The Closer quotes

Brenda

There's a female investigator working for an intelligence agency who was in a relationship who you seduced into coming to Los Angeles on a regular basis. It all sounds so familiar, and yet I'm surprised.

Pope

Do you want to talk about this...in detail?

Brenda

Just drop it.

Pope

Because we can.

Brenda

Drop it, I said. And tell me what else you know about the victim that can help me.

Pope

Maggie was honest. Except about me with her husband, she was an honest person. She was a relentless investigator. She believed in what she was doing. Her personal life may have been a bit of a mess, but she was extremely professional. And she was stubborn when she was right, which she almost always was.

Brenda

Thanks.

Fritz

Brenda, is something wrong?

Brenda

This is ridiculous.

Fritz

Our real estate agent said it would help sell the house, give it a "home for the holidays" vibe. And we both know Gary doesn't lie.

Brenda

[scoffs] Gary. He hasn't brought us an offer in three months, suddenly he calls out of the blue and we're supposed to hop to? Because he's got "the buyer", again?

Fritz

Brenda, if you don't wanna show the house, just say so.

Brenda

I want to show the house, I just don't wanna waste the day decorating it for one couple!

Fritz

Is it really so terrible to have the house feeling a little festive?

Brenda

I do not like it when I am ordered to be festive!

You have a tough job. You have to make hard decisions. And I guess if I would trust anybody to make hard decisions, it'd be my little girl.

Provenza

Family Law Attorney Real Property Lien. FLARPL.

Flynn

Sounds like something you would get at a Dairy Queen. In India.

Provenza

Well, its a law permitting asshole divorce lawyers to put a lien on a clients home to ensure payment.

Flynn

Your second wife?

Fritz

You see, being a alcoholic isn't such a bad thing as long as you don't pour yourself a drink.

Fritz

Apparently you put the house on the market.

Brenda

Well, you have to do that to sell it, apparently. Where we'll go after that, I have no idea, since we haven't been able to find the thing we're looking for and honestly the idea of strangers walking around my stuff bothers the living daylights out of me. And I thought that I said we would wait and sell this place after we found something else and were moved out, but I guess that's not what I said.

Fritz

I'm sorry we fought. I'm sorry I didn't tell you about the drinking, and I'm sorry. I'm sorry I said all that about you.

Brenda

No, no. I'm not always straightforward. You were right about that. I don't always know what to say, so I say the thing I know the other person wants to hear.

Fritz

It's an occupational hazard.

Brenda

And I miss chocolate so much.

Gabriel

For keeping the team together despite some pretty hefty pressure, and for trusting her instincts, about us too, by the way, and for how she always works so hard to get her man: I say, Hail to the Chief.

To the Chief!

Brenda

You know, I should have the authority to reject journalists if I think that they're going to get in the way my investigation.

Pope

Authority? What about my authority. I get orders, too, okay? Mine were absolutely clear in this case: improve relations between the LAPD and the media. That is what I am doing. Commander Taylor is assisting me and I expect your enthusiastic cooperation.

Brenda

[looks away in frustration] Fine, Will. Whatever you want.

Pope

Besides, it's a big story. I'd rather have him reporting it from inside than guessing from out on the street. He might even prove to be an asset of some --

Brenda

[sarcastically] Yes, journalists, they're so helpful we'll want them on every case.

Pope

I take it this is your attempt at enthusiasm?

Brenda

I'm sorry. I meant to say yippee!

Brenda

You can't leave the curtains open! Someone is going to see Kitty and then there's going to be big, big trouble.

Fritz

We can't meet the upstairs neighbor because the landlord said no pets. We have to keep the curtains closed 24 hours a day because the landlord said no pets. It's like living with Anne Frank.

Brenda

[Lt. Tao uncovers a dead body] Oh! What is that smell?!

Tao

Margaritas! One is never enough, two is too many, and twelve? Well, you're looking at twelve.

Brenda

My hit-and-run turned out to be a hit-and-run-around-the-block-and-then-hit-him-again...and run.

Brenda

Anything useful come out of Commander Taylor's press release?

Daniels

Four calls saying 'It is a good day', a guy called and said that he killed Roy Wilkinson, though he claimed he shot him, an insurance agency, a couple of ambulance-chasing lawyers, and thirteen people reporting reckless drivers.

Provenza

And a partridge in a pear tree.

Pope

I just told Commander Taylor to arrange a press conference for first thing in the morning; let the world know the Mayhans had nothing to do with this.

Brenda

Uh, if you don't mind, I think Lieutenant Flynn should handle this one.

Pope

Yeah, okay.

Brenda

Thanks.

Flynn

Hey, Chief? Thank you.

Taylor

Anthony Lambert, Tim Zwick and Daniel Zcebrowski all insist that on the night of the rape they were at the movies, and on the night of the murder they were driving around Hollywood.

Daniels

And they said Darrin was with them on both occasions.

Brenda

That's funny, Mark Yates told me on the night Michelle died Darrin was with him. I worry when a suspect has extra alibis.

Wait a minute. Wait, wait, wait. I want an attorney for my son.

Brenda

Your son is eighteen, sir, and legally recognized as an adult. He has been read his rights and waived his right to an attorney.

I demand an attorney for my son or that I'm allowed back in there before any further questioning!!

Brenda

You may not be aware of this: the constitution gives you the right to an attorney, not to a father.