Castiel quotes from Supernatural

Castiel

You can't reach him, Dean. You're outside your coverage zone.

Dean

What're you gonna do to Sam?

Castiel

Nothing. He's gonna do it to himself.

Dean

What's that supposed to mean? Oh right, right. Better toe the company line. Why are you here, Cas?

Castiel

We've been through much together, you and I; I just wanted to say I'm sorry it ended like this.

Dean

Sorry? [Dean hits Castiel] It's Armageddon, Cas, you need a bigger word than "sorry."

Castiel

Try to understand; this is long foretold, this is your--

Dean

Destiny? Don't give me that "holy" crap. Destiny, God's plan... It's all a bunch of lies, you poor, stupid, son of a bitch! It's just a way for your bosses to keep me and keep you in line! You know what's real? People, families - that's real. And you're gonna watch them all burn?

Castiel

What is so worth saving?! I see nothing but pain here. I see inside you, I see your guilt, your anger, confusion. In Paradise, all is forgiven. You'll be at peace. Even with Sam.

Dean

You can take your peace... and shove it up your lily-white ass. 'Cause I'll take the pain and the guilt. I'll even take Sam as is. It's a lot better than being some Stepford bitch in Paradise. This is simple, Cas! No more crap about being a good soldier; there is a right, and there is a wrong here, and you know it. Look at me! You know it! And you were gonna help me once, weren't you? You were gonna warn me about all this, before they dragged you back to Bible Camp. Help me, now. Please.

Castiel

What would you have me do?

Dean

Get me to Sam. We can stop this before it's too late!

Castiel

I do that, we will all be hunted! We'll all be killed!

Dean

If there is anything worth dying for... this is it... [Castiel shakes his head] You spineless, soulless, son of a bitch. What do you care about dying? You're already dead. We're done.

Castiel

Dean.

Dean

We're done.

Bobby

You're telling me you lost your mojo just in time to get me stuck in this trap the rest of my life?!

Castiel

I'm sorry.

Bobby

Shove it up your ass.

Dean

[quietly, to Sam] Well, at least he's talking now.

Bobby

I heard that.

Castiel

I don't have much time; we need to talk.

Dean

Okay.

Castiel

Your plan. "Kill Lucifer."

Dean

Yeah, you wanna help?

Castiel

No. It's foolish, it can't be done.

Dean

Oh, well, thanks for the support.

Dean

God?

Castiel

Yes.

Dean

God.

Castiel

Yes. He isn't in Heaven, He has to be somewhere.

Dean

Try New Mexico, I hear He's on a tortilla.

Castiel

No, He's not on any flatbread.

Dean

Listen, chuckles, even if there is a God, He is either dead, and that's the generous theory-

Castiel

He is out there, Dean.

Dean

...or, He's up and kicking and doesn't give a rat's ass about any of us. I mean, look around you, man; the world is in the toilet! We are literally at the end of days here, and He's off somewhere drinking booze out of a coconut. Alright?

Castiel

Enough. This is not a theological issue; it's strategic. With God's help, we can win.

Dean

It's a pipe-dream, Cas.

Castiel

[angrily] I killed two angels this week. That's my brothers. I'm hunted, I have rebelled, and I did it - all of it - for you. And you failed. You and your brother destroyed the world. And I lost everything, for nothing. So keep your opinions to yourself.

Dean

Tell me something; you keep saying we're gonna trap this guy, but isn't that kinda like trapping a hurricane with a butterfly net?

Castiel

No, it's harder.

Dean

Do we have any chance of surviving this?

Castiel

You do.

Dean

...So, odds are, you're a dead man tomorrow?

Castiel

Yes.

Dean

Oh. Well, last night on earth, what, uh... what're your plans?

Castiel

I just thought I'd sit here quietly.

Dean

Dude, c'mon, anything? Hm? Booze, women? [Castiel glances at Dean, then looks away quickly] You have been with a woman before. Right? Or an angel, at least? [Castiel rubs his neck in embarrassment. Dean leans down to almost talk in his ear] You mean to tell me you've never been up there doing a little cloud seeding?

Castiel

Look, I've never had occasion, okay?

Castiel.

Castiel

Raphael.

Dean

Oh, you know, I thought you were supposed to be impressive. All you do is black out the room?

And the eastern seaboard. It is a testament to my unending mercy that I don't smite you here and now.

Dean

Or maybe you're full of crap. Maybe you're afraid that God'll bring Cas back to life again, and smite you and your candy-ass skirt. By the way, hi, I'm Dean. [Waves]

I know who you are, and now thanks to him [glances at Castiel] I know where you are.

Castiel

You won't kill him. You wouldn't dare.

But I will take him to Micheal.

But there's no other explanation. He's gone for good.

Castiel

You're lying.

Am I? Do you remember the twentieth century? Think the twenty-first is going any better? Do you think God would've let any of that happen if He were alive?

Dean

Oh yeah? Well then who invented the Chinese basket trick?

Careful. That's my Father you're talking about, boy.

Dean

Yeah, who would be so proud to know that His sons started the friggin' apocalypse.

Who ran off and disappeared. Who left no instructions, and a world to run.

Dean

So Daddy ran away and disappeared. He didn't happen to work for the post office, did He?

This is funny to you? You're living in a Godless universe!

Dean

Look, I'll be the first to tell you that this little crusade of yours is nuts, but... I do know a little something about missing fathers.

Castiel

What do you mean?

Dean

I mean, there were times when I was looking for my dad when... all logic said that he was dead. But I knew, in my heart, that he was still alive. So, who cares what some Ninja Turtle says, Cas? What do you believe?

Castiel

I believe He's out there.

Dean

Good. Then go find Him.

Castiel

What about you?

Dean

What about me? I don't know. Honestly... I'm good. I can't believe I'm saying that, but I am, I'm... I'm really good.

Castiel

Even without your brother?

Dean

Especially without my brother. I mean, I spend so much time worrying about the son of a bitch. I mean, I've had more fun with you in the past twenty-four hours than I've had with Sam in years. And you're not that much fun. It's funny, you know, I've been so chained to my family, but now that I'm alone... hell, I'm happy.

Sam

I don't get it, Jesse is the devil's son?

Castiel

[sighs and lets loose an eye roll] No, of course not; your Bible gets more wrong than it does right.

Dean

[steps between Sam and Castiel] Okay, hey, look, we are not going to kill him. Alright? But we can't leave Jesse here, either. We know that. So... we take him to Bobby's, he'll know what to do.

Castiel

You'll kidnap him? What is going on in this town, it's what happens when this thing is happy; you cannot imagine what it will do if it's angry.

Castiel

The demon Crowley is making a deal; even as we speak, it's... going... down.

Dean

Going down? Right. Okay, Huggy Bear, just don't lose him.

Castiel

I won't lose him.

Castiel

Lucifer.

Lucifer

So, I take it you're here with the Winchesters?

Castiel

I came alone.

Lucifer

Loyalty... such a nice quality to see this day and age.

Dean

[speaking on his cell] Cas, it's Dean. Yeah, Room 31-C, basement level, St. James Medical Center--

Castiel

[appears in front of Dean, still talking into the cell phone] I'm there now.

Dean

...Yeah, I get that.

Castiel

I'm gonna hang up now.

Dean

Right.

Castiel

What human myth has mistaken for Cupid is actually a lower order of angel. Technically it's a cherub. Third class.

Dean

Cherub?

Castiel

Yeah. They're all over the world, there are dozens of them.

Dean

You mean the little flying fat kid in diapers.

Dean

Are you saying that you fixed up our parents?

Well not me, but yeah. Oh, it wasn't easy either. Oooh, they couldn't stand each other at first. But when we were done with them, perfect couple!

Dean

Perfect?

Yeah.

Dean

They're dead.

I'm sorry but the orders were very clear, you and Sam needed to be born. Your parents were just, uh, meant to be. [Starts singing A Match Made in Heaven. Dean punches him then turns around cradling his hand]

Dean

Son of a bitch. [Hear Cupid fleeing] Where is he? Where'd he go?

Castiel

I believe you upset him.

Dean

Upset him?

Sam

Dean, enough!

Dean

What?

Sam

You just punched a cupid!

Dean

I punched a dick!

Sam

Um... are we going to talk about what's been up with you lately or not?

Dean

Or not. [Storms out]

Castiel

What I don't understand is: where's your hunger Dean?

Dean

Huh?

Castiel

Well, slowly but surely, everyone in this town is falling prey to Famine, but so far you seem unaffected.

Dean

Hey, when I want to drink, I drink. When I want sex, I go get it. Same goes for a sandwich, or a fight.

Castiel

So you're saying you're just well adjusted?

Dean

God no. I'm just well fed.