(Venture just revealed that, in college...)
Wait! You lived with BROCK?? That is so unbelievably cool!
No wonder you guys are such super pals!
(Brock just sits expressionlessly)
Actually... back then we didn't see much of each other...
(dorm flashback: Venture is laying awake in his bunk. Brock's bunk above his is squeaking, bouncing up and down furiously, accompanied by Brock grunting rhythmically and a young woman moaning)
We had very different schedules... always coming and going... at... different times...
Wait, tell 'em who really won the roommate lottery that year.
Oh, God, don't remind me.
Okay, so the university sticks me with this exchange student, (switch to college) but check it out, he's, like, a prince or something. His parents sent him a care package last week for his birthday. You know what he got? A personal slave. The poor guy sleeps in my closet. Speak of the dickweed. Hey, Werner.
Baron Ünderbheit!!!
(back to present) Yeah. You told 'em?
No, Baron Ünderbheit is right there!
Holy crap! Brock, kick his butt!
Relax, boys, he's not gonna do anything. It's hallowed ground.
So what was he (Baron Ünderbheit) like in the olden days?
Well, except for the metal jaw, pretty much the same—total dick.
(dorm flashback: Ünderbheit and White arguing near door of Venture's room)
The tape is on the floor for a reason, Peter! Your things belong on your side of the room and don't think I haven't noticed that you moved it to make your area larger. If you cannot obey the simplest of rules...
Yeah, well, you don't make the rules, fella. You might be a big shot in your own country but around here you're just a kid with the weirdest-smelling lunch.
ARRRRRRGGGGHHH! Very well! Then you leave me with no choice but to take this up with the R.A. at the next floor meeting. Come, man-servant.
(Ünderbheit leaves)
Who cuts his hair, the Incredible Hulk?
What, did he walk into the barbershop and say, "what can you do to make me look more like Pete Rose?"
Hey, what's wrong with his hair? I have, like, the same haircut.
Yeah, but you're Chinese, your people can't be blamed for what your hair does.
I'm Japanese, jerk-off. But yah, that's so true. At least I don't have his eyebrows.
You wanna see eyebrows, come to my Creative Writing class. There's this kid, no joke, they're out to here, and the weirdness doesn't stop there. All he writes are these way-too-specific poems about monarch butterflies. Total closet case!
(present) Okay, this is getting nuts. You're not gonna tell me that you went to college with the Monarch too! Where did you guys go, Super Crazy No-Way School?!
More from this episode
All quotes from this episode →More The Venture Bros. quotes · These quotes come from Wikiquote's The Venture Bros. pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.