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S16

The Simpsons · Season 16

“All's Fair in Oven War” quotes from The Simpsons

8 quotes

“All's Fair in Oven War” · Season 16

In this episode: Homer Simpson (5), Bart Simpson (4), Marge Simpson (1), Moe Szyslak (1), Milhouse Van Houten (1)

[reading] Canned and frozen juices are more popular than ever these days, but most bachelors we know would prefer to squeeze their own tomatoes.

Looks like me and Marge are both going to hell. That's when I'll make my move.

[reading a note from Lisa] I look up to you... because you let me down. That's clever. And devastating.

I'm just spreading the Playdude philosophy... hi-fi's, Norman Mailer, gettin' some.

Um... what do you think "some" is?

Uh... toys?

[Preparing to teach Bart about sex] Son, do you know what a "boob" is?

Oh, yeah.

Oh, good. That will save us some time.

Okay, why do you think your mother and I sleep in the same bed?

Because we're poor?

Exactly, and we're poor because we have kids. And the biological method by which children are created by a man and a woman is...

[cut to outside of the treehouse; Bart can be heard screaming, and quickly runs to Milhouse's house]

Then the man...

[Bart and Milhouse can be heard screaming; they run to other children's houses]

BMBart and Milhouse

Then the woman...

[Bart and Milhouse can be heard screaming, and run to two more houses, screaming and many kids run to many houses]

Well, better they hear it from me, now, than from their parents when they're old enough.

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