My Gym Partner's a Monkey Season 1 quotes

What just happened?

[while Adam runs away] Pants! Pants! Pants! Pants! I lost my Pants!

This is Principal Pixiefrog with another fun-filled announcement: You're all expelled!!! [a zebra faints] Just kidding, just a little principal's joke. Ok, now for the real announcment.

Who's having a birthday party?

I am.

Oh, it is going to be like the one you had in first grade? Where you wet your pants and cried.

No, that's not going to happen again.

Why? Are you going to wear a stupid diaper? What other stupid stuff are you going to do? Invite your stupid animal friends? I'm sure they'll do something to make you look stupid.

[to Adam] Don't listen to Chad. He's just [pauses] stupid.

Uh, Jake. That's not popcorn. It's asbestos.

[continues to eat asbestos, which is actually bat guano] I don't speak Greek, but whatever it is, needs more butter.

I've been in a bubble my whole life. Before it was cool.

How are you feeling now, sport?

Gee, Kerry, you look great in your slamming cammies and face protector. [A doorbell is heard, walks to the front door and opens it, revealing Jake, Slips, and Windsor all standing in the doorway; surprised] Huh?!

Hey, Adam!

What are you guys doing here?

What are we doing here? Oh, good one, Adam. Don't you remember six weeks ago when we passed each other in the hall, and we right before you were almost out of earshot, I whispered that we should have a sleepover at your house tonight?

No. (I don't remember that.)

Oh. Well, don't worry about it. [he, Slips, and Windsor enter the house] We're here, and that's what counts.

Pizza isn't just complete without toppings. [adds bugs to Adam's slice of pizza]

[impersonating Principal Pixiefrog's voice on the phone] Hello, this is Principal Pixiefrog, we will just let you know we will be cancelling school next week.

Hey Ingrid, nice glitter.

Ingrid

Thanks. It's actually embedded in my corneas.

[sighs] Boys are more trouble than they're worth, aren't they?

Uh-huh! You said it, sister! Come on, girlfriends. Let's dance!!!

Hey Adam, you know what I want to be?

Umm, let me guess. A zoo animal.

No way! I want to be an underwear model.

I almost hate to ask, but why?

'Cause I've always wanted to see what it's like to wear underwear.

But you don't even wear pants.

Look Adam; Every time I see a monkey on T.V., he's either naked or wearing diapers. It's time for me to step up and blaze a new trail for simians everywhere! And that trail happens to involve [deepens his voice] big boy pants!

Uh, Jake? I don't have any music in there.

Then where'd you get that--

Exclusive Truffles Duvall pre-release? That's for us to know, and for you to wait seven more weeks until it's released to the mass market.

Um, hi. I don't believe we've met. [sticks out his hand] I'm Adam. Okay. And just who are you? [Jake slaps him] Ow!

Don't sass them, Adam, they haven't in with Truffles.

Did you just ask who we are?

Yeah, you heard me. Who are- [Jake slaps him again] Ow!

Keep it quiet, Adam, they're the cool kids.

[climbing up] Forgot my tape recorder.

You still use a tape recorder? That is so garage sale. [pushes Adam down the mountain]

Excuse you.

Jake, you need to drop the cool act for one second and listen. I have something you need to hear. [plays the tape recorder]

[through recorder] That spidermonkey kid is so low watt. Like he hasn't figured that the only reason we invited him into our gang is because he's good at picking arc ticks.

[through recorder] Yeah, stupid was so much 2004. [laughter is heard as Jake whimpers sadly over hearing this] Shh, quiet, someone's coming.

[through recorder] Forgot my tape recorder. [stops the recorder]

[heartbroken] This… is… Is that true? Those guys were just using me?

I'm afraid so.

Hey, guys. What's going on? [notices Jake's bubble gum act] What are you doing, Jake?

Practicing my act for the talent show.

Uh, Jake, didn't you get banned from the talent show for what you did last year?

[offended as the bubble gum bubbles pop from his ears] Thanks for bursting my bubble by bringing that up, Windsor.

What happened last year?

Let's just say the bubbles came out somewhere else-- somewhere horrible.