Lupin quotes from Lupin III

Okay, so who've you ticked off?

No one.

[to Lupin] He's got a point. I mean, you're the annoying one on this team.

So, Goemon, what do you say I handle this one?

And why?

I'm just saying, in case it is a personal thing, I mean, you know...

That maybe I would... lose control?

No, not at all. Come on, Goemon. Don't take it personally, okay?

Just tell me. Is there something you're not saying?

No. What in the hell could I possibly know about him?

[bursting into Lupin's room] Hey, Lupin, we've got a problem. [To his dismay, he finds the young man snoring away in bed] Oh, man. Look at him. [He opens the curtains, then shakes Lupin gently on the shoulder] Hey, buddy, get out of bed. It's lunchtime. [Lupin sleeps blissfully on] Wouldn't you know it? Dead to the world. I swear to God, this guy could sleep through World War friggin' Three. Sorry, man, but I'm afraid you leave no alternative. Gotta bring out the heavy artillery. Hey, Fujiko! Put on some clothes!

Huh?! Where?! Tell me! Come on!

[throwing the cover off] She's not here, Lupin.

What the-? Hey! That's low! I'll get you. Just you wait.

Hey, hey Romeo. We only got till tomorrow at noontime.

Thanks, mom. Don't wait up for me now. I can let myself in.

Crap! [He checks his watch] Huh? How the hell did I sleep so late? Damn it. Some kind of a lookout. I must be getting old, or something. [He hears Lupin's laughter behind him] Lupin! Listen, man. I have no idea know how this happened. I mean, one minute, I'm scoping out the plaza down there, and the next thing I know...

[calming him down] It's okay. Ratboy's been working for us all night.

What? The rat? Working for us?

Yeah, and he's not half bad, either. I mean, you know, for a super-annoying, ugly little pimple-beaked freakazoid. So, that crate pretty comfortable?

[laughing at the ridiculous situation while also hearing Ratboy's laugh] Oh, brother. Does he always laugh like that?

I'm afraid so.

Uh, Lupin?

Yeah?

Knock, knock.

Who's there?

Land shark!

[pinkies cuffed] Hey, Jigen, wait! Give me a hand here!

Damn, how the hell did that happen?

Look, handle yourself. I'd better go.

Hey! Get back here! [He goes over to Zenigata and fishes for a keyring. He finds to his disappointment that there are lots of keys]

This is bad for our reputation. I mean, if anything, she kidnapped us!

Well if you ask me, I'm not sure that's much better for our reputation.

Leave this to me. You go get the girl.

ALIIICE!

LUPIIIN!

Slow down, would ya?

I can't!

What do you mean, you can't?

Hey, the friggin' brakes are out!

See?

What? Well, don't just tap 'em!

I'm not just tapping! Look!

Then how come it's not stopping?

Because... the brakes... ARE OUT!

Call me superstitious, but next time you're thinking about that broad, don't actually say her name out loud, okay?

[from down below] Lupin!

Huh?

No!

Hey!

Don't say it!

It's Fujiko!

Aw, crap.

[tossing the bubble maker up and down in her hand] So tell me, did you invent this, or did you steal it?

Well, I guess that depends on which one would really impress you.

I guess... I'd have to say if you invented it.

[leaning in for a kiss] Okay, then let's just say that I invented it, shall we?

[holding up the pin-like tracking device Lupin planted in her hair] Okay.

Then you can just make yourself a new one.

But, Fujiko...!

[mockingly] What? You didn't lie, did you?

Of course I diiiid!

Don't worry, Lupin! I'll catch you!

MOMMYYYYY!

Listen, Commander, I really wish you all the best with this big bloodbath of yours, but, unfortunately, I'm not going to be sticking around.

Ah, I understand. Well, it's up to you. But I should warn you, the only way out of here is up those steps over there.

[in his imagination] Help me! Ahh! Help! Help me, please! I really don't wanna die! Help me, please! Please, stop! I'm too young to die! And too handsome, and charming, and...

But, hey, if you have to go, you have to go. I totally respect that.

[hopefully] And you're sure that's the only, only way? There's no, like, camel taxi or anything?

Damn. I haven't felt so trapped and helpless since the last time I went to Disneyland. But at least when I was at Disneyland, nobody ever forced me to share a teacup with Goofy.

You'll be sharing a cell with rats when I get you back to Japan!

Yeah, well, be that as it may... It'll be the land of the setting sun for you if you stick around here and end up in the middle of some revolutionary uprising.

But... What about my poor mother?!