Flash-in-Lex quotes from Justice League Unlimited

Mirror Master!

Mirror Master

You’re quick as ever.

Yeah? Well, you’re... you’re not really all there!

Mirror Master

Oh, nice try. If you'd had another minute you’d probably think of a decent comeback. [the disco ball starts firing random lasers at Flash, who evades] Sadly you don't have the time. [one of the blasts takes Flash down] In another minute you'll be dead!

For his charitable work with the city's underprivileged, his bravery during the Thanagarian crisis, and most of all, for his great help reducing crime in Central City, I proclaim this Flash Appreciation Day!

Thanks, Mayor. Thanks, folks. Wow. You've all been so great to me over the years. It really gets to me, you know? Hope I always make you guys proud. Um, that's all. How's it going? Nice slacks. Thanks. Hey, Mrs. Green. I didn't forget about painting your fence Saturday. Once I get started, it won't take very long. Tom, are we still on for mini-golf Sunday? Oh, don't jump. Mover rings! Clear the area! That should do it. Duh.

Captain Boomerang

Good day, mate. Captain Boomerang here. Seems the Mirror Master wasn't up to the task. Now it's my shot. I'm going to kill you, Ugly Flash, and I want you to see it coming.

[To Captain Boomerang] I swear, when I get outta this, I'm gonna find you and hurl all over you!

Captain Boomerang

Touch of dizziness. You might find it useful to fix on one point on the horizon. For instance, that mountain you're set to crash into.

Orion

Flash?

Hey, guys.

Orion

You're tied to a very large boomerang.

Yeah? What are you guys doing here? The thing isn't for another hour.

Orion

Someone means to kill you.

You don't say.

Waller told me that Boomerang left Task Force X. So I did some checking. Three other super-criminals from Central City are off the radar.

Hey, Mirror Master took a shot at me too.

Here's what we're going to do.

Listen, I need to go home and change before the opening tonight.

We're coming with you.

You really don't have to.

We're coming. With you.

[Sighs] Okay! You guys are so slow!

All clear on my end. And I've removed every mirrored surface in the entire museum.

Orion

To enter the building, they'd have to come through us. They'd be stupid to try. [about Flash] Central City builds statues to this fool who makes bad jokes. Who concerns himself with pitiful men like the Trickster. I don't understand.

No, you don't.

Flash, hi. Over here. Evening news.

Uh-huh.

I'm going live again in about 50 seconds. Can I get a few words from you then?

Huh? Uh, oh, sure.

Super. And, uh, here. Oh, uh, thanks.

Thirty seconds, Linda.

Okay, let me touch up.

Mirror Master

Shh. Now!

Captain Boomerang

Thanks, miss.

Captain Cold

We'll take it from here.

Mirror Master

If we aren't taking turns, let's at least see who hurts him the worst.

Better you than me. Oh, Boomer. Not the Turtle Man display.

Captain Boomerang

Argh! Hey, been lookin' for that.

You are so cleaning this place up.

Mirror Master

Make me. Or rather, find me.

Nope. Nope. Nope.

Mirror Master

Ugh!

There you are.

Time out, time out.

Hang on, lady.

Oof! Ugh! I've never seen so many stars. Are we dead?

Those aren't stars. They're millions and millions of mirrors. We're trapped in another dimension. You mind if I carry you?

Please. Did it work?

Kinda. We know that isn't the mirror that takes us out of here.

We have to try them one at a time? That could take years, even for you.

Captain Cold

Where'd he go?

Mirror Master

He's gone. Lost forever in a mirror. Time to seek the nearest exit.

Captain Cold

That's it? I was all set to crack some bones.

Orion

Then brace yourself!

Captain Cold

Let's make sure this one don't get up again.

Mirror Master

Missed me.

Flash, look.

Captain Boomerang

This'll make my rep forever.

Captain Cold

Argh!

Mirror Master

Gentlemen. Are you sure that's all of the pieces? I demand a full accounting. Where's my lawyer? I know my rights, you obscene caricature of a civil servant!

So don't worry, we took care of the bad guys, and everything's okay now.

Flash, what about the new museum? It got destroyed in the battle, and it was our biggest shrine to you. And you're our greatest hero, our greatest hope.

Well, at least I got to be on TV. And you know how much I like that.

Orion

Now I understand. You play the fool to hide a warrior's pain.

Dude. Bad guys went down, and no one got hurt. You know what I call that? A really good day.

Ahem.

What?

Are you gonna wash your hands?

No! 'Cause I'm evil!

Tala

Just rest in here.

Hey - that's not restful.

Me, the Flash? You've, like, totally lost it, Grodd. I'm Lex Luthor!

Grodd

And I'm Charlton Heston.

You, evil-head guy! What's your part in this plan?

I'm not in the plan.

[pause] Exactly! Pop quiz! Everyone tell me his or her part in the plan.

Attention! The man you think is Luthor is actually a Justice Leaguer disguised as me. Repeat: he is not Luthor.

...I, Lex Luthor, find that preposterous.

Guys! I was starting to think I was going to go out as the bottom of a supervillain dog pile!

Green Lantern

It sounds like Wally, but is there any way to be sure?

You want proof? Until he went off into the Marines, GL's nickname was-

Green Lantern

Stop! It's him. Man, you promised never to repeat that story!

I know, I was just messing with your head.

Well, can you tell us anything about Grodd's Secret Society? Where's the headquarters?

I don't know. In a swamp?

Green Lantern

We gotta find a way to take this out for good!

Why don't you just throw it into the sun? [pauses and stares at Green Lantern] Yeah, I guess that's a pretty stupid idea.

Green Lantern

No, maybe you're on to something. But I'll need more leverage. And a trench!

On it! [he runs around and around in a circle, creating a trench around the drill] Now what? [Green Lantern creates a catapult with his ring] Aw, cool! [Green Lantern flings the drill]

Green Lantern

Doesn't look like it quite made escape velocity. [The drill hits a ship, which explodes]

Good effort, though.

This has been the scene all over the world. In the wake of Darkseid's defeat, his attacking forces have withdrawn presumably back to wherever it is they came from.

Superman

Thanks to Luthor, of all people.

In many ways, Lex Luthor represents the worst of what mankind has to offer.

Superman

But he died saving us all.

I doubt that either of them died.

Superman

But we saw it this time!

You saw it last time too.

Green Lantern

What's that old saying? "Believe half of what you see..."

Shayera Hol

"...and none of what you hear." They'll be back.

And we'll be ready for them.

[on the cell phone to his wife] I should be back in time to dinner. I love you too.

These are the end times.

Superman

[to Batman] A head start? You're getting soft in your old age.

[smiling] Don't you have a tall building to go leap?

Wonder Woman

And the adventure continues.

Lex Luthor

Back off! Was there a plan here?

Take out the small fry until we attract the big fish's attention.

Lex Luthor

Ha! With everything going on, I'll bet he never notices us.

You're on.

Superman

I'll take some of that action.

Darkseid

I hope you appreciate, Kal-El, that everything that happens from this point is on your head. The skies will rain fire, the oceans will boil, the streets will run red with the blood of billions. Only then, after your last pitiful hope is extinguished, will I end your life. Let's go.

Lex Luthor

You destroyed Brainiac! I'm gonna make you pay!

Darkseid

Unlikely. [blows Luthor away] I'm more powerful than I've ever been, and the last time we met, you barely managed to hold your own.

Superman

Funny. That's not how I remember it.

Darkseid

Allow me to refresh your memory. [Darkseid picks up the Daily Planet globe and uses it to slam Superman through every floor of the building]

I have to go help.

I know.

Find shelter. I'll be back as soon as I can.

Blue Devil got me close enough to get a good look. Those big burrowing machines are magma tappers.

At least now we know what they're trying to do. The invaders are setting up drilling machines to tap the heat at the Earth's core.

They're trying to create fire pits. If they succeed, it's apocalypse on Earth.

They won't succeed. Your primary targets are those drills. Destroy them at all costs.

Shayera Hol

You heard the man. Rock and roll. Looks like the main power coupling. Cover my backside.

Atomic Skull

Get out of here. It's gonna blow! Yeah!

Green Lantern

We gotta find a way to take this out for good.

Why don't you just throw it into the sun? Yeah, I guess that was a pretty stupid idea.

Green Lantern

No, maybe you're on to something. But I'll need more leverage, and a trench.

On it. Now what? Oh, cool.

Green Lantern

Doesn't look like it quite made escape velocity.

Nope. Good effort, though.