I'm really adopted, aren't I?
No, you're ours, and we love you.
Damn!
You know, Francis, we never actually intended to show that letter to Mom. We were just trying to scare you.
I know, you guys would never do that to me.
But if she did see the letter, you know it was an accident, right?
Yeah, but Richie has the letter. Please tell me Richie has the letter.
Richie has coupons. Mom has the letter. But like I said, it was just an accident. I swear.
So the thing you were threatening to do all day but had no intention of doing you did, but didn't mean to?
They have a fake letter. I knew Francis wouldn't leave us alone without getting something, and I knew you'd give it away. I knew exactly what everyone would do.
So where's the real letter?
I had to think of the one place they'd never think of looking. I had to give it to the one person they'd never think I'd give it to. I did the most brilliant thing of all: I gave it to Dewey.
And I hid it under Mom's pillow.
You WHAT?!
[A sick Lois is seen sitting up on her bed. She is shocked by the contents of the letter detailing Francis' prank to both a prestige university and Marlin Academy.]
[A sick Lois is sitting on the bed now realizing that today is Monday. Because she is caught up with her flu and Francis' prank to Marlin Academy, she has ignored punishing the boys for skipping school]
I'm gonna kill him. I'm gonna kill him. I am going to kill him!
OOOOOOHH, this is all a dream.
Oh, shut up, Reese!
Malcolm': Mom, stop it. You're sick.
I'm too mad to be sick. You know he's finally done it this time. Where is that brochure for the work farm in Arizona?
[Lois goes through a drawer on her nightstand for the work farm in Arizona for troubled teens. The boys are no more troubled when Lois brings it out and realize where Francis may be heading next.]
He thinks Military school is tough. Just wait.... Wait.... wait... wait... wait...
[She heads to the bathroom to throw up.]
You know, Francis, we never actually intended to show that letter to Mom. We were just trying to scare you.
I know, you guys would never do that to me.
But if she did see the letter, you know it was an accident, right?
Yeah, but Richie has the letter. Please tell me Richie has the letter.
Richie has coupons. Mom has the letter. But like I said, it was just an accident. I swear.
So the thing you were threatening to do all day but had no intention of doing you did, but didn't mean to?
Yeah. You can yell at us now.
No, I guess I deserved it. I shouldn't have ratted on you. Mom was pressuring me and I folded. She told me if I wanted to come home for the summer I had to tell her about the bike.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Malcolm in the Middle pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.