Sue Thomas: F.B.Eye · Season 1
[Dimitrius and Bobby attempted to fix the air conditioning which would not turn off, however they ended breaking it]
[to Dimitrius] Whatever you've done to the heating system, please undo it. There are only so many layers of clothing one can remove without violating the dress code.
I'm Einstein with a gun. Boston born, Harvard educated, S.W.A.T. trained Myles Leland... III. Now if you'll excuse me, I have a country to save.
Lucy, what do you think? Should I wear my hair up or down?
Up.
Down.
[Lucy stares at Jack. Jack looks away.]
What?
Jack likes your hair down.
You do?
[still uncomfortable] What, can't a guy have an opinion on hair?
Well put, Sparky. Nice to see you're not afraid to show your feminine hairdresser side.
You all need professional help.
[Sue has come directly from a formal gala to the crime scene and is wearing an elegant dress]
If I had known this was going to be a formal crime scene I would have dressed for the occasion.
You wouldn't have looked like that.
[The team has just finished a case in which Jack purposely antagonized a sniper to predict his actions]
Please don't ever make yourself a target again, or I might take you out. [raises her fist]
[laughs and raises his hands in surrender] Okay.
We will hunt him down. We will not rest until this--this vile creature, this destroyer of all that is beautiful and good is brought to justice.
We're looking for an art forger, Myles, not Hannibal Lector.
Only a few gradations of separation on the slimy scale of criminality.
[Myles has just gone over an in-depth plan to catch the art forger who swindled him, complete with map and pointer]
Very thorough. And precise, just the way we like it.
I don't think the invasion at Normandy was this well planned.
[The team has just discovered that Sue and Jack are going undercover as a married couple. The team enters]
And here are the newlyweds now.
[The team begins to throw confetti on Jack and Sue]
Ah, to be young, and in love.
I'm always amazed at how quick word travels in this building...
It's the FBI, the walls have ears.
Speaking of ears, hear that clanging, Sparky? That's the sound of your ball and chain. [Winks at Sue]
Hey, Sue, the boys are going out for a beer after work. Can Jack come?
As long as he's home in time to mow the lawn.
[Myles enters]
What happened?
You missed it. Jack and Sue got married.
I went out for a tuna sandwich, how long was I gone?
[Myles, Bobby and Dimitrius are undercover as movers helping Jack and Sue move into their undercover house. Myles is mildly injured and has supervised rather than moving furniture. They are talking to Jack and Sue]
We're done here.
What he means is that if we have to move one more piece of furniture, we might become terrorists.
So, let's gather up our things and, uh, we'll leave you two love birds alone.
[to Bobby and Dimitrius] You two want to grab that cart. [Bobby and Dimitrius give him a nasty look]. At Aardvark we do not tolerate workers with surly attitudes. This will be going on your permanent records. [walks away]
I can't wait to get my gun back.
[The team has discovered that a terrorist they are investigating has hypothyroidism and takes medication for it]
A martyr who's taking medication so he can live long enough to kill himself, how sick is that.
[Sue and Jack went undercover as a married couple]
I've heard that the traits that originally attract you to a person are the ones that end up driving you nuts. Would either of you care to confirm or deny that rumour?
Nothing could be farther from the truth.
Thank you.
...with Jack it's a whole new set of traits that drive you crazy.
Must be nice to have such a warm and fuzzy outlook on life.
That's just the kind of attitude I'd expect from a guy who goes to bars to meet women!
Our first fight?
Probably not our last.
You're not going with me. I don't need a babysitter.
We can be a team. You can be good cop, I'll be bad cop.
Bobby.
Okay, you be bad cop.
I'm gonna be the cop that leaves--alone.
I'm starting to get the feeling you don't want me to come with you.
Just watch for the vultures circling my desk. I know the second my flight gets its wheels up, somebody'll steal my stapler.
They do, they'll have to answer to me.
Actually, I was talking about you.
How can someone sound cute?
Not to worry Myles, that's a problem you'll never have.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Sue Thomas: F.B.Eye pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.
