Xena quotes from Xena: Warrior Princess

Gabrielle

Xena! (Xena emerges from the lake)

Xena

He's in the Elysian fields.

Gabrielle

You will be together one day.

Xena

We'll never be apart. He's in here,(taps her heart twice)forever

Xena

We need to talk.

Autolycus

Talk is cheap; I have an expensive ear.

Xena

What do you think you're doing? Concubine?

Autolycus

Oh, come on. Do you really think those people would believe someone like Lord Sintares would have someone like you without, well, having someone like you?

Xena

Just you watch it.

Where´s your woman, did she drown?

Autolycus

No, no, she didn´t drown. She should be here momentarily. She´s nearly conquered territory, you know how it is...

Virgin grounds, whoa.

Autolycus

Yeah, you see, a woman´s chastity is like a new hat. A beautiful thing that´s...(Xena appears)... going to kill me. Oooh, what took you so long my dear, finishing up my laundry?

Xena

Yes, you left something hanging on the line.

Xena

Magmar told me that his boss has a big ego, almost as big as yours.

Autolycus

Nothing is as big as mine.

Gabrielle

By the Gods!

Xena

What is it?

Gabrielle

You are beautiful!

Gabrielle

I'm great. I can't see but I'm good.

Xena

Try using both eyes.

Gabrielle

Oh, oh yeah that's better.

Xena

Think you can stand?

Gabrielle

You mean I'm not?

Xena

Have I made myself clear?

Gabrielle

No. You're a little fuzzy around the edges so you keep trying, you'll get there.

Xena

What are you doing here? I thought I told you to wait for me at the cave.

Gabrielle

I did and then this rock told me I had to come find you.

Xena

The rock spoke to you?

Gabrielle

Well, yeah, I mean his voice was a little gravely but I understood...

Gabrielle

Did I hurt you?

Xena

No, no, loving every minute of it.

Xena

Give up on me, Ares. You´re not my father.

Ares

What is a father, Xena? A man who guides you, who teaches you how to live your life. I did all for you. And I´ll never let you go.

Xena

He seeks a man for the horse.

Gabrielle

He stole it, didn't he?

Xena

Nope.

Gabrielle

Is he your father?

Xena

All I know is that he didn't lie about the horse.

Xena

[Whistles]

Gabrielle

Uh-oh. I hate it when you do that. I have to practice.

Xena

Not on my horse. I wish the two of you would just get along.

Gabrielle

It's not like we're at constant war or anything. Argo doesn't like me.

Xena

(to Argo) Sometimes you have to have patience with things that annoy you.

Gabrielle

Oh, I never said she annoyed me.

Xena

I wasn't talking to you.

Gabrielle

Oh, funny-- very, very funny.

Gabrielle

Riding? That would mean Argo. No-- she doesn't like me.

Xena

She doesn't hate you. I thought you had a pony when you were young.

Gabrielle

I did. His name was Tympani.

Xena

Did you leave Tympani with your sister?

Gabrielle

No-- actually-- he got very sick one day, and-- why, I thought he would get better, but-- it's just what happens with things that you love. Sometimes they just leave you.

Gabrielle

You want to talk about it?

Xena

What?

Gabrielle

Cirra.

Xena

It was just another village to conquer. Nothing out of the ordinary. A fire broke out and I don't know if it was my men or just an accident but there was a strong wind and those flames just swept through that town like a wave of death. And the people were huddled in their houses because they were afraid of my army. That was the one time that my army was responsible for the death of women and children. And there was just a handful of survivors. Obviously Callisto was one of them.