Jack McCoy quotes from Law & Order

I run a business, Mr. McCoy. Everyone loves a perfect product, but if it's too expensive or inconvenient, no one buys it. The airlines could hand-search every passenger on every flight, but the delays would put them out of business. Cars could be made as safe as tanks, but how many people could afford a car that costs as much as a house? Risk-return analysis isn't reckless. It's responsible business.

McCoy

So is keeping your customers alive.

Serena

:[meeting Jack at a basketball court where he is playing with other attorneys] What's the score?

McCoy

Legal Aid's up by six. All free-throws. You know defense attorneys. They like to complain they've been fouled every chance they get.

[to his son, Tommy, who has just testified against him] Better watch your back, Tommy.

Serena

Some people pass down pocket watches.

McCoy

Tradition.

McCoy

[about Branch] Nice fella.

Serena

And his politics?

McCoy

[pause] Nice fella.

Serena

I thought you said no jury would convict Little Orphan Annie.

McCoy

I did. Lizzie Borden is a different matter.

You know, this whole affair makes you think twice.

McCoy

About the death penalty?

About where to buy you a steak.

The Hagen women stand by their men. It's part of their vows: "I promise to love, honor, respect and obey, and let you run around with as many women as you want."

McCoy

Even if he kills them.

They're not that picky.

Hello, Jack. Okay, let's talk turkey. What are you up to? And don't give me that party line about Preuss being a threat to society.

McCoy

When you argue, I have this compulsive need to argue back.

Serena

[about the Falun Gong protestors] You should have seen them, Jack. Talk about weird. They were just frozen there like statues.

McCoy

In this country, weird's allowed.

McCoy

Feeling good, are we?

Serena

It really makes my day when a mother kills her son for no reason whatsoever.

McCoy

Call Hallmark. Maybe they'll print up a special card.

Justification?

Serena

"Yes, I killed, but God told me to."

You gotta admit, it's a lot more creative than "the Devil made me do it".

McCoy

Next stop, virgin sacrifices.

McCoy

Smile, Serena. This is our Inherit the Wind. This is where we get to prove in a court of law that there is no big guy up there with the white beard pulling invisible strings.

Serena

So what exactly did those nuns do to you?

[after being caught suborning perjury] Thirty years I've been at this. Thirty years trying to knock six months to a year off the sentence of some piece of dirt who, when all is said and done, is gonna rot in Hell anyway. That's some way to measure your life, isn't it? Counting the time that murderers aren't in prison. I have measured out my life in coffee spoons. Couple bucks here and there. A week in Miami Beach twice a year. What about you, Jack? Who are you?

McCoy

I do what my job requires.

That's not enough for me. For once in my sorry life, I dared to eat the peach.

Serena

Not that it matters, but does he feel any kind of remorse at all?

No. Clay Warner couldn't care less about anyone.

McCoy

I can't think of a better candidate for execution.

McCoy

4 people got on the boat, one got off. The math's not difficult.

I don't like boats. They dropped me off in Greenport. Darrell and everybody were fine.

Serena

Yeah, there is that pirate problem.