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SEASON 1

The Nanny · Season 1

The Nanny Season 1 quotes

383 quotes · page 7 of 26

The Nanny
All S1

S1 E15Unfinished Business

oeh, i have located the black box [holds up some kind of computer] i can't believe he just leaves it lying around [Fran squeals, Maxwell walks in and Fran quickly sits on a drawer]

Miss Babcock...Babs baby [Maxwell stands next to C.C.]

ssshhh

Babi honey

No it's alright i do this all the time [Fran makes a face as Maxwell looks shocked] how do you think i now were he is every minute? Now what was his password?

Busted?

No Maxwell would never [turns] oeh, Maxwell i uh was just looking for the [mumbles something] file and i just rememberd where i left it [walks out]

Stay out of the guestroom! [C.C. quickly walks the other way]

So what brings you here, Miss Fine? [sits on his desk]

Oh, nothing.

Children are doing well?

Uh huh.

Household running okay?

Oh yeah.

Anything on fire?

No, no.

Then get out!

What?

I was just thinking...before you came into my life, I never had the need for an emergency transvestite.

EErik

Don't you have a big reunion tomorrow night?

[Swooning] Yeah...

EErik

Well, I'm the hombre who's taking you.

Oh, my God! This is amazing! This is like a dream! How could this be?

We told him how desperate you were.

[Still ecstatic] Oh, THANK YOU!!

So, Ms. Fine, back from the batting cages. How did my boy do?

Well... He made contact with the ball. And, er, he'll have a great career if the Bee Gees ever get back together.

I can't wait to hit the buffet tables in Atlantic City. He's got a safari jacket with 40 pockets in it. We won't have to order room service.

Honey, to you, Brighton's an obnoxious brother. But to other little girls, he's 79 pounds of pure stud muffin.

Ew!

Niles, pour me some more tea. [Niles ignores her and continues chopping vegetables] I want some more tea, Niles. [Niles continues to ignore her.] You are a butler, now buttle!

[Maxwell enters the kitchen. C.C. doesn't notice, but Niles does.]

Would you like some tea, Miss Babcock?

You know damn well I want some more tea, you imbecile, now pour!!

C.C.!

Maxwell!

Don't speak to Niles like that; poor man isn't a mind-reader!

But... But, Maxwell—!

Oh, it's alright, sir. Perhaps my hearing isn't what it once was. Forgive me.

Dak and I are a match made in heaven. I like dark meat, he likes light. I could hear the movie, he could see it. I've got a right lung, he's got a left... Thank you for introducing us. Most guys my age are senile. [exits dining room] I'll be in the gift shop.

Yetta, you didn't drop anything under the table and go look for it did ya?

One time, just to see if i still had it.

SMr.Sheffield

Oh my god...that was you?

That was you?

Do you two want to be alone?

Oh dear. That was the last apple.

Oh, I'm sorry, old man. Did you want it?

Well, yes, sir, but I didn't realize I wanted it until someone else had sunk his teeth into it and now it's too late. It was right there in front of me. If only I snatched it up when I had the chance, I wouldn't have this aching hunger.

Good God, man, have a bloody pear!

. . .

Oh dear. That was the last pear.

Oh, I'm sorry. Did you want it?

Well, yes, but I didn't realize I wanted it until someone else had sunk his teeth into it.

You snooze, you lose.

KKurt

Listen, I haven't seen this soap in seven months. Catch me up.

Well, they're still at Erica's party...

Alright while your here, do you think I should take this back [holds up a sparkly top, not noticing that she isn't wearing a shirt]

Uh, I think you should put it on...

No, I already had it on, it flattens out my br-. [notices she's in her bra and screams] Mr. Sheffield! Why didn't you say anything?!

Well, I uh...I didn't notice!

You didn't- you know now I'm beginning to wonder about you to! [gets stuck in her shirt] Oh I can't get it on, I'm stuck, help me.

Oh, relax Miss Fine we'll get it on [Niles walks by and stares with shock as Maxwell tries to take her shirt off]

Oh Mr. Sheffield I'm so hot!

I can't do this standing up, just...just get on the bed! [sits her down on the bed and sits on top of her]

[ gets it off and she falls on the bed, his mouth falls open in shock as he looks up and sees Niles, Fran notices too]

...If you let me tell Miss Babcock about this, I'll work free for a year.

[walks in the kitchen, Niles is writing something] Well, I couldn't be happier that Nanny Fine finally found a man. Oh, what are looking so smug about?

Oh, just an incident in Miss Fine's room last night.

With her and Kurt?

No, with her and another man.

Ooo, I love it. Tell me, tell me!

Oh no, I couldn't possibly. I swore I wouldn't say a word. [rips off a note] Read this.

[reads the note] ...WHY?! [her head falls down on the counter] I wanna die!

There, there, [puts a knife into her purse} now don't do anything rash... [Maxwell walks in]

Hello C.C.

You animal! [walks out]

Niles?!

[innocently] Sir?

You didn't say anything to Miss Babcock about last night, did you?

[innocently] No, you told me not to.

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