TV show quotes
[After crashing with the Romford thugs]
[To the leader] You bloody idiot! Have you any idea how much this car cost? Why don't you piss off back to Romford where you belong. You little prick! Eh? Eh?
[He turns; the others have sneaked up behind him, like the Raptors in Jurassic Park.]
[Darkly] Clever boys.
[The thugs give Duane a good kicking]
[Tim, Mike and Brian are trying to persuade Marsha not to sell the house]
Okay, listen. When we get there, let me do the talking, okay? I am the only one here capable of serious communication. [Instantly regretful] Sorry, sorry! That sounded bad. I didn't mean to suggest that you're not good communicators, okay Mike?
[Mike grunts non-verbally]
Brian?
[Brian whimpers non-verbally]
Marsha, they say the family of the twenty-first century is made up of friends, not relatives. If that's true, then you're the best auntie I've ever had.
Aren't you going to ask us how it went?
How did it go?
Really badly.
Colin's gone.
What?
He went next door.
Oh, Daisy, I'm so sorry. How did it happen?
[Bemused]... He walked.
Right, right, sorry. See, my mum used to use "going next door" as a euphemism for being dead.
Whoa, hold on, does that mean my rabbit's dead?
It's been eighteen years, Mike, where did you think he was?
[whimpers] Next door!
[Daisy exits the house; Tim follows her a moment later with a baby in his arms]
I think she's filled her nappy again. Will you change her?
I made the tea!
I went to the shop!
I was in labour for fifteen hours!
You win!
[They kiss]
Love you.
I know.
[They turn to go back inside]
Come on, Luke.
Tim, we're not calling her 'Luke'.
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