[after Hodge insults her outfit] He did it!
Natalie, he's not even a suspect!
Damn!
“Mr. Monk Goes to a Fashion Show” · Season 4, Episode 10
In this episode: Natalie Teeger (7), Adrian Monk (5), Lt. Randall Disher (3), Captain Leland Stottlemeyer (2)
[Monk, Natalie, Stottlemeyer and Disher visit Hodge's fashion house to talk to him. Hodge advances on Natalie]
JHJulian Hodge
If you're gonna rob me, you should bring a gun.
Pardon me?
JHJulian Hodge
The blouse. It's a knock-off of one of my designs.
Oh. It is? I didn't know.
JHJulian Hodge
Of course. That's not the real crime. The real crime is how you look in it.
[Natalie, wearing a black dress and sunglasses, approaches Randy, who is standing with one foot on a rock, his elbow on his knee, and his head on his fist, gazing off over the water]
What are you doing?
Standing. This is how I stand. What are you wearing?
Clothes. This is how I dress.
This is how I stand.
This is how I dress.
[Monk and Natalie cut in line trying to get into Julian Hodge's fashion show while searching for Julie.]
I'm on the list.
SGSecurity guard
Name?
Puff Daddy, plus 1.
[during the show] Natalie! Don't eat the food back there. I just saw two of the models throwing up!
[Julian Hodge has been arrested for murder and he is being led away in handcuffs]
JHJulian Hodge
[to Natalie] So, it's true what they say, huh? You can never judge a person by how they dress.
Well, let me tell you about what you're going to be wearing. I hope you like orange. It's a little jumpsuit thing, it has a number right here. You can wear it anywhere, really. Indoors, walking around the yard...
[Monk, Natalie, Stottlemeyer and Disher are looking over the evidence from the Clea Vance murder case at the crime lab]
HGHoward "Gordo" Gordon
Is there any new evidence?
No. Monk met the killer's mother.
She's a shirt inspector.
She swears he's innocent.
HGHoward "Gordo" Gordon
I know. That's the toughest part of the job, the mothers crying and pleading. That's one thing I'm not gonna miss!
Where are you going?
HGHoward "Gordo" Gordon
Didn't you hear? I'm retiring! There's a party for me on Friday if you wanna come.
Cool, absolutely! I'll be there.
You're retiring? How old are you?
HGHoward "Gordo" Gordon
46.
[in disbelief] Did you win the lottery?
HGHoward "Gordo" Gordon
No, I've been investing. Real estate. What have you been doing with your savings?
Uhhhhhhhhhhh, eating. You know, I think I need to talk to my accountant.
What, you have an accountant?
Nope. Gonna have to go find an accountant, then I'm gonna talk to him.
[Natasia Zorelle has been discovered dead in her apartment. Gordo is dusting a glass for fingerprints when Monk, Natalie, Stottlemeyer and Disher come in]
How's it look, Gordo?
HGHoward "Gordo" Gordon
Oh, looks like suicide, smells like suicide. Primary's on suicide. She drained two of those bottles and around 30 sleeping pills.
Were those prescription?
HGHoward "Gordo" Gordon
Probably not.
[to Randy] We'll check with her doctor. Make a note.
I'll remember. [Randy is wearing an expensive suit, due to Hodge's comment about his attitude getting way over his head]
Where's your notebook?
Oh, I didn't bring it. It's an Italian suit, it was ruining the lining. But don't worry. [points to his head] I'll remember it. [He gazes at a mirror and tries to readjust the lining, but Natalie moves in front of him and blocks his view]
Am I in your way?
HGHoward "Gordo" Gordon
[to Monk] She probably got depressed after you spoke to her. All those memories about the murder bubbling up.
You know, I don't think so. One set of fingerprints on the glass.
HGHoward "Gordo" Gordon
Well yeah, they're hers.
But look, she's wearing lipstick. There's no lipstick on the glass. Somebody wiped down the glass, and then put it back in her hand. [Stottlemeyer turns and addresses all of the other cops and CSI techs in the room]
Okay! This is now a homicide investigation! Lock this joint down, nobody touches anything! [turning to Randy] Fabio, go and borrow a notebook, and borrow a pencil, and start talking to neighbors!
Captain, what do you think it means?
It means that your boss scared somebody.
[Monk and Natalie are observing Julie before the rehearsal for Hodge's show]
She looks beautiful, doesn't she? Too beautiful. Sometimes I wish she had a big old fat ugly wart right here. [points to her forehead]
[puts his finger right above the bridge of Natalie's nose] Maybe here.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Monk pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.