Dean Winchester quotes from Supernatural

Sam

Dude, you're going 20.

Dean

And?

Sam

That's the speed limit.

Dean

And what, safety's a crime now?

Sam

Dude, where are you going? That was our hotel.

Dean

Sam, I'm not going to make a left-hand turn into oncoming traffic. I'm not suicidal! Did I just say that? That was kinda weird.

Sam

Do you hear something?

Dean

Am I haunted? Am I haunted?!

Dean

Oh, I'm not carrying that. [Sam gives him a look] It could go off. [grabs a flashlight] I'll man the flashlight.

Sam

You do that.

Sam

One...two...three! [Opens locker to reveal a meowing cat]

Dean

[Lets out a long, exceedingly girly scream] That was scary!

Dean

What are we doing?

Sam

We're hunting a ghost.

Dean

A ghost. Exactly. Who does that?

Sam

Us.

Dean

Us, right. And that, Sam, that is exactly why our lives suck. I mean, c'mon, we hunt monsters! What the hell? I mean, normal people, they see a monster and they run. But not us, no no no, we... we search out things that want to kill us! Yeah, huh? Or eat us! You know who does that? Crazy people! We... are insane! You know, then there’s the bad diner food and the--and the skeevy motel rooms and the truck stop waitress with the bizarre rash. I mean, who wants this life, Sam? Huh? Seriously! I mean do you actually like being stuck in a car with me, eight hours a day every single day? I don't think so! I mean, I drive too fast and I listen to the same five albums over and over and over again and I- and I-I sing along, I'm annoying, I know that. And you... you're gassy! You eat half a burrito and you get toxic! I mean, you know what, you can forget it.

Sam

Dean, where're you going?

Dean

Stay away from me Sam, okay? Because I am done with it. I'm done with the monsters and the-and the-and the Hell Hounds and the Ghost Sickness and the damn apocalypse. I'm out. I'm done. I quit.

Sam

Yeah. How you feeling, by the way?

Dean

Fine.

Bobby

You sure, Dean? 'Cause this line of work can get awful scary.

Dean

I'm fine. What? You want to go hunt? I'll hunt... I'll kill anything.

Sam

[playfully] Awwww.

Bobby

[equally playful] He's adorable.

Sam

Really? After that guy choked down all those razor blades?

Dean

It's Halloween, man.

Sam

Yeah. For us, every day is Halloween.

Dean

Don't be a downer. Anything interesting?

Dean

Let me guess. You're here for the, "I told you so."

Castiel

No.

Dean

Well, good, 'cause I'm really not that interested.

Castiel

I am not here to judge you, Dean.

Dean

Then why are you here?

Castiel

Our orders--

Dean

Yeah, you know, I've had about enough of these orders of yours--

Castiel

Our orders were not to stop the summoning of Samhain. They were to do whatever you told us to do.

Dean

Your orders were to follow my orders?

Castiel

It was a test, to see how you would perform under... battlefield conditions, you might say.

Dean

It was a witch, not the Tet Offensive. So I uh- failed your test, huh? I get it. But you know what? If you would have waved that-that magic time traveling wand of yours and we had to do it all over again, I'd make the same call. 'Cause, see, I don't know what's gonna happen when these Seals are broken. Hell, I don't even know what's gonna happen tomorrow. But what I do know is, that this, here? These kids, the swings, the trees? All of it is still here because of my brother and me.

Castiel

You misunderstand me Dean. I'm not like you think, I was praying that you would choose to save the town.

Dean

You were?

Castiel

These people, they're all my Father's creations. They're works of art, and yet, even though you stopped Samhain, the Seal was broken and we are one step closer to Hell on Earth, for all creation. Now, that's not an expression Dean. It's a literal. You, of all people, should appreciate what that means. Can I tell you something, if you promise not to tell another soul?

Dean

Okay.

Castiel

I'm not a... hammer as you say. I have questions, I... I have doubts. I don't know what is right and what is wrong, anymore, whether you passed or failed here. But in the coming months you will have more decisions to make. I don't envy the weight that's on your shoulders, Dean. I truly don't.

Sam

It just doesn't make any sense, Dean. I mean, why would Uriel tell me you remembered Hell, if you didn't?

Dean

Maybe because he's a dick. Might have something to do with it.

Dean

Oh, come on. Aren't you a little bit tempted?

Sam

No. Wouldn't be real. Wouldn't trust it.

Dean

I don't know. That bear seemed pretty real.

Sam

Yeah.

Dean

Come on, if you could wish yourself back, you know, before it all started. Think about it. You'd be some big yuppie lawyer with a nice car and a white picket fence.

Sam

Not what I'd wish for.

Dean

Seriously?

Sam

It's too late to go back to our old lives, Dean. I'm not that guy anymore.

Dean

All right, well, what, then? Hmm? What would Sammy wish for?

Sam

Lilith's head on a plate. Bloody.

Sam

Dean, wake up!

Dean

What? I'm up. What?

Sam

Sleep well?

Dean

Yeah. Tan, rested, and ready.

Sam

Dean, come on, man. You think I can't see it?

Dean

See what?

Sam

The nightmares, the drinking. I'm with you 24/7. I know something's going on.

Dean

Sam, please.

Sam

Uriel wasn't lying, but you are. You remember Hell, don't you?

Dean

What do you want from me, huh? What?

Sam

The truth, Dean. I mean, I'm your brother. I-I just wish you'd talk to me.

Dean

Careful what you wish for.

Sam

Cute.

Dean

Come on, can we stow the couples therapy, huh? We're on a job. I want to work. What do you got? Please?

"Be careful what you wish for." You know who says that? Good looking jerks like you guys, the ones who've got it so easy because you happen to be handsome.

Easy?

Yeah. Women -- Women look at you, right? They notice you.

Sam

Believe us, we do not have it easy.

Dean

We are miserable. We never get what we want. In fact, we have to fight tooth and nail just to keep whatever it is we've got.

Sam

But you know what? Maybe that's the whole point, Wes.

Dean

Yeah, people are people 'cause they're miserable bastards, 'cause they never get what they really want.

Sam

Right, yeah, you get what you want, you get crazy.

Dean

Just take a look at Michael Jackson, hmm? Or Hasselhoff.

Dean

You were right.

Sam

About what?

Dean

I shouldn't have lied to you. I do remember everything that happened to me in the Pit. Everything.

Sam

So, tell me about it.

Dean

No. I won't lie anymore, but I'm not going to talk about it.

Sam

Dean, look, you can't just shoulder this thing alone. You've gotta let me help.

Dean

How? Do you really think that a little heart-to-heart, some sharing and caring, is gonna change anything? Hmm? Somehow... heal me? I'm not talking about a bad day here.

Sam

I know that.

Dean

The things that I saw.... there aren't words. There is no forgetting. There's no making it better. Because it is right here... forever. You wouldn't understand. And I could never make you understand. So I am sorry.

Sam

You're not pissed we're going after the girl; you're pissed Ruby threw us the tip.

Dean

Right, 'cause as far as you're concerned that Hell-bitch is practically family. Boy, something major must have happened while I was downstairs, 'cause I come back and you're--and you're BFF with a demon?

Sam

I told you, Dean, she helped me go after Lilith.

Dean

Well, thanks for the thumbnail. Real vivid. You want to fill in a little detail?

Sam

Sure, Dean, let's trade stories. You first: how was Hell? Don't spare the details.

Dean

That's Revelations.

Since when does the Book of Revelations have jack-o-lanterns?

Dean

It's, a uh... a little-known translation.

Hello again, Dean. Don't you recognize me? Oh, I forgot, I'm wearing a pediatrician. But we were so close... in Hell.

Dean

Alastair?