[after Maria (Mermex) doesn't want to have sex with him]
It's bullshit. I spent 25 years with a woman who didn't put out. I deserve some.
It's been one day.
And a half.
“Head Cheese” · Season 4, Episode 11
In this episode: Andy Botwin (3), Celia Hodes (3), Doug Wilson (3), Maria (1)
[after Maria (Mermex) doesn't want to have sex with him]
It's bullshit. I spent 25 years with a woman who didn't put out. I deserve some.
It's been one day.
And a half.
[about Maria (Mermex)] Look, she's probably scared. I mean, she's totally out of her element. Make her feel comfortable.
How do I do that?
You talk to her.
Okay. Alright. Talk to her. About what?
About anything. On the way over here, we had great talks. She grew up in an orphanage. Start there.
She's an orphan?
Yeah.
Sweet. Daddy issues. Age difference should work in my favor.
[after Doug doesn't care he accidentally stepped on a sand castle]
You're a bad man.
You're a bad castle builder.
[to her drug rehab group] We're all like one big, wonderful, dysfunctional family, and I love you guys.
We ran your insurance info a few times, and it's not exactly accurate.
What seems to be the problem?
You don't have any. The policy number you gave us belongs to an individual who is deceased...and Korean.
[to the drug rehab secretary about not having insurance]
Don't you have a work program? I could do...dishes, landscaping...
I'm sorry, Celia. What we pay our help in a year won't cover a week here.
He is a terrible man.
What? Doug? Come on. He's a great guy.
He is a criminal.
He's an accountant.
A thief, who has abandoned his wife and family and wants to make me his whore.
A CPA with legal problems who's going through a divorce and is wildly in love with you.
He has warts on his genitals.
Yeah, I got nothing to that.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Weeds pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.