Escargoon quotes from Kirby: Right Back at Ya!

I paid Nightmare Enterprises a heap o' money so they can send me a heap o' popcorn?

Escargoon

Looks that way...

View quote →

Tiff. Have you ever met that snail before?

Never. I was just being nice to him because he seemed so upset.

Hmmm. We've never met, but somehow he knew both of our names.

I think the guy's missing a few marbles.

Maybe so. We'd better keep an eye on him in case his condition worsens.

I wonder if his name really is Escargoon...

Escargoon

[having overheard Tiff & Meta Knight's conversation and realizing they've forgotten him as well] Oh, mercy! This is the darkest day of my life! [runs away, crying]

View quote →

Ahh, [chuckles] Ain't nothin' like startin' the day off with a bubblin' bath.

Escargoon

It's great to be the king.

Mmm-hm.

View quote →

Knuckle Joe ain't qualified to work for N.M.E.!

Escargoon

That punk's too goody-goody!

View quote →

Kirby's too exhausted to put up a fight!

Kirby, suck it up!

[Kirby attempts to inhale, but Masher's attacks are too fast to give him a chance to do so and quickly pummel him to the point of badly injuring him]

[gasps] NO! [Masher closes in on the injured Kirby] Get up, Kirby!

[Meta Knight attempts to save Kirby, but Masher smacks him hard against the hill's wall]

SKSword Knight & Blade Knight

[rushing over to Meta Knight] Meta Knight!

It whupped Meta Knight quick.

Escargoon

That Masher's a marvel.

laughs You ain't seen nothin' yet.

View quote →

[Masher and Knuckle Joe continue pounding on Kirby until he's slammed into the base of a nearby hill]

No, Kirby!

Knuckle Joe, please stop!

[Masher floats back down onto the ground and Knuckle Joe approaches Kirby]

Kirby.

[Kirby struggles to get back on his feet, but is unable to even stand]

Okay. Finish him.

[Tiff and Tuff gasp and Kirby still struggles to stand]

[leaps in the air to attack] Smash Punch! Kirby, suck it up!

[Kirby reacts and stands up just in time to inhale Knuckle Joe's Smash Punch, transforming into Fighter Kirby and restoring his strength]

Oh, wow!

Fighter Kirby!

[Kirby lands and mimics Knuckle Joe's nose rub]

Now we got a real fight. Alright Masher, do your stuff.

[Masher swings both its spiked ball and handle of its flail quickly and continuously. Then Knuckle Joe leaps up and attacks Masher]

Spin Kick!

[Knuckle Joe's sudden betrayal against Masher takes everyone by surprise]

Vulcan Jab, Vulcan Jab!

[Knuckle Joe's Vulcan Jabs eventually knock Masher Down. King Dedede and Escargoon drive down to approach Knuckle Joe]

[in reaction to Knuckle Joe's sudden betrayal against Masher] You was supposed to clobber Kirby, not mess with Masher!

I tricked ya!

[everyone reacts in surprise]

Whazzat?

It took a long time to plan, but it was worth it. I'm a monster hunter now, and I wanted to bag one of the big ones. That meant goin' after Masher!

So that's it.

You didn't work for them. You were only pretending to work for Nightmare Enterprises!

Yeah, I figured the company wasn't gonna let me anywhere near their really strong monsters, so I just sent them my resume.

Hmmm. So you hunted down Masher... with a suit and tie?

That's De-de-de-devious! [laughing]

Escargoon

What are you laughing at? Knuckle Joe just made you look like a knucklehead.

AAAAH! You two-timer! Nobody monkeys with Triple D!

Sorry, tubby. Too late!

[growls angrily] Masher, pummel them two pole-cats! I want ya to grind 'em into grit!

[Masher stands up and angrily glares at both Knuckle Joe and Kirby]

Ready for some tag-team attacks, Kirby?

Kirby

Poyo. [mimics Knuckle Joe's nose rub]

View quote →

Eh, what happened?

Escargoon

You were sleepwalking, that's what happened! Or should I say you were sleepwhacking!

View quote →

MMabel

The monster that has been haunting you is your conscience, Sire.

What's a conscience?

MMabel

It is the goodness that lies in the deepest part of you.

Escargoon

Oh please. The only thing lying in the deepest part of him is a fried cheese log.

View quote →

What? You're leaving?

Escargoon

I wanted to spend this time with my mama. I thought you might get hungry at the end so here's where all the snacks are.

You always stay by my side no matter what.

Escargoon

Oh, Majesty! Farewell. [He attempts to leave, but suddenly a ripping sound is heard from Dedede tearing the letter in pieces]

You ain't leaving now!

Escargoon

Huh? [As Dedede hugging him] LET ME GO, I'M GETTING OUT OF HERE!

[laughing, Escargoon grunting] What's the matter with you, Escargoon? Can't you take the heat!? [laughing]

Escargoon

I WANT MY MAMA!!!

View quote →

Escargoon

Sire, you're a one tactless-blubber mouth. [Dedede punches him]

Keep quiet, you! [Escargoon weeps] Huh?

[Escargoon cries loudly]

Hey, what's the matter, ol' buddy?

Escargoon

It's...just...so sad. [sobs] I'll never call you "blubber mouth" again.

Yeah... that's right. And pretty soon I won't be able to smash you with my mallet no more neither.

Escargoon

[Sighs] Sire.

Escargoon! [He and Escargoon bawl as they embrace]

View quote →

Now that them bothersome animals is gone, I can finally get to work!

Escargoon

Go ahead and slice the tree like you slice your tee-off shots.

At last, I'm gonna achieve my goal of cutting down all these trees to build myself a country club. [sniffs] It's truly a dream come true..! [whimpers, then cries loudly]

Escargoon

Save the tears for your golf course, Sire. Now it's time to start hacking.

[stops crying] Good idea. [laughing]

View quote →

Escargoon!

Escargoon

Your majesty! Come back!

We've been De-De-Divided!

View quote →

Please don't fall, Acore!

Tokkori

It's too much! We can't hold 'im!

Yes, we can, just push!

CCoo

We can't give up!

RRick

We can't let our friend come crashin' to the ground, mates!

[meanwhile, King Dedede and Escargoon are watching Kirby and co.'s valiant efforts to keep Acore standing from atop a nearby cliff]

[laughing] Them do-gooders think we gave up!

Escargoon

They're always overestimatin' our common sense. [has the Grasshopper Eavesdropper detonate near a nearby waterfall, causing a flood in one final attempt to destroy Acore]

View quote →

Escargoon! Let's play some putt-putt!

Escargoon

I don't have time to watch you cheat at miniature golf. My entire life savings are in jeopardy!

Whadda ya mean I cheat?

Escargoon

Oops.

I ain't never cheated at miniature golf!

View quote →

Kabu here is not only extremely ancient, but he's also the wisest-- [notices the tourists throwing coins into Kabu's insides and gasps] Hey, no throwing coins!

[the tourists continue to throw coins into Kabu anyway]

Let them folks toss away. It's free money.

[the tourists start painting graffiti all over Kabu]

Tiff, look what they're doin'! [Tiff notices what the tourists are now doing to Kabu] Knock it off!

Kabu's one of the greatest treasures in Dream Land!

[the tourists bicker back at her in a foreign language]

WDWaddle Doo

Chill out. We do this every place we visit.