Patrick quotes from The Patrick Star Show

Patrick

[sniffs] Mmm. [laughs] What's that heavenly aroma?

Patrick

[comes out of his house] Hi, I'm Patrick Star! And I live with my parents! [closes the door, his hand gets jammed by it and he yelps]

Patrick

This is my dad!

Patrick

This is my mom!

Patrick

This is my sister! [Squidina farts and gets surrounded by a black cloud and runs away] She's shy.

Patrick

This is my grandpa! [he runs to his room which is a television screen through which his friends are applauding] This is my room! And this...

Patrick

This is my show!

Patrick

Hi, SpongeBob. Fancy meeting you here. [restrained chuckle]

SpongeBob

Hi, Patrick. Trying out a new look? [gets the tie off Patrick, and the latter inhales deeply]

Patrick

Yeah, I'm looking for a job.

SpongeBob

Oh, what a coincidence. I could also use a job. [Popeye impression] Myeh, 'cause I'm a little low on lettuce and I need some scratch for spatulas, see?

Patrick

It's not a coincidence, SpongeBob. It's just two similar things happening at the same time.

Patrick

Check it, Sis! [ties hot dogs into a dog shape] A sea poodle! [laughs, then burns his hand] Ahh! Oh-oh-oh-oh! Ow! Ow! [runs through shelves] Ooh! Ooh! Ahh!

Huh?

Patrick

Ooh! [eats ice cream off his hand, Kid starts crying and runs away. Huh? I'll make us a family sized vacation feast. [chuckles and Patrick grabs some bags of snacks from the shelves. He shoves them into the microwave, along with some slushies and drinks. He closes it, elbows it shut, and sets the timer, then walks away. The kid that Patrick took the ice cream from is talking to the manager.]

[sadly] And then he ate it! [points to Patrick] There he is! [whimpering]

Patrick

Excuse me, sir, you can't come in here [points to the kid] ruining customer's ice cream cones! [waves finger] That's our policy!

Patrick

[puts hands on head] Whaaa!? [grabs him and runs over the kid] Sis, get a picture of me with the Gas Land mascot!

Squidina

All right, Stars, photo op! [the family members come in] Say cheese poofs!

Cheese poofs!

SpongeBob

I'm ready! I'm ready! I'm ready! I'm ready! Ready to work at the Krusty Krab, but first...

Patrick

SPONGE SMASH!

If I give you this, will you stay out of my way?

Patrick

Our basement is the darkest house in the room.

Patrick

[to puppet] I think your magic word is broken! [as puppet] Argh! You moronic, imbecilic dimwit! [puppet punches him in the face multiple times, and he falls down, Patrick, now injured, puts the puppet in its box.]

[shaking in box] Lemme outta here!

Patrick

What's the magic word? [Marcie's dolphin sounds are heard] Whoa!

GrandPat

Wow!

Patrick

That's not very kid friendly! Bad puppet!

Oh No, Robot Gardener Day!!! [both sob hysterically]

GrandPat

Welp, you know what they say "Into the frying pan and into the mower!" [Laughs as the episode ends]

SpongeBob

Hey, This Was in mint Condition, or at least very good-slash-fine [All Babies Cry Together]

Patrick

Hey, Hey, Hey, Superheroes And Supervillians Don't Cry, They BATTLE! [Baby Ray Zaps Barnacle Bambino] Now You're Getting It, Baby Superhero Fight!

Patrick

That guy must be a celebrity, he covered his face with a ski mask so he wouldn’t be noticed by pepperoni.

Squidina

You Mean "Paparazzi"?

GrandPat

[removes his VR goggles] Can't an old man play violent video games in peace anymore? Grr! [looks up] Water? [gets angry and goes to the bathroom while the rest of the family is still laughing]

Bunny

[as GrandPat approaches] We got shrunk!

Patrick

Hey, GrandPat!

Cecil

Can you get us some tiny towels?

Patrick

Two ice cream sundaes, Scoop Chucky! Extra large! And make it snappy! What are you gonna have, cuz?

Oh, nothing for me, thanks. I came for the music.

Chocolate, vanilla, and strawberry, buttercream cone and black cherry, all of these flavors make me merry... when I'm eating ice cream!

Patrick

Everybody come upstairs now!

Cecil

What's the hold up?

Bunny

Oh, no! What's wrong?

Squidina

Patrick, what is it?

Patrick

He won't eat. He won't bark. He won't bite. Did he turn blue? Tinkle is--

Squidina

Dainty?

Bunny

Delightful?

Cecil

Decalcified?

Patrick

Dead!

Bunny

[sobbing] AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!

Patrick

Our next guest is a real frosty treat! Let's hear it for ice cream!

Thank you! Thank you! My wife just had a baby. Guess that now makes me a popsicle! [laughs]

Patrick

[laughs and then starts drooling]

Wait. Why? Why are you looking at me like that? [screams as Patrick eats the ice cream cone guy, ending the episode]

Rube

And, top it all off with the tastiest ride! -

Patrick

Whaa? Ohh! [perks up, looks behind him, and his eyes pop out as he sees the next ride]

Rube

The Baked Alaska! It's got every flavor known to man, man! It's all for you, Patrick. Patrick. Patrick. Patrick. Patrick.

Patrick

[looks above him, sweating and drooling in delight] Ohhhhhhhhh... [a close up painting is shown of the star ice cream dazed, but it turns out to be a dream]

Squidina

[walks into Patrick's room] Patrick? Patrick? Patrick! Wake up, Patrick, it's showtime! We've got a crowd today so - [looks below at the drool puddle] Huh, why is the floor wet? Oh, another ice cream dream..