I would kill Gloria if she ever wrote about my sexual escapades.
You'd kill your sister over a pamphlet?
“Sisters and Other Strangers” · Season 5, Episode 20
In this episode: Dorothy Zbornak (6), Rose Nylund (4), Sophia Petrillo (4), Magda (4), Blanche Devereaux (2)
[in the bookstore] If you need me, I'll be in the "Bitter Children of Celebrities" section.
Rose, you're bringing down the curve for the whole country!
[marveling at Blanche's house] Such a beautiful home! Who sleeps with government official?
That would be my friend Blanche.
[on Communism] The way things were, we knew what to do, the choices were easy. When there is one road, no one gets lost.
Not necessarily. Back in St. Olaf---
Rose, is this a story about someone getting lost?
Uh-huh.
Well, don't tell us, show us.
[confronting Charmaine at her book-signing] Well, I should've known I couldn't trust you, that all that "Let's be sisters" stuff was just a bunch of bull! You had no right to use my life for your book, to twist facts so that beautiful, sacred love became so much tawdry trash! I earned that "A" in History! For the first time in my life, I am ashamed to be a Hollingsworth. Vixen: Story of a Woman is nothing but a vulgar collection of perverse sexual acts that are sheer and utter FILTH!
[Blanche slams her copy of the book down on Charmaine's table and storms away. Immediately, upon hearing Blanche's description of the book, a large group of people - including Magda and Sophia - run towards the table, and snatch up copies of the book, and begin eagerly reading.]
You know something, Blanche, you're not the only one who ever had a problem with sisters. When I was a kid, I had a doll named Mrs. Doolittle, and Gloria was not supposed to---
Do we have to listen to that damn Mrs. Doolittle story again?! So your sister broke your doll! It was 50 years ago!
It was very traumatic. [voice breaking] She was my favorite doll! I didn't talk to Gloria for months. But eventually, Blanche, I realized, sisters are harder to replace than dolls, so we made up. And I vowed right then and there never, ever to fight over something so childish and silly again---[to Sophia] ---MY FAVORITE!
I have a sister story I think you'll find interesting...
She didn't just break it, she made it so the eyes would never close again! She made Mrs. Doolittle look like a morphine addict!
[Rose has begun to tell a St. Olaf story but Dorothy and Sophia haven't forgotten Mrs. Doolittle.]
Now, here's the scary part. Suddenly I realized I was this frightened little girl alone in the big city.
[to Sophia] Accident, my foot!
It started to rain, and I stood there in the middle of the town square and cried...
Gloria was the one who had to get the rabies shot!
[turns to Blanche] I was a biter.
I had very bad fight with my sister once.
Oh, really? Tell us about it.
I turned her over to secret police.
And?
And what? I turned her over to secret police. No more to tell.
Rose, how can you say America is the best. Everywhere you look, you see the rich take advantage of the poor, there is so much inequity.
Well sure there's inequities but at least we treat everybody the same.
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