Tick quotes from The Tick (live-action)

And here we are at the Eiffel Tower.

I fell...

No, "Eiffel"

You fell?

Guttersnipe! Halt now or face the combustible justice of... the Fiery Blaze!

And his sideKICK [kicks the burglar] Friendly Fire!

Tick

Lordy, gents, your banter is immaculate! A pleasure to witness.

Arthur

So, Tick, you know, I've been thinking. We have it pretty good. We fill in each other's weak spots. You're bulletproof, for instance, while I'm not.

Tick

True — but it's your firm grip on reality that keeps our ship on course.

Arthur

Well... yeah, I guess you're right...

Tick

Guess, nothin'! You're on a first-name basis with lucidity, little friend. I have to call it Mister Lucidity... and that's no good in a pinch.

Arthur

I just don't wanna turn into Blaze and Fire, okay?

Tick

Good heavens, man, what kind of crazy Frankenscience could make that possible?

Liberty

My God, Tick! What planet are you living on?

Tick

Plant Me.

Liberty

Planet Stupid!

Batmanuel

Hey, don't take this out on the Tick! HE is not the one who took a national treasure to bed and then killed him with his pink secrets!

Tick

Why is that fella wearing a dress?

Arthur

[whispering] Because he's the judge.

Tick

Well, I judge him and find him funny!

Tick

Could be nothin'... could be the stench of unfathomable evil.

Tick

Hey, Bossy! Why don't you try that on somebody my size?

Do you know who I am?

Tick

Yeah, I know who you are, Destinko. Why don't you curl up your metal mitts into fists — 'cause you face the Tick!

I will destroy you!

Tick

Bring it on, crap-lobster!

Tick

Aaaaah... my head feels like-like it's gonna have a baby!

Arthur

It's called a headache.

Tick

It has a NAME?!?

Tick

Ewwww! This is the worst tasting candy, ever!

Tick

Gimme that ! (snatches the judge's gavel) Who died and made you the cross-dressing king of justice?

Arthur

Contempt of COURT?!?

Tick

Well, "contempt" is a strong word. I certainly didn't like court very much...

Captain Liberty

If you two were really my friends, you'd be supporting me instead of betraying me.

Tick

Captain Liberty, we are your friends... even though we're betraying you.

We are the cream of the crop.

Tick

And the cream is white!