it.

May

O-Okay, so you're saying that, when Coulson went in there with it...

Fitz

It's possible that the three energies combined to create another Coulson through space and time on some other planet years ago. And he was left there when our Coulson sealed the Gravitonium device.

May

If that's true, he doesn't know it.

Deke

Just saying, the other you thought it was a Fear Dimension.

Fitz

Yeah, well, he wasn't the smart one.

Fitz

You copied tech that you never understood in the first place, and now we've got bugger-all to show for it!

Deke

We've got bugger lots. We are close.

Fitz

[To Simmons] You said our grandson was a delight.

Simmons

He's a work in progress.

Deke

Oh, you know what? You are just jealous that I came up with the big solve.

Fitz

No B.S. Foundation can hide the fact that you built this company not to advance science but to get rich!

Deke

I built this company because no one liked me!

Simmons

Deke, he didn't mean...

Deke

Yes, he did. I built it because I've never belonged anywhere, because the place that I'm from doesn't even exist anymore and because all of my friends are gone. And the woman that I gave lemons to thinks that I'm a loser, so I went out into the world to try and be what everybody wants me to be, and she still thinks that I'm nothing! And my best friend turned out to be a spy, and my girlfriend turned out to be a psychopath.

Simmons

Snowflake was not good for you.

Deke

I was talking about Sequoia. Oh. I mean, the family that I do have wants nothing to do with me.

Simmons

Deke, we care about you. We do.

Deke

You say that and you try to be nice, but you didn't even want me to know that Fitz died.

Simmons

I wanted to spare you the pain.

Deke

But I could've shared that with you. I could've helped. Even my own grandparents think I'm a joke.

Mack

Agent Shaw, you got your orders.

Deke

Stay here and take out any zombies while you go Quake Sarge back to whatever planet he was barfed out on.

Daisy

You sure you can handle the gunplay?

Mack

Oh, he's been practicing his shooting. You should see his video game.

Deke

Navigating the past happens to be my specialty.

Yo-Yo

Last time, you got stupid drunk and ended up in jail.

Deke

That's not true. I was pleasantly drunk. It was hilarious.

Daisy

He'll be fine. It's Prohibition, so alcohol's illegal anyway.

Deke

It's what? Who would think that's a good idea? Even the Kree let us make our own boot juice.

Daisy

That's what I'm worried about. The butterfly effect. Just us being here, walking down the street, we could've already changed the course of events.

Deke

Yeah, the butterfly effect is just one aspect of the multiverse branch theory. Personally, I subscribe to the Time-Stream idea.

Mack

Let me guess. That's the one that lets you do whatever you want.

Deke

Okay. Imagine time as a stream, right? And we were sticks that were thrown into it. The water, it... it moves us... it moves around us.

But it ends up in the same place.

Deke

Right. Now, too many sticks thrown in and that will create what's called a dam, and... and that'll change the direction of the water forever, and that's bad. So as long as we can avoid that, we should be able to splash around a little bit and we're all good.

Mack

Okay, I know where this is going. Agent Shaw, you will not be filing any patents. Is that understood?

Deke

In the '50s, were women allowed to drive?

Yo-Yo

Yes, of course. Why would you...

Deke

I'm sorry! I don't know. I mean, we were just in the '30s and they were really stylish, but it was... so sexist and racist. But the '50s, though... are still pretty sexist and racist.

Yo-Yo

It always gets better, just never fast enough.

Deke

And some things never change.

Yo-Yo

Can't hurt to try, though.

Deke

Sometimes you punch the bag, sometimes the bag punches you, am I right? I get that Mack wants me to do combat training before I return to the field, but seriously, I got kidnapped by a Hydra boss one time.

Simmons

I don't think Freddy will be bothering you anymore, considering his funeral was three years ago.

Deke

Good riddance. Not that I was... rooting for his death, but kinda. Did you hear anything from Bobo? Bobo... or grandpappy, whatever you want to call him.

Simmons

Oh, Fitz. No, I haven't heard. But, um, even if I had, I couldn't disclose...

Deke

Right, because the Chronicoms will probe our brains and blah, blah, blah, and it's very dangerous, no one can know... I get it.

Simmons

We'll be reunited soon.

Deke

Well, I hope so. Because if you and Fitz don't... bump lemons... so to speak... You know, my mom is never going to exist, and then I won't be born... again. I think. But, honestly, I've made so many mistakes in my life, I wouldn't mind a chance at a little do-over.

Simmons

Wouldn't it be easier to prevent the mistakes through, say, preparation?

Deke

Taking the hint. Letting you get back to work. Bye, Nana.

Simmons

Forget what you saw. Enoch is a friend.

Deke

No, no, what I just saw was Creepytown, USA, population... the... the two of you. No, no. I want answers... real ones.

Simmons

He was fixing my memory so we can fix the ship.

Deke

Wait a second. Do you... Do you not know how to fix the time machine that you are currently ripping apart?

Simmons

You cannot imagine how impossible it was to track the Chronicoms through time. But Fitz and I found a place where all their moves could be observed. And to guide us, Fitz stayed there. He is completely exposed, and they will kill him if they find him, so no one can know his location.

Deke

But you knew.

Simmons

Yes. I designed a biological implant to suppress my memories. I named her "Diana." She's adorable, and we're inseparable. Literally.

Deke

But then you won't remember how to find Fitz again.

Simmons

I'm worried I might. Diana is acting up, and I'm... I'm forgetting the things I'm supposed to know, and more dangerously, I'm remembering the things I'm not.

Deke

Um, yeah, E-Enoch, I'm sorry... about before. I-I didn't realize that things were so dire.

Simmons

And... ?

Deke

And... you are a valued member of our family.

Enoch

That is the greatest compliment one could be paid. Apology accepted.

Deke

This isn't a cover band. The band is a cover. Director, I want to introduce you to The Deke Squad. That's Roxy Glass. She runs covert ops and tactical. Kind of the brains of the operation. Alright, y'all ready? Tommy and Ronnie Chang, a.k.a. The Chang Gang. Both masters of disguises, not to mention total honey pots. Olga Pachinko... resistance from the Balkans. Only speaks limited English, though she is fluent in the international language... demolitions. And finally, there's Cricket. Cricket's... well, I mean, mostly, we just really needed a drummer.

Mack

Wait, wait, wait. Didn't you tell me that dude was shady?

Deke

Yeah, but that was before I found out he had a steady job.

Mack

Doing what?

Deke

Selling coke. Although, I've never seen him drink any.

Mack

Look, I appreciate the effort you put in. I really do. But this is terrible spy-craft to be this high-profile.

Deke

Exactly. That's the whole point. Think about the practical applications. We move freely from town-to-town. Big cases of high tech "equipment" are part of the gig. And any strange behavior, they just chalk it up to drugs.

Cursed machines will not lick defeat unless we slay head robot.

Deke

I think you mean "taste" defeat, but props on the English.

Deke

Last semester, you got straight A's, you racked up the high score on Ms. Pac-Man and you cried buckets when you read Where the Red Fern Grows.

Mack

That stays between us.

Deke

Not making any promises.

Mack

Uncle Marcus's car looks nicer than I remember.

Deke

You don't say.

Mack

How are Reuben and I... doing with, uh... You know.

Deke

Still hard. I mean, they were your parents. I don't think that pain ever goes away completely. But every day's a little easier, and your Uncle Marcus has been great. I think that you and Reuben are even closer in this timeline. Now, remember, you're just a friend from my band, okay?

Mack

Yeah, okay, but what instrument do I play?

Deke

I don't know. I was thinking maybe... harmonica?

Mack

Oh, what? Harmonica? Oh, hell no. No. No, no, no, no. I'm a sax man all the way.

Deke

Of course the big man plays the sax. Alright, I'm into that, but we're gonna have to get you a couple lessons. It's got to be authentic.

Deke

Stand back. There's gonna be a big surge of electricity. Electricity's dangerous.

Do I look like a Neanderthal to you?

Enoch

I spent time with a tribe of Neanderthals. Agent Sousa does not resemble one. He lacks the characteristic brow ridges.