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A character in Legends of Tomorrow

Ray Palmer quotes from Legends of Tomorrow

Played by Brandon Routh · 100 quotes · page 5 of 7

Ray Palmer

2nd most-quoted character in Legends of Tomorrow: in 100 of its 388 quotes
Most scenes with: Sara Lance (29), Dr. Nate Heywood (27), Mick Rory (26)

Scenes with Ray Palmer 97

[Ray and Zari open the closet to find the baby Dominator]

Leave it to young you to see the best in that thing. Though you were pretty lonely.

Ray

What? I wasn't lonely! I was just choosing to focus on my studies. This is probably just my scientific curiosity getting the better of me, again.

[Microwave beeps]

Young Ray

[off-screen] Popcorn's ready!

Aren't you supposed to be in school?

Ray

Oh my God.

Yeah, this is a problem.

Ray

No. Yesterday, I was shoplifting. Today I'm a truant. This thing is turning me into Rory.

Ray

You sure you want do this? Break up Firestorm?

Well, I'm sure Gray wants off the ship, and I'm sure that can't happen if we're still bonded with each other, so...

Ray

Yeah, but your bond isn't just physical. You guys have been psychically bonded for over three years.

Yeah, and it's been no picnic, let me tell you. Last time I got laid, afterward Gray said to me: "Well done, Jefferson". I mean...

Ray

I could've done without knowing that.

What happened?

[inside Jax's body] Yes. Pray tell, Doctor Palmer, what exactly happened to us, because it seems we are in a particularly precarious situation that I, for one, have no idea how to remedy.

[inside Stein's body] Why don't we just merge?

[inside Jax] Out of the question! Absolutely not. We have switched bodies. Who knows what else may have shifted. Merging now could cause a meltdown of insurmountable proportions. We just... we just can't afford the risk.

[Nate laughs hysterically, partly due to lack of sleep.]

[still amused, pointing to Jax] You're the Professor, [points to Stein] and you're Jax. [starts laughing again] They switched.

[to herself] Must be Tuesday.

[Amaya and Zari enter the room.]

What's going on?

Ray

Oh, we seem to have a bit of a Freaky Friday situation

[inside Stein] I'm Jax

[inside Jax] And I'm Martin.

Cool.

I thought the Helen of Troy story was just a myth.

Ray

Well, we found that myths tend to have some truth about them. This one more than most.

Helen and her lover Paris set off a ten-year war that launched thousands of ships and set tens of thousands of men off to their death. All in the name of her beauty.

You make it sound like it's her fault. Men always find a reason to fight. That's not on her.

Depends. How hot is she?

[turning away from everyone else] I mean, she's all right. [mouthing whisper to Mick] She's really hot.

Ray

Look, I'm sure it's not easy learning that your granddaughter is in league with Damien Darhk. If you ever want to talk about it...

What happened to men? When did you all start talking about your feelings?

Ray

Uh... early nineties?

DRDick Rory

They say life is the sum total of all the choices you make. As your misfortune sinks in, maybe you want to ask yourself: "What choices did I make to find myself here?" Today, I want payback for what that monster did to my men, my brothers.

Ray

Uh, excuse me–

Shut up.

Ray

We're... we're journalists–

Shut up.

Ray

And we've uncovered a plot to kill President Johnson. We need to alert the proper authorities.

DDick

Shut up.

See?

He's telling the truth.

The president landed in Vietnam, but we can still save him.

DDick

You're reporters. What are you gonna do? Question him to safety?

Ray

It's a little more complicated than that, but just trust me, okay? We're the good guys.

DDick

Haven't you heard? There are no good guys here.

Man, can you believe Sara? She doesn't trust me around young Stein!

So you're saying you weren't planning on warning Martin about him dying?

Okay, fine. But c'mon man. Gray dies, and then all of a sudden his younger self gets displaced in time?

I know, it's crazy that we keep bumping into ourselves.

Yeah.

I mean, Ray and the baby Dominator, and Sir Stein and his killer 'stache?

Mick's dad. I mean, this can't just be a coincidence. [Amaya and Ray walk in] What if this is fate's way of saying we should step up? That we can actually improve things?

Martin made his choice, Jax. We should be honoring his sacrifice, not trying to undo it.

Yeah, but it's Gray. I mean, how can we not tell him?

Ray

Because what if knowing about his death makes young Marty choose not to create the Firestorm matrix? Or meet you? Or step foot on the ship? He never would've wanted you to risk the present to save him in the past.

And how exactly do you know what he would've wanted, Ray? You weren't psychically connected to him for three years!

[The others are talking while Mick is trying to watch his first live football game in three years.]

Z, will you please tell her that talking to Kuasa is a bad idea?

No.

Thank you. I refuse to accept that my granddaughter is pure evil.

Fine. She's eighty-nine percent evil.

Ray

Guys! I think Sara is in trouble.

QUIET!! Haircut! Take the new girl. Find Blondie, Fake Snart and Trenchcoat. Amaya, the med-bay. Pretty, the library. Water Bitch? Stays in the freezer.

[Chastened and somewhat intimidated, the others leave for their assignments.]

Ray

You know, Mick? You're really showing some management potential.

Get out. [Ray gets out.]

[Zari has barricaded herself in the Parlor with the bomb.]

[emotional] Mick. You don't have to hide what you love. Follow your heart and keep writing.

Zari! We don't have time for this!

Nate and Amaya. I'm so lucky to call you guys my friends.

Zari, the bomb!

What you guys have is so... so special. I mean, the way you look at each other... honestly, it makes me wanna puke, but... don't fight it. You're crazy about each other. Just don't have sex on missions.

Ray

Z, what are you doing?

What you would do, Ray. You know, when I first came on board, you were so nice and polite to me that I wanted to punch you. But I realize now, the world would be a better place if we were all a little more like you. But being nice and polite's only gonna get you so far, so do me a favor and tell Sara why you're so afraid of her.

Ray

Okay. Sure. But first, I wanna figure out how to shut down the force field so we can deal with the bomb.

I am dealing with the bomb.

Zari, look, you need to listen to me...

Sara, you're an infuriating, stubborn, pain in my ass. Because you have to be. You're not just the captain of this ship, you are its soul You are so fierce and unflinching. But why not apply some of that fearlessness to your own life and just ask poor Ava out already?

Ray

We need to tell Sara we gotta get to Detroit.

Nope. She's off to Star City. She's been texting some guy. They're going on a date.

Ray

How do you know that? Wait, you're looking at her phone?

I look at everyone's phone. Helps pass the time.

All right, let's go check this out. We need to find Elvis before panic sets in.

Elvis Presley's uncle preached at the Church of Zion every Sunday. The boy never missed a service.

You heard the lady. [Everyone just stares silently at Sara.] What? Why are you staring at me?

You know, we're waiting for you to... do the thing you do.

What thing?

Ray

You know. You usually send us into the field with a little more pizzazz.

[rolls her eyes, sighs, and turns to leave.] Okay, Legends, put on your Sunday best because we are going to church!

[off everyone else's approval] That's pretty good.

Ray

Amen!

Hey, uh, what happens if we don't repair history?

Ray

Working theory: time is frappéd together like a smoothie. So instead of just dealing with Julius Caesar in Aruba, we have to fight off Genghis Khan, a herd of woolly mammoths, and a swarm of locusts from the Old Testament.

And Mallus is freed from time jail so he can rule over this giant mess.

So, worse than Flashpoint.

Ray

Uh, is that what we're calling the thing that Barry did? Oh, I think it's something similar.

[The Legends have infiltrated the Beatles' first American arrival.]

Hey, Z. If you had to sleep with one, which one would it be?

How can you even tell them apart?

Ray

Well, Paul is the cute one, George is the quiet one, there's Ringo --

I never met an Englishman I haven't wanted to punch in the face.

Relax, Mick. If it wasn't for the British Invasion, there'd be no Rolling Stones, no Led Zep,.... no Black Sabbath.

Black Sabbath.

Nope.

Well, then, we ... we need to protect these mopheads from whatever's screwing up history.

That's right, Mick.

Prudence, this is your fairy godmother?

PPrudence

Yes. She protects me.

By hurting other people.

Not at all. I only want to help little Prudence. For you see,

[sings] There are times the world is scary.

Times the world is BAD.

But when your godmother's a fairy,

there's no reason to be saaaaaaad.

Ray

Is that music?

[continuing her song]

Oh, fear not if things don't look to be

the way that you preferred.

Just make a wish and look to me.

I'll sing these magic words–

Shut up.

Ray

Well, I didn't want her to stop singing.

What happened to your old crew? [shows a tabloid cover of the Legends dressed in their disco outfits from "Here I Go Again"]

Ray

Well, Sara met a special someone, and they're trying to make it work.

Oh, that'll kill a band.

Ray

Mmm. My best friend Nate, he, uh, has a desk job. And Amaya,... Well, she's gone. And I actually really miss her. She was kind of our moral compass. Helped us do the right thing when it wasn't always easy to do the right thing.

I never knew disco could get so barmy.

Ray

Heh. Yeah, I guess the way we did it, it did get pretty "bah-my".

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