[upon entering the old subway tunnels where the team has set up shop] YOU GOT ME A BATCAVE? [jumping around excitedly] A BATCAVE!
NNate
No, I did not.
Yeah, this is totally a Batcave. Okay, you guys suck a little less now.
All S1
S1 E15Unfinished Business
[Hardison and Chaos finish explaining something technical]
Can I hit him?
Which one?
Either one.
Eliot [turning to Sophie]: See, it's not just me.
Wow, you are, like, super old. Maybe later you can tell us about that time you punched Hitler in the face! Parker, still yummy.
ALArchie Leach
[shoves the end of his cane under Cha0s' chin] I own two canes. One has a taser capable of releasing ten thousand volts. The other extends a six-inch stiletto blade.
Which one is [gulps] is this?
ALArchie Leach
I can't seem to remember. I am super old.
[Later]
What is with this 'sir'? Are you picking her up for the prom? 'Cause Parker in a prom dre--AAAAAAH!
[who has just zapped Cha0s with his cane] Hmm, I guess it was the taser.
I love tasers.
How long before video nails us?
Facial recognition software takes about seven minutes to tag us, give or take.
[Alarm blares on]
Seven min-- Damn it, Hardison!
What part of "give or take" do you clearly not understand?
[Over the comm] You better be ready, Quinn.
I bet you were born ready, right? Come on, dude. I know you want to say it. [With a graveled voice] "I was born ready."
I don't know how Eliot does this.
VDVictor Dubenich
You didn't kill the man who let your son die.
NNate
My son would be ashamed of me if I turned into a killer.
VDVictor Dubenich
Yes...right.
NNate
[points the gun at him] My father, on the other hand, would buy me an ice cream.
NNate
I have plans...oh so many plans.
I don't have a lot of rules in this world. Three, actually: Don't count the money until after the con, know when to walk away from the con.
NNate
The Gambler? You're basing your life philosophy on a Kenny Rogers song?
You made it impossible for Hardison to hack us with a computer so he hacks us with a clam?
They are ready for your kung fu. They are completely unprepared for my drunken mastery.
Hardison [when Cha0s proves him wrong]: Wow. This must be how Eliot feels. I just realized this is how he feels all the time. I just want to hit something.
NNate
My wife? You recruited my wife as your backup?
Ex! He never says ex-wife.
I always do.
You underestimate me.
Last time I underestimated you I was right.
Next time give me the gun. I'll be your Huckleberry.
I love that movie.
Who the hell doesn't?
You don't want to kill me. It was him. He blackmailed me into helping him.
No.
You let me go, I'll make it up to you, I swear.
NNate
Oh, you're saying kill Dubenich and let you go?
Yes. Yes.
NNate
Hang it on him?
Yes.
NNate
Oh, yes, ex-con with fraud convictions, make him the fall guy. You get a bunch of lawyers and start over. I see how that could all work out for you. It's pretty perfect, because with Dubenich dead, there'd be nobody to contradict your story, right? So all your problems would be solved.
That's right! You kill me, he starts over! He's the CEO of a powerful company. He could do a lot of harm to a lot of people. Nate. He sent your father into the warehouse.
[Nate turns the gun on Latimer]
NNate
So kill Latimer and let you go? Yeah, well, that way, I mean, there would be no one to tie you to the illegal trades. And, I mean, you're smart. You'd find the cash and the diamonds that he hid. So with Latimer dead, you'd go free. But the problem that I'm having with all of this is if only one of you dies, the other will go free! I got five bullets! Who would like to go first?
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