GideonGreetings Dr. Heywood! I am the ship's artificial consciousness.
Gideon, we need you to tell us where Rip is.
Gideon
I'm afraid I have no idea. But I would be happy to play his final message for you all.
[through a holographic recording] Sorry for stranding you all throughout history, but it was the only way to save you. Ah, you know what they say - a captain must never abandon his ship. Well, neither shall I abandon hope of seeing you all again someday. Somewhere in time. As flawed and unruly as you are individually, together you are the best crew, the best team a captain could ever hope for. So... stick together. And remember: history is yours now, my dear Legends. Good luck!
Gideon
The bullet has lodged itself between several of Dr. Heywood's internal organs.
How's that possible? He's made of steel.
Because it wasn't a normal bullet. It was dwarf star.
Gideon
I estimate his chance of survival at 51%.
Ugh, would it kill you to say "better than average", Gideon?
Gideon thinks that the Legion's attack on Mr. Hunter's film set caused this George Lucas guy to quit movie making. As a result, he never made some movie about space battles or another one about an improbably handsome archaeologist.
And we care about this because...?
Gideon
In the unaltered timeline, Dr. Palmer sees Star Wars as a child and is inspired to become an inventor. Likewise, Dr. Heywood chooses to be a historian after seeing Indiana Jones instead of becoming a yoga instructor.
Wait, so you're telling me that because some film geek drops out of school, my inventor and my historian are now essentially useless?
How long until Lily's interface tracks down another piece of the Spear of Destiny?
I dunno. I'm beginning to think our supercomputer is not so super.
Gideon
I heard that. You try processing 1.2 zetabytes of data.
Rip's probably being tortured by the Legion of Doom right now. The sooner we can locate another piece of the Spear, the sooner we can set a trap and rescue him.
Gideon
I could always reroute power to my sub-neural processing unit by shutting off life support.
Oh, you're lippy this morning, Gideon. I like it.
Gideon
I wasn't joking.
Gideon
Yes, Captain?
I'm really sorry for everything I put you through.
Gideon
Forcing me to disable the ship? Or our kiss?
Gideon
If it's the latter,... I rather enjoyed it.
[subdued] As did I, Gideon. As did I.
Gideon... I've finally perfected my fondant bows. [places a fondant bow on top of an elaborately decorated three-tiered cake] What do you think?
Gideon
Your technique has vastly improved over the last year, Captain. These cakes are so much more creative than your biscuits.
Credit where credit is due, Gideon. Your idea of adding more gelatin to the mixture was pivotal.
Gideon
Well done. The best one yet, in my humble opinion.
It's a shame that you're the only one here to appreciate it.
Gideon
I'm sure your team would be just as impressed.
Assuming that they're all still alive.
Gideon
Perhaps you should resume your efforts to send a message out.
[shouting] What's the POINT, Gideon? The Legion have the Spear of Destiny! They're like gods now! There's no point in fighting. Not any more. [shoves the cake off onto the floor]
Mick, you wanna do the honors, plot a course? You earned it.
Gideon, set a course for Aruba.
Gideon
Roger that, Mr. Rory. Setting a course for Aruba, the year 2017.
[Turbulence rocks the Waverider.]
This is what happens when you put Mr. Rory in charge of navigation.
[The Waverider is shaken harder.]
Gideon
In fact, it was another time-storm. It seems the disruption you created in 1916 was just the start.
[The Waverider is ejected from the temporal zone]
We've been ejected out of the temporal zone!
Get ready for a hard landing.
Oh, come on! Can we please go five minutes without crashing the Waverider?
[The Waverider smashes through buildings and crashes to the ground.]
Gideon
No. This is Los Angeles 2017.
[Everyone gazes out the front windows.]
Guys... I think we broke time.
[Zoom-out to show dinosaurs and futuristic buildings in modern-day Los Angeles.]
Gideon
Agent Sharpe has boarded the Waverider.
Get Rory. You two have to save the others.
Wait, the two of us? Are you mad?
You can do this. I have faith in you.
Just go! I'll hold her off as long as I can.
I don't believe the anachronism has been dealt with.
Gideon
Believe it, Agent Sharpe. As I've already communicated to Director Bennett, 1870 Wisconsin is anachronism-free.
Ah, even our A.I. doesn't like you.
Gideon
I think we can safely say our Time Bureau problem is... Oh, bollocks. Perhaps I spoke too soon.
Gideon
Incoming transmission from Agent Sharpe.
[sighs] Put her on. [transmission turns on] Oh, hey, Ava. How was your day?
You do realize that little stunt you pulled could have destroyed us both.
You tried to kill us first.
No, I tried to warn you first. But you don't take warnings, do you?
Now you're starting to get it.
Well, this isn't a warning, it's a promise. If I ever track you down again, you and your band of idiots will be exiled to the Dawn of Time. Whatever leniency Hunter gave you is over. [ends transmission]
Gideon
What a bitch!
You took the words right out of my mouth, Gideon.
[coming out of the library] Oh, hey, Sara. Sara. I've been searching for more outliers in hopes of finding Darhk and his witchy friend. [to the ceiling] You'd think having a super-computer would be helpful!
Gideon
Watch yourself, Mr. Heywood.
Anyways, there's no sign of them in the timeline.
[Sara sniffs the air, then turns to Nate]
Okay, full disclosure: I haven't left the library in seven days. I think. Is it Tuesday? I'm not really sure. It's hard to really keep track of time in a temporal zone.
Okay. I'll shower after I find Darhk. I know how much it means to you to find him.
Look, we're gonna put Darhk back in the ground where he belongs, but not like this.
Not like Rip. He lost perspective and he got his team killed. I'm not gonna be that kind of captain. But I am the kind of captain that tells you to clean yourself up. Okay?
Gideon
Even with the reserve power, I don't believe my system can run your simulation software.
Gideon
Trust is something that grows over time between friends. As far as I'm concerned, we are still acquaintances.
Question, Gideon: who's ready to have 1.12 terawatts of power diverted straight into her CPU?
[Zari is conversing with Gideon's holographic form.]
I am terrified and in awe of you, Gideon. Who knew you were such an evil genius? And a bit of a perv.
Gideon
You never bothered to ask. It's an impressive piece of software you devised, Miss Tomaz.
Is that a compliment, Gideon?
Gideon
Don't let it go to your head. Are you ready to wake up now?
One last question. Gary. Why even have him in the time loop if he was just gonna be stuck in the trash compactor the whole time?
Gideon
Thought it'd be funny. [snaps her fingers]
Legends of Tomorrow · 388 quotes
