“Fight or fright (Episode 60)” quotes from Red vs Blue

I'm telling you it was here! It drove by while you were talking, you had your back turned and it went zoom right behind you!

Well it really sounded like, (Starts to make a bad impersonation of the tank, along with some fake screaming).

That's not the important part of the story, Donut!

Sarge

(sarcastically) Sure, Simmons, I believe you. You saw an enormous tank that appeared miraculously, and then just as quickly disappeared. And you're the only one that can see it. Just like signs of Donut's heterosexuality!

No I'm not! Donut saw it!

Yeah!

Sarge

Donut's impressionable. He'd agree with anything you said.

Yeah!

Sarge

Aw hell, he'd eat a spoonful of dirt if you told him it tasted like chocolate!

*gasp!* That's not true!

Sarge

Heh heh, so that's where you draw the line?

No, I mean, it's not true that dirt tastes like chocolate.. right?, seriously right?

Okay, well Grif saw it too, we all saw it!

(lying) I don't know what you are talking about, I didn't see a damn thing.

What?

Well, think about it. While our Ambassador here is either being a) eaten by the alien, or b) digested by the alien, you and I can sneak back in and get our bodies.

I would make an excellent Ambidasdor, (looks at Tucker) because I am very shy!

Get away from me freak!

You know, if that word's too hard to pronounce, you can just call yourself bait.

You know, we could've taken that alien out if I'd have hit him just a few more times.

A few more times? How about one time?

Well, I think I landed at least two or three shots.

Yeah, right.

You didn't hit anything but the wall.

How the hell would you know? You were running straight backwards.

This is a long range weapon, okay? I need distance to use it effectively.

Where were you planning on shooting him from? The fucking moon? If you'd have backed up any further, you woulda had to mail him the bullets!