Jersey Shore quotes

Pauly D

I was born and raised a guido. It's just a lifestyle; it's being Italian, it's representing, family, friends, tanning, gel, everything.

How do you go in a fucking jacuzzi with a thong and a bra? Wear a thong bikini, that's a little bit more classier if you're gonna wear anything at all, ya know what I mean?

You just take your shirt off and they come to you, it's like a fly comes to shit.

I'm going to Jersey Shore, bitch!

A guidette is somebody who knows how to club it up, takes really good care of themselves, has pretty hair, cakes on makeup, has tanned skin, wears the hottest heels, pretty much they know how to own it and rock it.

You can hate on me all you want to, but what can you possibly say to somebody that looks like Rambo, pretty much, with his shirt off.

I wait till the last minute to shave, I wait till the last minute to put the shirt on 'cause you feel fresh. These are rules to live by, shave last minute, haircut the day-of, maybe some tanning and the gym. You gotta do the guido handbook.

With me and Sam, it's not a matter of if she wants to hook up with me, it's a matter of just when I decide.

Everybody loves me, babies, dogs, ya know, hot girls, cougars. I just have unbelievable mass appeal.

The Ron-Ron Juice is the shit that gets the night going, I mean whenever that shit comes out it's always a filthy night.

I feel like this job is beneath me, I'm a bartender. I do, like, great things.

I had a feeling where I wanted to make out with somebody, so, umm, I just made out with Ryder, because all the guys like that.

Mike can be a nice guy, like, he shows his good side then he shows his jerk off side. That's what I like: a good guy and a jerk off, it's all in the same.

Pauly D

[about J-Woww] She just doesn't want to feel like a trashbag because she has a boyfriend and she kissed me with her tongue.

Saturday night, I'm going to Headliners. I'm looking to have more of a classy night tonight.