Home Base quotes from The X's

Home Base

So what evil scheme are you up to now? Are you going to have an army of muffins or a giant water balloon?

Home Base

Coming up next, it's "Mom's in a Death Trap" by Anita Rescue!

Tuesday X

(to Mrs. X, after she breaks her foot) Home Base says you'll be on your feet in no time.

Home Base

Actually, I said six-to-eight weeks.

Tuesday X

Home Base ...

Home Base

The ambassador of Pandrafia is in town to visit the museum of art. Your assignment is to protect him from those who may wish him harm.

Tuesday X

Like who?

Home Base

Mmm...practically everyone. He's a real jerk.

Home Base

Quiet, X's!!! I regret to inform you that SUPERIOR is furious! Once again, you've nearly blown your cover. They insist that you immediately do something to prove that you can act like a normal family, or, you will all be fired!

Tuesday

(gesturing around the living room) How are we ever gonna act like a normal family?! I mean, look at this place! Normal families don't have a remote control with a launch button! Normal families don't have exploding lawn gnomes! Normal families don't have portraits of themselves fighting giant robot squids!

Tuesday

Truman, come out and play! (holds up a tube of glue)

Home Base

(imitating Truman's voice offscreen) Wowee, I sure love that kind of glue. I can use some of dat der stuff for foolish monkeyshine. (appears onscreen) Ha ha ha.

Truman

Home Base! Quit imitating my voice!

A tranquility retreat? That's- ...a great idea!

Tuesday X

Huh?

I can keep myself sharp by getting my tranquility to retreat!

Home Base

I believe the intent is to make you more tranquil-

Tuesday X

(elbowing Home Base) You're right, mom! Isn't she, Home Base?

Home Base

What? Oh, I see! We're lying!

Tuesday X

Mom, don't you think you got a little bit carried away?

Home Base

You can be just a wee bit...gut-wrenchingly terrifying.

Truman

(hacking into Home Base and speaking in a robotic voice) Attention, Mr. and Mrs. X.

Home Base

I don't sound like that!

Truman

Don't listen to, um, me. I am cuckoo.

Alright Home Base, we're gonna need a tennis field.

Home Base

No. I believe it's a tennis court sir.

Tennis field, now!

Home Base

(to the X's) In addition, you have appalling taste in footwear.

No one insults our shoes! Get outta my house!

Home Base

(angrily) I AM your house.

Then we'll get out. We don't need you, Mr. Smarty-House.

Glowface

Where are the X's?

Home Base

You just missed them, you blithering idiot!

Truman

What are you, a house or a chicken coop?

Home Base

A very frightened chicken coop!