“Goin' South” quotes from Jersey Shore

My uncles want me to just come here and bang everything, but I kinda want better quality girls.

I don't go tanning anymore because Obama put a 10% tax on tanning. I feel like he did that intentionally for us, like McCain would never put a 10% tax on tanning... because he is pale and he would probably wanna be tanned.

How many meatballs do you want?

I want two...in my face.

Pauly D

[about the cold rain in Rhode Island] Can't stand this weather. Ya can't get tanned in this weather, ya can't creep in this weather, you can't do anything... girls don't come out in this weather, they stay in the house.

Ronnie's at the club, hooking up with Grenades - that is a bigger, ugly chick - and also Landmines - which is a thin, ugly chick - and um, lovin' life.

I feel like a pilgrim from the frickin 20's!!!