Static quotes from Static Shock

For a rookie you did well Static, but I can tell you'll be a handful when you finally join the League.

I'm sorry; did you say when I join the League?

Anything is possible... when you're a little older.

But remember, I get first dibs on the pizza.

Static, you alright?

Rubber-Band Man? Watch where your going!

I was. Can't say the same for you 'Mr. Hand-Stand Man.'

I was in complete control up there 'Sir Stretch-A-Lot.'

Anybody wants to help out a young, gifted, and about-to-be-squashed hero, now would be the time.

(flying in) I'll take that offer! (Superman saves Static by holding cymbals of giant musical monkey apart) Need some help getting this monkey off your back, Static?

Don't move! Anybody!

A slingshot and a ping-pong ball? What's that gonna do?

That 'ping-pong ball' packs enough energy to take out the entire block. Trust me. I created it.

You know, you need a new hobby!

The house specialty, the abandoned burrito of solitude. One bite, and you'll need to be alone!

She-Bang

(sighs) No, thanks.

She must really be down, I'm using my best jokes!

Maybe that's what's depressin' her.

Goodbye old folks, hello...

Morris

(opens the door to the roof) ...Static

(still without his mask on) Mr. Grant?!...

Ahh, well I guess you're wondering, 'what's with the costume,' well, I... umm...

Don't sweat it boy, I knew you were Static when I first met you

What... You did?

Morris

Yep, (moves his hand in front of and around Virgil/Static, causing electrical energy to become visible) I could feel the electrical field around you.

Whoa... How'd you do that?

Morris

Because I have a secret identity too. Here, this should help you recognize me. (puts on a mask)

(doesn't recognize him) You're...the Lone Ranger?!

Morris

No. It's me, Soul Power.

(disbelief) What?!.

And you're gonna take me with you to that museum.

Whoa man are you trippin'--why would I do a whack thing like that?!

Because if you don't, I'll tell all my friends I met a real superhero today; Virgil Hawkins.

Hey, how'd you get to be a superhero, anyway?

Soul Power

It all started in the early 60's; I was just a normal cat until I got in the way of some thugs who wanted to crash Hoover Dam, transformer blew, giving me the strength of 10 turbines. I fought all sorts of scum back in my day, but the worst of them all was my arch-enemy, Professor Menace.

(mockingly) Professor Menace? What, was the name 'Dr. Bad-Dude' already taken.

Soul Power

Laugh all you want kid, but Menace came this close to taking over the world. Back in 63, we had our last big battle; I had just about beat him when he suddenly stepped back, hit a switch and his whole lab exploded. I got out okay, but I never did find any trace of him.

A bad guy who wants to rule the world, ahh, that's original. Was he gonna do it all by himself or did he have help?

Soul Power

He used robots, exactly like the ones at the museum.

What?

Soul Power

That's why I had to come with you, those robots on TV once belonged to Professor Menace. (jumps onto the powerline cables) Ride on.

Hey, come back here. (flies after him)

After all these years, I can't believe it.

Soul Power

Believe it Phil, I'm back and I need your help, I want access to your satellites.

I'm sorry Soul Power, but I can't allow that unless your a government approved client.

Soul Power

Look, years ago, you were a young man who used to call me his idol, now your the powerful Mr. Rollins, head of this big defense satellite firm; don't tell me your too high-and-mighty to help out an old friend.

Times have changed Soul Power, everything these days is about security clearance. I can't do it.

Soul Power

Back in the 60's, I fought so that young men like you would have a chance to get to this position.

You also taught us never to brake rules, and I won't, not even for you. Besides, aren't you too old for this sort of thing.

Soul Power

Your never too old to fight for justice.

(quietly) Ohh... That's debatable.

Now what?

Soul Power

Back to the Power-Pad...

Soul Power

I need to tap into those top-secret satellites.

You stole his security card?!

Soul Power

You know how things cling to you have static electricity.

Ah. Right on.

(About Batman) He learnt science from noble laureates, martial arts from kung-fu masters and manners from a crocodile.

So he's a little harsh sometimes.

Sometimes?!

He's teaching you, making sure you would be ready for whatever. I think you're pretty lucky.

Batman's not gonna be happy when he hears how you've been treating his guest and you really don't want to see Batman unhappy.

First, we don't have guests here. And, second, I'm Batman.

And I'm Beyonce.

Well, whoever you are, you don't belong here.

And you're Bruce Wayne, aren't you? But you're so ...

Old? No big surprise, considering that you just hop-scotched forty years!

Kobra has captured one of the world's greatest heroes. He's someone with the power to change the future.

How great can this guy be if he got captured by a bunch of snake people?

He's you, Virgil.

You've seen what I can do! You're still mad about that little go-around we had!

(defensively) This has nothing to do with that!