What is this device?
Uhh, it's the thingy you point at things with.
This is the BTRS scanner.
And BTRS stands for…?
Beyond the Realm of Science. As in, this machine scans for things that are…
Beyond the Realm of Science? Wow. Handy.
All S1
S1 E15Unfinished Business
I know you and I have been through Hell and back together…
I thought Hell and the Underworld were two different things?
So did I ace it, or did I ace it?
There's acing it, and there's what you did. Kind of like shooting a cow with a Howitzer.
I would never shoot a cow.
And I get the feeling you don't share my enthusiasm.
Then I'm wearing the right expression.
Sensei Ping loves pain and suffering like tornadoes love trailer parks.
My gut says we may be dealing with the seminal stages of a zombie outbreak.
Entrail-ripping brain-chewing zombies?
The very same.
Cool.
Do you not realize how serious a zombie outbreak is? A Middleman once died in a zombie outbreak only to come back as a zombie, his own Middleman in Training had to shoot him in the head. Do you want to shoot me in the head?
Well, no.
You got your nude self-portrait into a gallery show?
PPip
That was my sister. And no, my period of erotic sibling representation is over.
But I've always been fascinated by the ability of preassembled sets of submasculine archetypes to tug at the heartstrings of a 12-to-17-year-old fanbase.
Funny, I've always been fascinated by their ability to bring up my lunch.
Now, let’s try to get there before that little girl sucks the band through a hole... (noticing Wendy's horrified expression) ...in space.
Dubbie, before I activate this, I have one question. Answer truthfully: are you pregnant?
Are you kidding?!
I'm as serious as Mao Tse-Tung's heart attack!
No!
Is there any chance you might be pregnant?
Only with anticipation at what you're gonna do with that tube-y gizmo thingie.
Seriously, Dubbie! No chance?
I'm pretty sure-
Pretty sure's not sure!
Look! Do you want me to go into the stark and gore-less details of my post-Ben dry spell? Where all I see when I look at a guy are the 422 pressure points I know to incapacitate him?
...okay. (activates the device)
What do you do for a living?
We are international consultants that solve exotic problems for corporations, individuals and even governments. Obviously our clients often prefer anonymity.
That's so clear... concise.
We're agents Boetticher and Kennedy from American Shrimp and Crab Amalgamed Processors. Law enforcement branch.
CCecil
ASCAP?
We avoid using the acronym for copyright reasons.
But, uh, whenever unexpected shrimp or crab appear in the context of a homicide, we're not far behind.
Time to quit your grinning and drop your linen, people.
I told young Tyler to scram.
You made the cute boy go bye-bye?
These quotes come from Wikiquote's The Middleman pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.