Christine Campbell quotes from The New Adventures of Old Christine

Christine

Well, I'm leaving. I want to thank you for a particularly humiliating afternoon.

Are you mad at me?

Christine

Mad at you? Oh no, that was great. I don't know which part was my favorite: serving drinks to the "Meanie Moms" or watching Marly's husband massage your gums with his tongue.

I know. I'm sorry. I should have locked the door.

Christine

Yeah, that's pretty much the only thing that was wrong with it. You know, I'm not Marly's biggest fan but she really doesn't deserve this.

I know. It's wrong, but I hope that you and I can still be friends.

Christine

Yeah, I don't think so.

Why, because I'm Portuguese? Because I'm a maid?

Christine

Ah, no, it's because, well, you're kind of a whore.

Christine

I was vulnerable, I was having a hard day! You took advantage of me!

Richard

You put your hands down my pants!

Burton

Christine, I'm sorry. I know you were probably kind of surprised to see that I was seeing someone so soon after we broke up. But I really didn't think it would bother you, especially since you're the one who broke up with me.

Christine

Oh, no, it didn't bother me. I've seen people too, lots. I'm the town factory for God's sake. You can't close me down.