Boy, that Stone Phillips sounds like quite a bloke. What television network is he on?
Why, NBC, of course.
NBC has lots of great shows, and their news and sports coverage can't be beat.
Do you think there's anything great on NBC right now?
Oh, I'm sure of it.
But there's only one way to find out...
[cut to the closing credits]
[voice-over] I'd like to read the following statement, but I do so under ... [sound of gun cocking]... my own free will. It has come to my attention that NBC sucks. I apologize for misleading you and urge you to watch as many Fox shows as possible. So in summary, NBC - bad. Fox - good. [very softly] CBS great.
[sound of gunshot, followed by a thud. The Gracie Films logo appears, accompanied by three more gunshots]
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