Virgil quotes from Static Shock

Yo, bro. What's that? Plans for a particle accelerator?

(sighs) Yeah.

I was kidding. Hey, man, why so down? Isn't it fun being a super brain?

I guess. It's just ... How come I couldn't get a cool power like, super strength or laser vision?

Laser vision?

How am I supposed to fight super villains? Think them into submission? All I can be is your mega mechanic...

Hit him with a web-blast!

Anansi

I am not that kind of spider. (generates a glowing net from his hands) And this is not that kind of web.

How do you know that?

I looked it up in my Crime Database Computer Index.

Whoe, ur, hold up. What Crime Database Computer Index?

I cross-indexed all newspaper crime reports from the last 20 years--about 852,000,000 items in all.

And it really works?

Would you ask Batman that question?

No, but he's a famous Caped Crusader with his own Batmobile and Batplane. You are a sophomore with a pocket protector.

This looks like a job for...

Don't finish that sentence, V. Superman already owns the rights.

Morris

Boy, don't be dissing Soul Power. Those hats are deadly.

Come on Mr. Grant, how dangerous can a hat be?

Oh leave the boy alone, Morris. And quit interrupting, I keep hoping maybe this time that arrogant Soul Power gets it in the chops.

Morris

(turns to Dennis) Dennis, I'm this close to giving you a knuckle sandwich. (Turns back to Virgil) Just keep reading, Sparky, and give it some 60's groove. You kids today have no sense of style. Why back in my day...

...Not again...

Morris

...Cars were faster, threads were finer, and the girls were foxy.

(exasperated at Morris' pre-occupation with the 60's) Ohh.

Morris

(lost in the past) Umm, umm.

That's it, (looks at watch,) lunch break.

Morris

Hey. You're not done with Soul Power.

Trust me, I'm done with Soul Power.

Sharon, You gotta let me go home, please.

Sharon

(exasperated with Virgil) What's wrong now?

It's Mr. Grant, he's making me crazy.

Sharon

Virgil, you said you'd come here to the retirement home to help me, now you wanna leave short-handed. What kind of help is that?!

But, I...

Sharon

This community service, Virgil, it's your duty as a citizen. Besides, you could learn a few things from the older generation. (walks away)

(calls after her) Like what? How to annoy people?!

(reporter on the TV) We interrupt the broadcast for a special report. A major crime is in progress at the Dakota Museum of Technology. It began just moments ago...

(quietly) Looks like it's time for my kind of community service.

Goodbye old folks, hello...

Morris

(opens the door to the roof) ...Static

(still without his mask on) Mr. Grant?!...

Ahh, well I guess you're wondering, 'what's with the costume,' well, I... umm...

Don't sweat it boy, I knew you were Static when I first met you

What... You did?

Morris

Yep, (moves his hand in front of and around Virgil/Static, causing electrical energy to become visible) I could feel the electrical field around you.

Whoa... How'd you do that?

Morris

Because I have a secret identity too. Here, this should help you recognize me. (puts on a mask)

(doesn't recognize him) You're...the Lone Ranger?!

Morris

No. It's me, Soul Power.

(disbelief) What?!.

And you're gonna take me with you to that museum.

Whoa man are you trippin'--why would I do a whack thing like that?!

Because if you don't, I'll tell all my friends I met a real superhero today; Virgil Hawkins.

Bad enough She-Bang keeps butting in when we're on patrol, but Shenice won't let us alone neither.

You're telling me. She was so busy describing the new curtains for the gas station, she followed me right into the boys' restroom. (in a higher-pitched voice) She thought that could use new curtains too.

(to Eddie) Remember me? Virgil?

Yes, 'the vinegar-and-baking-soda-bomber'.

Heh. That stuff pretty much washed out, didn't it?

Yeah, I'm on spring break from college. I graduated high school early 'cause, you know, I'm a genius.

We know, man, we were there.

Man, look at him go!

Robert

You know, I was once pretty fast on the field myself.

Pops, was that back during the Jurassic age or are we talking past lives here?

Sharon

Virgil!

You shrieked?

Sharon

You didn't take the garbage out last night.

Is that what smells? I figured you were trying a new recipe.

Sharon

You have to help with the chores!

I do help with the chores!

Sharon

No. You say you'll help. Then you disappear. 'Poof'!

Well, I wouldn't say 'poof'. It's more like ... zoom.