[upon learning about wishing wells] You mean suckers throw money down a well for fun? That's the greatest scam ever!
Can we have our quarter back now?
“Wishing You Well” · Season 4
In this episode: Abrasive SpongeBob (3), Patrick (2), Squidward (2), Mr. Krabs (2), Harold (1)
Could you not stand so close? You're making me claustrophobic.
What does "claustrophobic" mean?
It means he's afraid of Santa Claus!
No it doesn't!
HO, HO, HO! [giggles]
Stop it, Patrick! You're scaring him!
HO, HO, HO! [giggles]
It's not working, Patrick.
Darn.
[shoves Patrick] Stop pushing me Patrick.
You mean like this? [shoves Squidward]
No like this! [shoves Patrick]
[both Patrick and Squidward are fighting] You shouldn't fight in here. This is a magical place.
[Scene zooms to outside the well]
Patrick, get off of me! [scene zooms back into the well where Patrick is sitting on Squidward] I told you I am claustrophobic!
Nice try, Squidward, but there's no Santa Claus here.
Patrick!
You'll never get me to believe in magic, never! Just to prove it to ya, I'll demonstrate. [dropping a penny in the well] I wish I was steamed and served with a side of melted butter! [laughs]
Mr. Krabs, NOOOOOOO!!!!!!!
Well, where's your magic now? [disappears into thin air and appears as a real steamed crab on a plate] Oh... where am I? What's going on here? [A person behind him lays out melted butter and puts on a bib reading "THE END"] Uh-oh. I do believe in magic! I do believe in magic! I do believe in magic! Oh, no!
[episode ends]
These quotes come from Wikiquote's SpongeBob SquarePants pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.