Glowface quotes from The X's

Glowface

(after Mrs. X breaks her leg on a coffee table) Yes! No one can withstand the destructive power of bonking their shin on a coffee table!

Glowface

(reading a cue card) Now, my minions! (beat) Next card. (Lorenzo shows Glowface the next cue card and the latter reads from that) Destroy the X's!!!

Glowface

(when Mrs. X threatens to call the villains' mothers) Stop her before she calls my mom!

Glowface

(after endangering the rest of the X's gets Mrs. X back to normal) Ha! That got her mad! Wait, why'd I do that?

Glowface

Woohoo! Gutter ball! (starts doing the Robot, only to stop when Lorenzo whispers to him) What do you mean that's bad?

Glowface

(on the loudspeaker) I have just had the worst fever dream. Zombies were all chasin' me and I was trying to run, but I was, like, underwater, y'know. You ever have a dream like that?

Glowface

(searching himself on the Internet) G... L... O... W... F... Ace. And search! Only three matches?! Internet, you mock my glory! (pause) Maybe if I make it two words. Two words.

Glowface

(in a sauna with Truman, telling him about S.N.A.F.U.) Fridays are "Funny Hat Day". (two henchmen show up wearing funny hats and he yells at them) It's Thursday, you ninnies!

Great. Look at this. My leg's broken. (tries to move her leg and it cracks) Ahh! Yep, broken. Curse you coffee table, curse you!

Relax, sweetie pie.

Truman

We'll handle Glowface!

Glowface

Not while I have my escape pod! So long, suckers! (laughs as he enters the escape pod, but fails to close the hatch because his helmet's in the way) I knew I should've measured that.

(off-screen) Sir!

Glowface

(sees that Lorenzo hailed a taxi) So long, suckers! (laughs as he gets in the taxi and it leaves without Lorenzo)

(chasing after the taxi) Wait!

Glowface

This new secret headquarters is the best one yet! Just look! It's got a pit of doom! A shark tank! An atomic disintegrator! Spinning blades of evil! (laughs maniacally)

Those are ceiling fans, sir.

Glowface

(stops laughing) Well, I'm sure we'll think of some way to do evil with them.

Glowface

(speaking into a microphone) All henchmen report for free bagels! Repeat: free bagels!

Free bagels, sir?

Glowface

Hey, if I say "report for dangerous battle", nobody shows up!

Glowface

Yes, that's it, smile. Smile and say, (backs away from the camera, with the drape covering his helmet): "Surprise"! (The X's stare at him)

The, um... the drape... thingy...

Glowface

What? Oh. (reveals himself) Surprise!

Glowface!

Truman

(annoyed) Yeah!

Glowface

That’s right, is I, Glowface, leader of S.N.A.F.U.!

(removing his disguise) And I, Lorenzo Suave, his right-hand man!

Glowface

Nobody cares!

(walking away, miffed) Well, I...

Truman

(after Glowface reveals his plan to use the Truth Ray in his plan to conquer the world on live TV) Poo head!

Glowface

You're the poo head, poo head! Where was I?

Glowface

(after Brandon cuts the TV studio's power and the X's put on their night vision goggles) Ooh, night vision goggles! We should have those!

I'll pick some up-- (gets punched in the stomach by Mr. X, which sends him flying)

Glowface

(trying to find his way in the dark) Lorenzo! Lorenzo... (sees Mrs. X) no.

(she, her husband and Glowface have all been hit by the Truth Ray) Seeing Tuesday dating makes me feel old and... OLD!

I never thought Brandon was a spy! The thought of Tuesday dating terrifies me!

Glowface

I have thirty cats! I never floss! I like boy bands!