Josuke quotes from JoJo's Bizarre Adventure

Josuke

(after fusing Angelo with a stone) Enjoy your eternal penance, Angelo. Reflect on the life you stole from my grandpa and all the others!

Josuke

For the love of God, drop the meat!

Josuke

Yup. Since you've gotten a clean bill of health from Crazy Diamond, when I pound your ass into the ground, I can avoid looking like a coward, right?!

Josuke

Man, I feel so invigorated! I feel like it's the early hours of New Year's day, and I just put on a fresh pair of my favorite underwear!

Josuke

I told you to rethink your stupid ideas, but your ideas aren't really the problem. You're just an idiot.

Josuke

Seriously? There are other Stand users besides us at this school?

Yeah. He's Toshikazu Hazamada, a student in 3-C. This Hazamada guy apparently got into an argument over something silly with a friend right around the start of spring. One of them had insulted the other's favorite idol or anime or something. That night, surprisingly, the friend he got into an argument with gouged out his own eye with a mechanical pencil. Isn't that insane?

Apparently Hazamada's friend said this at the hospital: "Next thing I knew, I was staring with at my left eye, which I'd gouged out, with my right eye.

Koichi

Wh... What should I do... To make Yukako think that I'm bad for her?

Josuke

Well, most girls aren't into bad hygiene or momma's boys.

Koichi

I-I don't want her to think I'm a momma's boy! She might get mad at my mom and put her in danger!

Okuyasu

Then it's a bad hygiene for you! Starting today, don't take baths!

Koichi

Huh?

Josuke

Yeah, and don't brush your teeth or change your underwear.

Okuyasu

How about getting some lice or spiders in your hair?

Josuke

Having smelly socks is pretty bad.

Okuyasu

Maybe you should fart all the time too!

Josuke

Oh yes, she'll totally hate that!

I'm ready for round 2 with Crazy Diamond, but I'll only use my little pinky... just like I did with Okuyasu!

Josuke

If you're planning to use only your pinky in this showdown, then I've got a couple of rules of my own.

You can take your rules and shove 'em, fool! Rules are wasted on a punk kid like you!

AAAAAAAAAAAGH! YOU DAMN BASTARD! HOW DARE YOU?!

Josuke

Well, you did say that rules are wasted on me. You also said something about bringing me down with your pinky finger. So what's the wannabe rocker Otoishi gonna do now?

I'll kill you.

Josuke

YOU ALREADY SAID THAT! Don't you have any new material, fool?!

[feeling the baby] Josuke... this is a girl.

Josuke

Yeah, you can tell if it's a boy or a girl by feeling between the legs.

[cuts his hand] Josuke... if this kills me, please give my regards to your mother. I am quite old, after all.

Josuke

What the hell are you doing?

Adding color to the water so that we can trace the baby.

Josuke

Why would he do this for a baby, for someone he doesn't even know?

I just wanted to look cool, in front of my boy.

Josuke

What the hell... did you say... HUH?!?!?!?!

Okuyasu

Just take it easy, Josuke!

Josuke

I dare you to insult my hair again!!!!!!!

Rohan

If you insist. Fine, here goes. You might think your hair looks cool, but in actuality it may be the shittiest hairstyle I've ever had the misfortune of laying eyes upon! Though to be fair, that nest atop your useless noggin may come in handy should a pigeon come by and decide to roost. But that's a very strong "may".

DORARARARARARARARARARARARARARARARARARARARARARARARARA!!!!!

Rohan

Now witness Heaven's Door! I win. (it backfires on him)

Okuyasu

How the...?!

DORARARARARARARARARARARARARARARARARARARARARARARARARA!!!!!

Rohan

How is this happening?! I'm certain his eyes were open and he got a full flash of the manuscript! So why hasn't my Stand ability taken the fact?!

Koichi

We're back to normal!

Okuyasu

You're right!

Rohan

I know I showed him the page... So why?

Josuke

Where the hell did you slither off to?! Get out of here, you punk bitch!!!!!

Okuyasu

Hey, I don't think he can see straight right now...

Josuke

Come on out, you manga-obsessed asshole! I've got a story for you!

Josuke

Whoever insults my hair will get the full brunt of my fury! I WON'T STAND FOR THAT BULLSHIT!

Josuke

THERE YOU ARE, MANGA ARTIST!!!!! LAST I CHECKED, I WAS NOT DONE PUNCHING YOU!!!!!!!!!

Okuyasu

His determination is pretty commendable, too...

Shigechi

It's you, Josuke...

Josuke

"Josuke?!" Sounds to me like you're forgetting something!

Okuyasu

(After Shigechi summons Harvest to find his sandwich bag) Damn, you are so annoying! Fine, search the room! I want you to! Search until you pass out! Go for it!

Josuke

For the last time, why would we steal a stupid sandwich?!

Mikitaka

So, this is Earth?

.................

Mikitaka

Last night I was taking a walk when suddenly I fell ill...

Mikitaka

It seems I lost consciousness. That would have been... about 13 Earth hours ago.

..............................

AHH HA HA HA HA HA HA!!

Okuyasu

Hahahahaha! This bastard... He's just pulling our legs... hahaha! And in a crop circle too...

Josuke

Damn, I wish I'd thought of this prank! Hahaha!

Okuyasu

Ahahahaha...

Josuke

Dude, it's cool. You can drop the act now. Keep going and you'll ruin it. Here, have some tissues.

Mikitaka

Thank you. It was quite delicious.

..................

Josuke

Uh, sorry about yesterday. The fire was, um, pretty bad, right?

Rohan

Yeah. I had a complete replica of the Drexel Heritage furniture used in the movie Pretty Woman, valued at 2.5 million, which was damaged beyond repair. Not that I care or anything.