A character in The X's
Lorenzo Suave
The X's · 123 quotes
Tied for 3rd most-quoted character in The X's: in 35 of its 123 quotes
Most scenes with: Glowface (26), Tuesday X (3), Mr. X (3)
(in a one-on-one fight with Tuesday) Glowface doesn't even know I exist until he needs something from me!
Tell me about it! Is it too much to ask for a little appreciation?
And I told them all about Vitamin C and Echinacea!
And zinc, and elderberry, but do they listen?
No!
(while on the phone with Tuesday) What is that noise? You're not fighting evil, are you?
No, no, it's just a huge party. (turns to Glowface and Lorenzo) Right, everyone?
Um... get down, peoples!
Woohoo! Par-tay!
Who said that?
That was Glow... Glo... Gloria! My friend, at the party I'm having!
Oh, so you're okay, then?
Sure, sure. Just having a party, breaking stuff, making a mess.
Woo! Spring break!
Boogie!
Oh, I'm sorry we couldn't make it. Your father and I would've done the Funky Chicken.
Bye! (hangs up her cellphone, and she and Truman sigh with relief) That was a close one. (to Glowface and Lorenzo) Okay, go ahead.
(raising his hands) Raise the roof! Raise the roof!
Hello? Diabolical? (the two villains stop dancing)
Oh, right. (laughs evilly as Lorenzo resumes turning the crank to lower the kids toward the lava)
You okay after that wedgie?
I'd rather not talk about it, sir.
(practicing his speech) Foolish X's! My new doomsday device will obidlerate you all!... I said, "obidlerate", didn't I?
I'm afraid so, sir.
Obliterate. Obliterate. Man, that's a hard word.
Perhaps you could say "destroy" instead?
Are you kidding? That throws off the whole rhythm! (scoffs) Amateur. Ooh, what's taking the X's so long?! Okay. One more time. Foolish X's! My new doomsday device will olibderate-- (screams in frustration)
(sympathetically) I feel for you, sir.
(seeing the nouveau riche X's on TV) A billion dollars?! After all the trouble I go to to conquer and enslave the Earth, they get the fame? That is so unfair!
Sir, they're not famous. They're rich.
Fathead! Of course they're famous! They're on TV! Wow, the camera really does add 20 pounds.
SIR!! (Glowface stops screaming) Perhaps we could focus on world domination for a moment?
Aren't the Egg-Salads the dreamiest? (sighs) Wouldn't it be groovy to meet them?
You have met them, hundreds of times. You have been beaten senseless by them hundreds of times. You have sworn to destroy them hundreds of times!
Ah, Lorenzo. Any news on the X's?
Well, the word on the street is that Truman X ran away from home.
(eagerly) Ooh, do tell!
And he's built himself a miniature house so he can feel taller! (chuckles) Short people are so very amusing. (sees that Glowface is glaring at him and realizes his mistake) Oh, not all short people... I mean, not short! You're not short!
Shove a cork in it!
(to Lorenzo Suave) I'll make a giant inflatable suit! ...You're just pretending to be interested, aren't you?
No no no, nothing fascinates me more than a big bag of hot air.
Yeah, it is pretty darn- wait, was that sarcasm?!
(sarcastically) No.
...Good!
What're you gonna do--slowly lower us into an acid vat filled with robot sharks?
Uh... no? (looks behind himself at said death trap) Dang, that kid's good.
Indeed, sir.
(after Truman beat and tied him and Glowface up above the acid vat) Um, excuse me, we could use a wee bit of assistance. (chuckles nervously)
Sure, when you hit the acid, be sure to plug your nose and hold your breath.
(eagerly observing the wreckage Truman caused) Look what Truman X did to my headquarters!
(sadly) Yes. I'm sorry, too.
It's... awesome!
(on Truman) He reminds me of myself at that age. Only his mom didn't make him take accordion lessons. (beat) True- true story, right over here.
(baffled) Accordion lessons?
You know, Lorenzo, I've been thinking for some time that I need someone I can groom as a successor. I need a second-in-command!
(taken aback) Sir, I'm your second-in-command!
Right, so you see my problem. (Lorenzo pouts)
You know, buddy, we may be doomed, but there's no one I'd rather face a fiery demise with than you.
(smiles and pats Glowface's helmet, touched by his words) Ditto, sir.
And I'm sorry I called you "Lorenzo".
I am Lorenzo.
Whatever!
(on the Money Bestinkifier) Once activated, this device will render all the money in the world smelly! Check it out! (holds out a smelly dollar bill and Lorenzo takes a whiff)
Oh my... (faints)
See, it works great!
These quotes come from Wikiquote's The X's pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.
