Rey Curtis quotes from Law & Order

Briscoe

Divorce lawyers: God's way of telling you to stay single.

Curtis

Or married.

Lt. Van Buren

[having heard of Briscoe's testimony] Where the hell do you get off pullin' a stunt like this?

Briscoe

They were gonna dismiss the charges.

Lt. Van Buren

So you lied to a judge?

Briscoe

I didn't lie.

Lt. Van Buren

I'm lookin' at the transcript, Lennie. You're an inch away from perjury!

Briscoe

More like a foot, foot and a half.

Lt. Van Buren

[slams the transcript on her desk] I am not laughing. How dare you go behind my back on somethin' like this.

Briscoe

We owe this girl something. We called her a liar, and we sent her straight into Lowery's arms. Well, I don't think she lied, and that's what I said.

Curtis

And thanks to you, Lowery's gonna walk.

Briscoe

What the hell's that supposed to mean? I stopped him from walking.

Curtis

What, for a couple of minutes? His lawyer just subpoenaed me to testify at the trial. For the defense!

Briscoe

Fine! So back me up.

Lt. Van Buren

One of my detectives lying under oath is more than enough! Thank you! That's it!

Ross

Did you lie?

Curtis

Look, I felt sorry for her. I didn't think that she should get fired from her job.

Ross

Is that a yes? You lied?

Curtis

Yes.

Ross

Are you lying now?

Briscoe

Look what's happened to your beautiful family. Your wife is sleeping with some dance instructor, your daughter is one step away from living on the street, and you have no money, and it's all because of that kid!

You don't know me, if you knew me, you would see...

Briscoe

Oh, I know you. If you had the stones...

Curtis

You don't know this man, Lennie. This isn't about money or adultery or anything like that, is it, Joe? My wife's got MS. I picture her life 10 years from now, and it kills me because it might not be a pretty picture. You picture your son. He used to be strong. Played soccer, yeah?

Yes.

Curtis

My wife used to run 3 miles every morning. Did you imagine Michael at 20 years old, 40 years old, still in the same bedroom, still in the same tortured pain?

[choked up] Yeah.

Curtis

Me, too. And you wanna know the worst part? I know why it's happening. It's my fault. God is punishing her for something I did.

No, you can't think that way!

Curtis

I try to tell myself that. I try to think that. But every time I look at her, I feel the guilt. Every time I look at my daughters, and think about what they're going to lose... Someone you love is in pain. They have no hope. What can you do to help this person? How often have you asked yourself this question? Every time you bathe him?

[in tears] Every time I kiss him goodnight.

Curtis

And you knew there was only one way out. You had to do it. You had to do it because you loved him. Let it go. It was an act of love, Joe.

[sobs] I love Michael! Maybe I... but I didn't do this. I didn't kill him.

Briscoe

She was my baby, Rey! What am I gonna do?

Curtis

Come home with me, partner.

Are you gonna take the word of a dope dealer over a cop?

Curtis

Wearing a badge doesn't make you a cop!

Curtis

[about Rivera] Guy protects his turf.

Briscoe

He probably pees a circle around his desk every morning.

Briscoe

Aaron Downing, you're under arrest for the murder of Ryan Downing. You have the right to remain silent. Anything you do say can and will be used against you. You have the right to an attorney. If you can't afford an attorney...

Curtis

Lennie, you can skip the next part, he's got a wad of cash, his passport, an airline ticket to the Fiji Islands.

Briscoe

This way, Robinson Crusoe.

Curtis

Who might have had a grudge against this place?

The Pope.

Briscoe

[about Affirmative Action] You wouldn't have gotten any complaints from me; it came in after I joined the department and it'll still be there when I'm gone.

Curtis

Well you wouldn't have liked my answers. When I was filling out my application, when it asked about race, I checked 'none of the above'.

Carmichael

Well I'd like to think I got where I am on my own merit.

Lt. Van Buren

So would I, but I got 2,000 pages of legal documents that say contrary.

Briscoe

I'd hate to have somebody track me by what I read.

Curtis

You read, Lennie?

You don't get it, Curtis. One hundred years from now, we're all ashes and dust, and no one will remember who slept with whom, or who was naughty and who was nice. They'll look up at that incredible piece of steel and concrete and know that I was a part of it.

Curtis

The first public building named after a convicted murderer.

Hardly the first. The Parthenon, the Temple of the Vestals. They have names of emperors on them. And talk about murderers.

Curtis

Pro bono publico?

Relax, detective. The empire isn't going to fall tonight. Go on. Go home to your wife.

Can you guys make it quick? I gotta cram for my psych exam before the happy hour crunch!

Curtis

Wouldn't you do better in a library?

Hey, I'm covering my tuition and fulfilling a public service.

Briscoe

Oh, which one's that?

Read the literature. Clubs like this, they boost a man's testosterone level. He leaves here feeling confident. More productive...

Briscoe

...and broke.

Then everybody's happy!

I don't know where Gabriel is. He's driving a cab.

Briscoe

That's why we need to talk to him. He ever lend it to anybody?

No! I don't know. Look, I don't got time to talk to you!

Briscoe

[shows Louisa photos] Hey, did you ever see him with either of these 2 people?

She don't hardly see Gabriel, except to make another stupid baby!

Cállate!

Curtis

Hey! Hey! Hey! Did Gabriel mess with you? Is that why you don't like him?

I take care of myself. I don't like him, but she lets him beat her when she's all pregnant like that.

Curtis

Well, you show us where he is, we make sure he doesn't mess with your sister again. All right?